Meat Puppet
is smoother than a Sky Pirate. You know. Balthier. Not Vaan.

Do you buy him nice things to play with?

In accordance with government law.

I do feed him every day, though.

I don't know if I can manage it.

It's a guilty pleasure.

You know when cats try to jump out a window, but the window is shut?

Man that is smurfing hilarious.

That's a sad story.

What went wrong this time?

I have the same problem! Like I can't stop moving my foot around. This guy's grandfather asked me why I was doing it and I said it was a problem that I can't fix it is in my genes and he said
"Why don't you change them?"

VERY FUNNY ASSHOLE YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT
I wasn't even wearing jeans.
Anyway I attempted suicide twice that night.

I cannot help my genes.