Meat Puppet
is smoother than a Sky Pirate. You know. Balthier. Not Vaan.

Orcs are so not at the top. The Imperials are the pretty boys. Althuogh there is that new obsession with exotic looks now so okay you have a point.

Only the dark elves won't make it in because not even the dark elf boys like the dark elf girls.

girls
Nords at the top
Orcs at the bottom

boys
Orcs at the top
wood elves at the bottom

Or possibly, Morrowind's Top Models.

The Furreal Life. Oh smurf off.

She'll have her own hit reality TV show anytime now.

She's been around. I guess you could say that she's seen the world.

Is she only tough-ass because she's a Nord?

I'm talking about that tough-ass stripper whore (the blonde one) that you like. If I were her. And the person swinging the hammer was slightly below average at his or her trade.

I don't think, after being hit on the head with one of those, you'd have any priorities at all. You'd be DEAD. Unless it was being swung by some really weak person, like a midget or something. But those don't exist.

Then there's a chance they've already fallen off. Or, they could be too irrelevant to worry about. If I was getting hit in the head with a warhammer then grasping at a tiny, empty sac would be the lowest priority.