Headlines

Let us have some fun. The point of this exercise is to write a news headline that pertains to your life or your day. If you need an example follow this one:

Bunny Voted Most Awesome Person Ever to Live
Better than Jesus? Yes! Better than Jesus!

Let's hope for some hilarious headlines and whatnot. I guess if a moderator wants to regulate my thread they can. Let's go for one every ten posts!

Ready,
On your mark,
Get set,
Go!!

"Many Openings for Gynecologists" Says Hospital
Humourous subtitle not required

Mystery Illness Grasps foa!
Tearful badass, "I just pee and pee, all the time!"

"The Worlds Biggest Furry!"
"I'M NOT A DAMN FURRY!"

"We don't like fun things," scream forumers
Fun thread fails miserably on local internet forum

Bitter Woodland Creature Banned for Spamming
"I hate everything and everyone everywhere"

Bomb Planted In Wedding Cake Blows Up - Survivors share their grief
SI: "It was so unbelievable, CR was finaly dead!!"

Office Relinquishes Saturday Night
This ain't no disco

Declared Not Guilty!
Local bum cleared of all charges.

Attack of the Mutant Strawberries!
Many dead, even more eaten