Final Fantasy VII: The Musical
Following on the heels of the success of the film Advent Children and the spin-off game Dirge of Cerberus, Square-Enix today announced plans for an on-stage musical version of its epic masterpiece --- Final Fantasy VII. The project, tentatively titled Final Fantasy VII's First Big Musical, is stated as still being in the early planning stages. Proposed musical numbers include "You Make My HP Bar Go 'Thumpa-Thumpa'" (a duet performed by the characters Aeris/th Gainsborough and Cloud Strife) and "(I'll Find You In) The Promised Land," a solo by Cloud. "I've Finally Reached My Limit Break," a show-stopper for all of the major "hero" characters will also be featured.
The project's major staff stated that the Aeris/th death-scene presented an unusual challenge, given the violent nature of the scene. They insisted, however, that there is no truth to the "persistent" rumors" that they are considering scrapping the entire sequence and replacing it with a scene in which Sephiroth, Aeris/th, Cloud and Jenova join hands and sing "Kumbaya." They did confirm, however, that the characters Yuffie Kisaragi and Vincent Valentine, optional in the original game, will be appearing in this musical. Yuffie performs a number titled "Materia," a sultry riff on "Macavity" from the record-breaking Broadway musical Cats. Vincent, meanwhile, croons "I May Not Have Much of a Plot, But I Sure Look Hot in This Cape."
Whether the plot of the musical would include elements from any of the Final Fantasy VII spin-off projects could not be confirmed at this time. Officials at Square-Enix were unavailable for further comment. The announcement, however, delighted some FFVII fans, but was largely greeted with skepticism from the Final Fantasy community as a whole. One ardent fan stated "Yeah! A musical?! I am so there --- front row seats! Where do I get tickets?" Agent0042, a member of this board, stated "I wouldn't get your hopes up. This isn't an actual project, merely an elaborate joke written by myself and inflicted on a forum in need of some amusing humor."
