Old people should be banned from using computers (Network trouble)

My mum has jiggered her laptop in some fashion. We have a LAN, to which my netbook and my smartphone are connected. The internet works fine on both. However, her laptop cannot connect to the internet.

It connects to the router, and the Network Centre says that it has Internet Access, but my arse it does! I've run it through diagnostics and troubleshooting and have had reports that it has been successfully fixed, but my arse it has! My arsey arse!

I'm thinking it must be an issue with the laptop itself (because I can add two and two together and get four xD), but I've not the foggiest how to fix it quickly, and I just can't be arsed (ARSE) traipsing all over the computer to figure it out.

Please ask questions if you need more detailed info and I will do what I can to answer them.

A LAN you say?
Is the laptop receiving an IP address?

It should be. How would I go about checking that? Imagine you're giving lessons, haha.

That would be easier to answer if I knew what OS you were rocking

It sounds like Vista or 7.

Try the following:

Hit Start, and look for a search bar -- on Vista it'll say Start Search, on 7 it'll say Search programs & files. Type "cmd", hit enter.

type "ipconfig /all", hit enter, then answer me these questions three, ere the internet ye shall see:

What is your IPV4 IP Address for the connection that's in use (i.e., Local Area Connection for a wired connection, Wireless Network Connection for wireless)?

What is your default gateway?

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

(better yet, do "ipconfig /all > somefile.txt" then copy the new text file that creates to a thumb drive & move it to a computer that works so you can paste the whole troutaroo here)

next, type "ping," then a space, then your default gateway, then enter. Do you get "Request timed out" four times, or four lines that start with "Reply From"?

If you get replies, try pinging 173.194.75.94. Getting replies? Try pinging Google (173.194.75.94 is google.ca's IP) Getting replies? Probably a firewall. Does anyone know the windows equivalent of "ps ax"?

If you can ping by IP but not DNS, you'll need to launch a command prompt as an administrator and do a "netsh winsock reset" and reboot.

Woohoo! Step by step! Let's do this.

IPv4: 192.168.1.26 (Preferred)
Default Gateway: 192.168.1.1
Airspeed of an unladen swallow: What do you mean? An African or European swallow?

Replies obtained from all my pinging activity.

Also, I have the tasklist up (which I believe is the Windows ps ax). Which info you need?

Note: I have experience with this trout, and I know the Command stuff well. I just figure it's better to give me baby steps, in case you spot anything I missed. xD

Can you surf by IP? I'm reasonably certain you can, just want to make sure.

What we're looking for in the process list is firewall software -- if you can ping by DNS, you do in fact have internet connectivity. Sometimes malware acts in a firewall-like manner and blocks surfing, though.

Is there anything other than browsing that isn't working? Have you tried using POP email? If you don't use a POP client, you can try telnetting into your POP server, but I'm way to freaking lazy to type out a tutorial for that. Google it. Can you use an IRC client? Instant messenger like AIM? Torrent client?

Have you ruled out hardware? You might want to boot off of a LiveCD and see if you can surf in a pristine OS (If you don't already have a Knoppix disc, make one. You'll be glad you did when you run into a similar issue without a working computer with which to hop on the internet and ask for advice on a Final Fantasy message board)

Are you connecting by wireless or by ethernet? Which ever way you're using, have you tried connecting the other way? You're not using Internet Explorer, are you? If so, stop it at once. If you're using Firefox, have you tried Chrome? If you're using Chrome, have you tried Firefox? In what year did Richard Feynman win the Nobel Prize in Physics and who did he share it with? Have you tried using MSCONFIG to turn off all of the cruft & see if you can surf after a reboot?

When Bleys fixes this someone get him a Peace Prize.

Morning. Sorted the problem last night. Cheers for your advice, though. :D

He was connected to the wrong network :redface:

What's a network? ;)