Worse thoughts (CC: SHORTY)

I'm treating this like an email thread.

Oh god I'm going to die, oh god my stomach is devouring itself, oh god what if I can't make it down to Harrisburg in time to see my dad before whatever is wrong with him kills him, (statistically his auto immune disease usually doesn't get much better the older he gets) oh god what if i end up like that, oh god what am i losing so much strength, what if wayne is cheating on me? oh god why am i so paranoid, oh i don't want to move again, oh god i'm starting to have a panic attack, oh man, what if it isn't a panic attack and i'm actually dying, oh god i don't want to get in the car, what if someone crushes me in an accident, what if those crackers were bad, what if we brought roaches with us, what if we never are able to get rid of them, did that person wash their hands? am i coming down with something? am i ever going to feel better? i just want a steak? i just want to feel normal. i just want to feel happy and fun again. i want to smile. i want to feel like i matter to someone, i want to feel like i am someone. i'm 32 and i'm never going to have children (duh) and my parents are disappointed in me, oh god what about a career?

these are my daily thoughts times 1000. you just witnessed a day in the life of someone who suffers from severe anxiety

so to keep it on topic i guess, what uh, were you thinking about today?

i was thinking about the headache i had all day, the shopping i did after work, the cleaning i'm supposed to be doing now, and how fun the weekend will be

sry for positive

it's ok dad, just freaking out about everything in the world right now

You matter to someone, Scotty. You matter to someone.

I am currently thinking about whether to use an angular controller or a cold fusion controller or both.

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Originally Posted by snacks

am i ever going to feel better? i just want to feel normal. i just want to feel happy and fun again. i want to smile. i want to feel like i matter to someone, i want to feel like i am someone.

so to keep it on topic i guess, what uh, were you thinking about today?

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This is pretty much what I think everyday day along with some other stuff.

Right now I am thinking my tummy is disgusting and I am thirsty.

I'm doing my best lately to not talk about what I'm thinking about because talking what I'm thinking about can sometimes have a worse result than the one I desired. :p It requires a fair bit of effort because I don't like to keep things to myself, it's not in my nature.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by snacks

these are my daily thoughts times 1000. you just witnessed a day in the life of someone who suffers from severe anxiety

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medication bro

happy pills do wonders

I'm saying this from personal experience as someone who also has extreme anxiety

"whheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee"

I spent all day at a water park.

oh hey is this guy skt

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Originally Posted by Tifa's Boobs

oh hey is this guy skt

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yes

I am thinking about how I hate being paid bi-weekly on tuesdays and there fore hate the weekend before when I am always broke. and I'm very bored.

go out more imho

I don't have any worse thoughts than "sneaky smurfin' Russians".

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Originally Posted by Award Shorts

I don't have any worse thoughts than "sneaky smurfin' RussiansRaistilins".

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fixed :D