Outtakes

FF8

Raijin: Hey Headmaster Cid told us to send you a message, Ya know...Look I'm sorry, can you tell me whats my characters motivation is in this scene

Director: You have to tell Squall something.

Raijin: Ahhh Desperation.

Director: No. Just read the lines

Raijin: I'm just asking does my character have some kind of retardation

Director: Read the lines.

Raijin: I can't work like this

-Storms off-

Fujin: DICK

Squall: Ahh thats the broom closet.

Raijin: (From inside Closet) I'm well aware of this...Oh hello Rinoa, hello Seifer what are you doing in he...ooooh.

END

Cloud: I don't need the Lecture

Barret: Ahh Friggin'....

Sephiroth: Y'know Cloud you sh..

Director: Cut, cut, cut! What are you doing Sephiroth?!

Sephiroth: I, I'm talking to Cloud.

Director: You aren't in this scene!

Sephiroth: I, I thought, i could be,a,a, a background character in AVALANCHE?

Director: NO! you fool.

Sephiroth: -teary eyed- I only, I was just...

Director: You've ruined the entire premise for my film!!!

Sephiroth: -teary- Look, I'm sorry.. -wipes eyes-

Cloud: Oh you really are an idiot, aren't you?

Barret: Thats the film reel!

Sephiroth: -crying- Waahaa, waaah !!!

-runs off-

Vincent: Oh was i supposed to be filming now?
Cloud:

Cloud: Tifa... I never made Soldier. I was too scared... and what I really wanted... what I really wanted was to be...

A LUMBERJACK!

*music begins to play*

Cloud: With my best buddy by my side, we'd sing, sing, SIIIIIIIIIIING!

I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK, I sleep all night and I work all day!

*the rest of the male members of the party jump in*

Chorus: He's a lumberjack and he's OK, he sleeps all night and he works all day!

Cloud: I cut down trees, I eat my lunch, I go to the lavatree! On Wednesdays I go shopping, and have buttered scones for tea!

Chorus: He cuts down trees, he eats his lunch, he goes to the lavatree! On Wednesdays he goes shopping, and has buttered scones for tea!

Cloud: I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK, I sleep all night and I work all day!

Chorus: He's a lumberjack and he's OK, he sleeps all night and he works all day!

Cloud: I cut down trees, I skip and jump, I like to press wild flowers! I put on women's clothing, and hang around in bars!

Chorus: He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps, he likes to press wild flowers. He puts on *make faces of disgust* WOMEN'S CLOTHING!? AND HANGS AROUND IN BARS!?

Cloud: I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK, I sleep all night and I work all day!

Chorus: He's a lumberjack and he's OK, he sleeps all night and he works all day!

Cloud: I cut down trees, I wear high heels, suspenders and a bra! I wish I'd been a girlie, just like my dear papa!

Chorus: He cuts down trees, he wears *now utterly disgusted* HIGH HEELS!? SUSPENDERS!? AND A BRA!? *walk off stage muttering to each other.*

Cloud: I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK, I sleep all night and I work all day!

Chorus: *jumping back on stage* He's a lumberjack and he's OOOO KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAY!
HE SLEEPS ALL NIGHT AND HE WORKS ALL DAY!

Cloud runs up to a giant dragon and cuts it three times with his sword, then jumps back to position.

Director: Cut! Cloud, did you not even read the script? You have the 4X-Cut materia equipped! That means you cut four times. Now, let's try it again.

Cloud runs up to a giant dragon and cuts it three times with his sword, then pauses for a moment to count with his fingers. He then cuts the dragon twice more and jumps back, smiling victoriously at the director.

Director: Cut! Dammit, Cloud!

Aeris: Go get some rest Cloud

Cloud: Whoa screwy dream...

-Leaves room-

_Stomp stomp_

Director: What was that?!

Cloud: I was getting out of the house...

Director: Read the lines...

Cloud: Oooh.

-Cloud gets into position, and leaves room-

Cloud: Whilst Sneaking Cloud makes his way to the stairs

-Stomp Stomp-

Director: Jesus Chri......

*end of game scene after meteor hits*

Cloud: wow! look at all the pretty colour!

Tifa: idiot! Thats the lifestream!

cloud: *stupid grin*

Sephiroth: *walks in* did I miss anything?

Director: CUT!!!! *points at sephiroth* Your supposed to be dead!

Sephiroth: ...oh

Barret: I pity the fool who doesn't follow the script!

Tifa, cloud, and Sephiroth: look! Its Mr. T!!! *huggles Barret*

Director: *sobs uncontrolably*

In the Coffee room,

Sephiroth: So are you free this Saturday, Tifa?

Tifa: I don't kno..

Cloud: Foo', Tifa's ma' bitch!

Sephiroth: Go steal someone's life, Cloud... Anyway, Ti..

Cloud: Thats it you're going down!

Sephiroth: Oh really?! Bring it!!

Barret: Wha'the'f'?! Wass goin' on fools?!

Cloud: Sephiroth is eying my girl!

Barret: Sephiroth, I've heard enuff outta ya'

Sephiroth: Oh you wants some action, eh? Come on then!

Vincent: Hey Barret, buzz off, yeah? Leave this to the big boys.

Barret: Friggin' Stay outta this!

Cait Sith: Bah, don't know what you have to say on the subject, Barret when was your last date

Vincent: This conversation is for ages Six and up, chubby. You don't got a woman!

Cloud: Oh yeah?! Wheres your girl, eh? Oh yes under a frickin' coffin!

Sephiroth: I'm suprised Tifa even remembers you! The last time you met her, you had Black hair and went by the name of Zack!

Cloud: Hey! Tifa said she doesn't care about that!

-During the ruckus-

Tifa: Wanna see if Squall and Seifer are available?

Aeris: Sure, why not?