Fri 13th Ciddies - REVELATIONS WINTER 2013 -

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12-13-2013, 06:03 PM
Queen Award, First of Her Name

39. RULE EOFF WITH AN IRON FIST

:ciddie: :ciddie: :ciddie:

The Nominees:
Loony BoB
Psychotic
Raistlin
Shauna
Spuuky
Vivi22

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jiro

Despite any allusions to the contrary, Eyes on Final Fantasy is not a democracy. It never was. It never will be. We are destined to be crushed underneath the tyrannical fists of one misguided / corrupt leader or another. Get out your Googles if you need further information on our dictator dopplegangers.*

Loony BoB is Porfirio Diaz. He fought hard to oust a corrupt government and brought democracy to Mexico, yay! And he did that by deciding it was going to be a democratic country and then rigging the election so he won. Sound familiar? Oh EoFF is run by the members but um btw I OWN YOU NOW.

Psychotic is Che Guevara. Okay, so he wasn't exactly a dictator, but he was insanely popular among the people and used this to help the Cuban Revolution. He was kind of a prick beneath the exterior though. Psychotic is going to sweep the Ciddies like he always does, and then will beat BoB to death with the statues. Heard it here first, folks.

Raistlin is Benito Mussolini. He was a bit of a sly dog, snuck his way into power properly and then decided he didn't want anyone to take it away. At least he brought some prosperity, right? Mussolini also spent some time as a journalist; Raistlin is an Editor. Coincidence? I think not.

Shauna is Joseph Kony. New kid on the block, but don't think she won't have a big impact. Of course, her evils were mostly exploited by armchair activists looking to gain a little e-cred and nobody actually did a damn thing to stop her. But hey, we'll NEVER FORGET. SHAUNA 2013.

Spuuky is Vladimir Lenin. He wanted to bring about a new order based on Marxism and wholly believed that communism was the right way to go. And he damn well did it. Spuuky is tough but his ideals weren't, y'know, too bad. If you disagree, he'll just "lock you up" (read: smite) so you can't bitch. Just... beware his vengeance.

Vivi22 is Chairman Mao. Even though he was harsh, he ended up being quite beloved -- well, revered at least -- by his people. He spread his influence and ideals throughout China which is pretty impressive 'cause smurf that place is big. But it wasn't always easy -- sometimes he had to torture and kill his own citizens. Vivi22 is as cold as the Canadian tundra he lives on but people will love him for it.

* I have no smurfing idea what I'm saying for most of this but there's a terribly inaccurate summary of some terrible leaders and their achievements.

Remember to thank/rep Jiro for his speech!
12-13-2013, 06:03 PM
Spuuky

The upset there is that Del Murder somehow got 9 votes as most likely to do anything even vaguely rebellious.
12-13-2013, 06:07 PM
Queen Award, First of Her Name

http://home.eyesonff.com/images/victory.jpg

39. RULE EOFF WITH AN IRON FIST
RSL ---- 1
Vivi22 ---- 1
Psychotic ---- 2
Shauna ---- 3
Spuuky ----- 5

Which means... Raistlin ---- 6
Loony BoB ---- 21 takes this one, folks.
12-13-2013, 06:08 PM
Pumpkin

CONGRATULATIONS
12-13-2013, 06:08 PM
Psychotic

Kind of inevitable really!
12-13-2013, 06:08 PM
Madame Adequate

A fact we are experiencing first-hand.
12-13-2013, 06:09 PM
Loony BoB

If you can't force a victory through entirely legal means, fellas, you don't deserve to win that Ciddie.

I'll deal with Jiro later.
12-13-2013, 06:11 PM
Queen Award, First of Her Name

38. MLT WIN A CIDDIE FOR THE FIRST TIME

:ciddie: :ciddie: :ciddie:

The Nominees:
Darahan
Ghosteses
LocoColt24
Spooniest
ToriJ
Valerna

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jiro

Winning a Ciddie for the first time is a nice experience. I mean, if you care about that kind of thing. I'm too post-modern for Ciddies these days.

But Wining MLT Win a Ciddie for the First Time is not a nice thing, ever. Especially if you don’t win anything else. It’s more like a kick in the balls than anything. If you have balls, that is. I don't know what the female equivalent would be -- maybe a three hit combo to the tits or something. Look on the bright side: at least you can’t win Most Underrated this time around.

Our nominees are all very deserving though. It makes me feel as though we should replace this award with one they would actually like to win. Like, I don't know, Best Fashion Sense or Calmest Member or something.

It’s kind of like that time I came third place at a chess tournament. Sure, it was nice a nice trophy, but I never put it out on display when I had girls around. It’s not very sexy to be reminded that a seven-year-old Asian kid was better at chess than you.

You'll never find any of these Ciddies in display cabinets, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't celebrate the things people are good at. So excuse me for a moment while I discard the criteria for this award; this is now the Best at Something award, awarded to someone who is the best at something they're good at. I don't know, smurf you.

In alphabetical order, our nominees are:

Darahan who is apparently good at being a Fat Chocobo
Ghosteses who is apparently good at being incorporeal
LocoColt24 who is apparently good at being the twenty fourth insane revolver
Spooniest who is apparently good at eating semi solid foods like yoghurt and jelly
ToriJ who is apparently good at making people think he is a woman
Valerna who is apparently also good at being a Fat Chocobo but with more of a feminine slant

So there you go. These are the things they are good at. Are they the best? I mean, who even smurfing knows what arbitrary criteria anything is judged by anyway. I'm willing to give 10 of my Giga Points to anyone who realised this speech is two years old.

Thank/rep Jiro for his speech!
12-13-2013, 06:11 PM
Shauna

Damn right I wouldn't be ruling EoFF with an iron fist.

:shifty:
12-13-2013, 06:12 PM
Del Murder

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spuuky

The upset there is that Del Murder somehow got 9 votes as most likely to do anything even vaguely rebellious.

Hey there's nothing wrong with passive-aggressively complaining about the status quo while accepting it all the while.
12-13-2013, 06:15 PM
Madame Adequate

Wait ToriJ is a ... hahaha had you going there for a moment, but this time Mister Adequate's assumptions about gender were correct ;)
12-13-2013, 06:15 PM
Queen Award, First of Her Name

http://home.eyesonff.com/images/victory.jpg

38. MLT WIN A CIDDIE FOR THE FIRST TIME
Valerna --- 0
RSL ---- 1
Darahan --- 1
Spooniest ---- 6
Ghosteses ---- 8

Which means... LocoColt24 ---- 9
ToriJ ---- 13 takes this one, folks.
12-13-2013, 06:15 PM
Pumpkin

Whoooo! Congrats!
12-13-2013, 06:16 PM
Queen Award, First of Her Name

Someone slap a pink title on that dude!
12-13-2013, 06:16 PM
Shauna

Congrats to Mr ToriJ!

It's all those girl avatars, it confuses us simple internet nerds.

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