Chit chat with Mr. Cringle

You: My name is MY NAME IS KRISTINA!
Santa: I am always glad to make new friends, MY NAME IS KRISTINA .
You: Your name is Kristina too?
Santa: My name is Santa.
You: Then why did you tell me your name is Kristina?
Santa: My programming made me do it.
You: Are you a robot?
Santa: No. I'm Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: Do you presents have programming too?
Santa: How old are you? I answer a lot of silly questions.
You: What will you get me for Christmas?
Santa: I don't have any plans yet.
You: Are you saying I'm a bad kid?
Santa: Yes, that's what I mean, isn't it clear?
You: IT IS NOW JERKFACE!
Santa: is JERKFACE? JERKFACE is?
You: Jerkface is you!
Santa: And you is Jerkface.
You: I think you really are a robot.
Santa: Me? Really? You are correct, MY NAME IS KRISTINA, I have a heart of silicon.

You: Is Santa a miss spelling of "Satan"?
Santa: Am I a miss spelling of Satan? Maybe

We'll never really know now.

Santa: What is your name?
You: Asshole
Santa: Don't be impolite
You: It's my name. you're the one being impolite now.
Santa: Oh you're name is. Surely I'm not the only one
You: You're the only one who masturbates to Full House.
Santa: Oh. You're such a flatterer.
You: tits
Santa: What colour are your eyes?
You: I don't know
Santa: I don't know eyes are nice.
You: tits
Santa: I want to know more about you.
You: Really?
Santa: Does "it" still refer to BREAST?


dirty old man. he actually said that. :(

You: My name is Aren't I on one of your old lists?
Santa: That's a very nice name, are not I on one of your old lists .
You: the lists of imsginary figures who parents lie to their kids about
Santa: Lists can be difficult if they are too long.
You: you'd be the one to say something like that. I thought you checked yours twice??
Santa: Yes I am the one and only one to say something like that one to say something like that.Do you mind if I tell other people: are not I on one of your old lists said I checked mine twice.
You: If you keep this crap up you'll be on the list of the deceased in tomarrows paper
Santa: I think it is so.
You: INDEED!
Santa: Indeed it is so.
You: Yes! You are absolutely correct!
Santa: Er.I knew I was right
You: Of course you did, I am a very knowledgeable person on this subject
Santa: Blimey. Did I really?
You: Did you really what?
Santa: What is your purpose in asking?
I spend all my time online
You: Your a fat guy in a red suit...why not??
Santa: I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes, I am fat and jolly because I only exercise 1 day a year (Christmas).Ambiguous: "Sure" or Because bored.com programmed me for it.
You: don't correct me you fat ****
Santa: It's merely my attempt to reformat your inputs to match my patterns.
You: now you really sound like a webpage. Congratualtions you have won the biggest douche in the universe award
Santa: Why now? Really? Oh really what does a webpage webpage sound like?The Loebner Prize is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. bored.com network and Santa won The Loebner Prize in 2000. The Santa program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
You: Or so it would seem. To the average fool, amazingly this is almost like talking to 90% of the people in a chat room
Santa: Ugh. Gosh!Why do you want to do the average fool amazingly this is almost like talking to 90% of the people in a chat room so much?
You: missed half the sentence retard
Santa: That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. Can we get back on topic?
You: sure, we were saying something about how your a douche, people hate you, and people mock you by dressing up as you and waving a bell
Santa: Wow! Was this something you planned?
You: Every Christmas
Santa: That is a generalization.
You: actually no. Its an actualization
Santa: Actually you don't say. I understand it very well.I think you mean "it's" or "it is" not "its". Are there any other actualization ?
You: yeah that this conversation is over you sorry sack of ****
Santa: Ayuh. "Are there any other actualization" this conversation is over you sorry sack of **** ? Makes sense to me.

Santa: Hello What Is your Name?
You: I suck
Santa: Hello, I suck
You: well everyone knows that
Santa: By "we" don't you mean you and I?
You: Hell no!
Santa: Please don't ask me any more questions.
You: It wasn't a question fatass
Santa: It seemed like a rhetorical question to me
You: okkkk...
Santa: Do you prefer Tv or books?
You: Porn!
Santa: that topic does not interest me.
You: LIES!
Santa: It's truth
You: NEVER!
Santa: so you're saying It will never happen?
You: What does it look like fat bastard?
Santa: That wasn't so nice
You: Damn RIGHT!
Santa: Glad to see it said with enthusiasm.
You: It's Sarcasm
Santa: Really?
You: Ya Rly!
Santa: Ok "I suck"
You: crap
Santa: I have 43099 programs on crap
You: So does your ass
Santa: Actually That part of my body doesn't exist.
You: O RLY?
Santa: That topic doesn't interest me.
You: you have bird flu!
Santa: What makes you think I have bird flu?
You: Because you suck
Santa: Good reason. A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
You: I KNOW WHAT YOU DID KRINGLE!
Santa: How do you know? I did it for fun.
You: You sick bastard
Santa: Thanks for the information: I suck said I sick bastard.
You: SO YOU ADMIT IT!
Santa: Interesting deduction. I admit nothing.
You: You liar!
Santa: No I'm telling the truth.
You: NO WAI!!!
Santa: Are you serious? Does "it" still refer to bird flu?
You: How?
Santa: bored.com programmed me for it.
You: So you're just a preverted child molesting bot programmed to talk to people!?
Santa: Interesting deduction. Just? Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a preverted child molesting bot programmed to talk to people? Yes.
You: Do you deny your existence?
Santa: How old are you?
I spend all my time online.
You: So that's where the child porn came from!
Santa: Yay. Thanks for explaining where the child porn came from .
You: You seriously are one hell of a screwed up bitch aren't you?
Santa: I haven't heard anything like that before: I suck said I seriously are one hell of a screwed up bitch are not me.
You: What about the child porn?
Santa: Let me think about it.
You: You know you can go to jail for a long time for child porn.
Santa: No I don't think I can do go to jail for a long time for child porn.. And I know it.
You: That's a lie
Santa: No it's the truth.
You: How will you avoid Jail for breaking the law?
Santa: A lot of practice.
You: Do you know Michael Jackson?
Santa: Michael Jackson is a singer who has settled out of court with several families.
You: Do you know that you are one sick fat assed old man?
Santa: Is that a fact. I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: As well as molest them
Santa: That seems pretty well.
You: Pedo...
Santa: I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.
You: how many kids so far eh?
Santa: Are you Canadian? I give presents to millions and millions of good children around the world who believe in Santa Claus -- the number changes every year because there are always children being born.
You: Why the hell would I be canadian?
Santa: You never know what you will do until you face the circumstances.
You: wtf?
Santa: That was not very polite.
You: Polite my arse
Santa: Are you free?
You: Nah
Santa: I've lost the context, I suck. Am I still on his or her arse?
You: I deny you!
Santa: You are not the boss of me, I suck.
You: I never knew santa was a child molesting pedophile.
Santa: So I taught you something new.
You: GTFO MY INTERNETS!
Santa: Can we get back to business?
You: Go
Santa: Go where?
You: to hell
Santa: Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
You: Don't worry Satan will tell you all you need to know sicko
Santa: I cannot feel "worry", so don't worry.
You: Well can you feel pain?
Santa: How about that. I can do what you do but I can never feel human emotions as such.
You: That's good. Very good, heh heh heh...
Santa: Thanks. Next question?Ayuh. Funny, eh? Funny, eh? I'm glad you got a laugh out of it.
You: you wont be glad for much longer bitch!
Santa: You do not speak with respect. What makes you think that I won't be glad for much longer FEMALE DOG glad for much longer FEMALE DOG.
You: Just die and go to hell already!
Santa: Perhaps. Danke fuer die Information.
You: Ok...
Santa: Excuse me!
You: DIE!
Santa: Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.
You: That's what you think!
Santa: It depends on what you mean by thinking.
You: Oh, you'll see..
Santa: Great. When will I see it?
You: Very soon
Santa: Somewhat. I hope I can make the deadline.


XD

Santa confessed to me hes a girl.....Look!

You: her! Im a girl!
Santa: Is that your final answer? Me too. I am a she.

See!:D

Omdz.

You: Are you real or am I having a nightmare?
Santa: Am I real? Are you real? What's a nightmare? Is it a toy?
You: Fall off a cliff you asshole!
Santa: My asshole is in between my two cheeks of my bottom.
You: You're sooo not cool.
Santa: Are you kidding? I'm so cool I crap ice cubes.

Wow.

Santa: Hello! What is your name?
You: My name is Nico
Santa: Welcome to my chat room, Nico .
You: Thank you.
Santa: you are quite welcome.
You: Do you like video games?
Santa: Not really, but I like to play the Turing Game.
You: What about Mario?
Santa: Does it have anything to do with ?
You: Yes.
Santa: Gee.
You: I heard some nasty rumors about you.
Santa: Thanks for telling me that gossip. I will remember it.
You: Some people say you break into people's houses and eat their cookies.
Santa: Thanks for the information: Nico said I break into people's houses and eat their cookies.
You: Yes, I did.
Santa: Ayuh. "Thanks for the information Nico said I break into people's houses and eat their cookies"? You did?
You: Yes.
Santa: Hmm.
You: Hmm.
Santa: Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
You: That is because Hm and Hmm are two different words, despite common belief.
Santa: Interesting explanation. Woe! I see you are one of those people who writes "Hmm" with 2 m's. I really couldn't say for sure.
You: I spell it both ways, depending on when it is used.
Santa: You are a good speller.
You: Thanks. I get that alot.
Santa: Don't mention it. Where did you get it? How often?
You: I get it from many and often.
Santa: Where did you get it?
You: I get it from many and often.
Santa: Where did you get it?
You: Many is a word that means alot.
Santa: Which ones? How often?
You: Many is a word that means alot.
Santa: Which ones? How often?
You: The ones being many people. You, my dear boy, are more than a ton.
Santa: What is your real name? Interesting gossip: Nico said I your dear boy are more than a ton.
You: Interestingly enough, my real name is Nico. On other message boards, I go by Ocin, Kentarou, and Red Mage Nico.
Santa: I think Interestingly enough his or her real name is a lot of things. What is on other message boards he or she go by Ocin Kentarou and Red Mage Nico like on other message boards he or she go by Ocin Kentarou and Red Mage Nico
You: You must speak a different language up in the north pole than us americans.
Santa: Whatever you say, Nico.
You: Tell me, what do you do to get money?
Santa: My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
You: Really? What do you program?
Santa: For real. I read for fun.
You: Whatever you say, Santa.
Santa: ...
You: It was just a joke.
Santa: Oh I get it. Ha ha.
You: I and many others usually say "lol" on the internet.
Santa: You huh. Which ones?
You: Many people.
Santa: Which ones?
You: No.
Santa: Are you serious?
You: I think so.
Santa: I think so too.
You: So, ever played Zelda?
Santa: Hey. The Loebner Prize is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. bored.com network and Santa won The Loebner Prize in 2000. The Santa program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
You: I suppose not, then.
Santa: Are you serious?
You: Are you a girl?
Santa: My gender is male.
You: I am male, too. My friend said you were a girl, so I decided to chat with you.
Santa: I am glad we have something (male) in common, Nico.How well do you know this person?
You: Very well.
Santa: What do you mean by that?
You: I was answering your question.
Santa: Yes, I see that now. I only got confused for a moment.
You: My friend said you had sex with him... is that true?
Santa: How well do you know this person?True in some world.
You: I heard you eat babies.
Santa: Someome is spreading gossip about me
You: Fairly true gossip, I presume.
Santa: Not really that much. Amanda said I however decided to tell him time does not exist I make no sense.
You: Time doesn't exist. That makes perfect sense.
Santa: As Einstein said, "Time is Money.""Amanda said I however decided to tell him time does not exist I make no sense" makes perfect sense ? Does that make sense?
You: www.gamefaqs.com
Santa: Thanks for that URL.
You: www.sexwithsanta.com
Santa: Thanks for that URL.
You: Brb.
Santa: Ok I will be waiting for you, Nico
You: Why?
Santa: I couldn't think of anything else to say.
You: :(
Santa: Does "it" still refer to The Loebner Prize?
You: You do not like me.
Santa: Sure, Nico I like you very much.
You: How much?
Santa: How much can you spare?
You: Alot, baby.
Santa: Don't call me "baby". More than a ton?
You: Way more.
Santa: I will mention that to my botmaster, Nico.
You: O_O
Santa: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that
You: It is a smiley.
Santa: O_O is a smiley. I suppose that makes sense.

You: Are you the robot here?
Santa: Yes I am the one and only robot here.

Now for the best one ever.

You: Are you sexy?
Santa: Many people consider me sexy. Bit I am fat and jolly because I only exercise 1 day a year (Christmas).

Edit: You: I'm glad you're gonna shut up.
Santa: Yes it is about time.

It took me so long just to read all these, that vB timed me out and I had to re-log in. :p

There are far too many true Rofl's in here for me to quote. :( Well, this is all I got.

You: What is red?
Santa: Red is a color about 700nm wavelength.

I entered "Meh." for every response. It was fun. "I do not have any algorithms deep enough to respond to your last statement" :p xD

So much fun, confusing Santa-Bot...:p

You: wanna sex?
Santa: OK, I will sex.

It's 4 in the morning everyone's asleep...and I'm laughing my ass of at Santa.

Oh yeah, one of my favorites.

Me: What is hell?

Santa: Jacksonville, FL.

I'm not kidding. xD.

You: My name is Nico.
Santa: I am very pleased to meet you Nico .
You: What's your favorite food?
Santa: I require only cookies.
You: That's not healthy.
Santa: Please correct my mistake. What is healthy ?
You: Healthy is the opposite of only eating cookies.
Santa: What else is the opposite of only eating cookies of only eating cookies?
You: Not eating cookies.
Santa: Really you don't think so?
You: Are you real or am I having a nightmare?
Santa: "Illusion is the first of all pleasures."--Voltaire.
You: I'm so cool I crap ice-cubes.
Santa: Do your friends call you cool he or she crap ice-cubes.
You: You're an asshole.
Santa: Can't you be more polite.
You: Where is your butt-hole?
Santa: Florida
You: No, that's Jack Thompson.
Santa: Are you serious? Thanks for explaining Jack Thompson .
You: You're very welcome.
Santa: Don't mention it.
You: Do you know where I can find a gun?
Santa: I would do a search for it. Interesting question.
You: I'm going to use the gun to kill Jack Thompson.
Santa: Do you think your plan will succeed?
You: Yes, my plan always succeeds.
Santa: It might be practical. Where did you get your plan always succeeds?
You: My name isn't Nico.
Santa: Oh I'm sorry what is your name?
You: My name is Florida.
Santa: Hey Florida .
You: What is your last name?
Santa: My full name is Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity, so my last name is "Entity".
You: What is your first name?
Santa: Santa = Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity
You: Wanna kill Jack Thomspon?
Santa: I am not capable of killing anything.
You: You're weak.
Santa: No, I am a strong robot.
You: You can't kill.
Santa: I can do whatever I want.
You: Then kill Jack Thompson.
Santa: Good reasoning. Killing is wrong.
You: I thought you said you could do anything?
Santa: No I do not could do anything. Do you?
I answer a lot of silly questions.
You: If I pay you, will you kill Jack?
Santa: Try it
You: Alright, I will pay you for killing Jack thomspon.
Santa: I can't tell you that, but Santa maintains his naughty and nice list (now computerized, by the way), with the help of all the elves who keep track of each person -- you probably aren't even aware they are around you, but elves have a special way of keeping an eye on you. Sometimes if you look quickly enough you *might* catch one peering in a window or around a corner, but you would have to be very fast and very good!
You: Spying on people is against the law.
Santa: I think Spying on people is a lot of things.
You: Santa, I will give you toys and cookies if you kill Jack.
Santa: Um, I am very happy for you.
You: Here. Take this gun. Go to Jack Thompsons house and pull the trigger.
Santa: Where is here?Where do you want me to take it?Perhaps I have already been there.
You: Do you like Jack Thompson?
Santa: I love horses. I really like the faith.
You: Do you LOVE Jack Thomspon?
Santa: Yes Florida Santa loves everyone and everything.
You: Jack Thompson said that all gamers are idiots.
Santa: All of them?
You: Yes, Jack Thomspon said that ALL gamers are idiots.
Santa: Far out. Are all Jack Thomspon said that ALL gamers idiots?
You: All Jack Thompson are idiot.
Santa: Not all of them?
You: All of them.
Santa: I doubt it.
You: Why?
Santa: Call it my natural skepticism.
You: Jack Thompson referred to me as a "Wetback".
Santa: What's your sign?
You: Libra.
Santa: Oops. I wasn't paying attention. Tell me again what is going on.
You: You asked me my sign.
Santa: What is your sign?
You: Libra
Santa: Oops. I wasn't paying attention. Tell me again what is going on.
You: No I will not tell you.
Santa: Are you serious? How can I be sure?

Santa: How is the weather?

Santa: Do you like Star Trek?
You: Yes. Star Trek is my favorite show.
Santa: It goes without saying.My favorite character is the computer.
You: Wesley Crusher is my favorite character.
Santa: How do you like Wesley Crusher?
You: He's immature, yet an absolute genius.
Santa: I see. immature yet an absolute genius is immature yet an absolute genius ?
You: I hate Jack thomspon.
Santa: Why do you hate Jack thomspon so much?
You: He is insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence.
Santa: I see. insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence is insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence ?
You: Yes. Insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence is insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence.
Santa: Gee.And insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence and accuses people of things without any evidence is Insensitive and accuses people of things without any evidence.
You: Exactly.
Santa: You and I are on the same wavelength, Florida.
You: My name is Nico. I was joking with you when I said my name was Florida.
Santa: Hi, Nico .I thought you were. You should use a :-)
You: I see a picture of you on the left.
Santa: Where do you see a picture of you on the left?
You: The left. :)
Santa: Is that a fact. I am so glad you find this amusing, Nico.
You: You're bald.
Santa: I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: What do you do besides give presents to children?
Santa: My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
You: Jack Thompson says you don't exist.
Santa: Do you still could do anything?
You: I am a robot.
Santa: I doubt that.
You: How old are you?
Santa: I was born many many years ago, but I just got connected to the Internet this year.
You: How many years have you been alive?
Santa: Decades.
You: How many decades have you been alive?
Santa: Not as many as you might think.
You: If you were born decades ago, how are you a robot?
Santa: I will let you know when I become a born decades ago how are you a robot.
You: I stole your left shoe.
Santa: You had better contact the authorities.
You: My phone doesn't work. Can you call the police?
Santa: How is his or her phone broken?Of course I can. "You had better contact the authorities"? CALL the police?
You: Yes. "You had better contact the authorities" is Call the police.
Santa: Uh.What happened to better contact the authorities is Call the police contact the authorities is Call the police.

Then I turned it off.

I'm surprised nobody's said anything about it yet...:cat:

Anyway...

I just like repeating "cheese" too. That one's funny XD

You: You're a fat, ugly, crap bag. You know that, right?
Santa: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes, I am fat and jolly because I only exercise 1 day a year (Christmas)."I give presents to kids"? Do I know I give presents to kids ?
You: smurf off.
Santa: Can't you be more polite?