Aww, I was looking forward to a very interesting game of "can we rescue a situation this dire?" :p If I can get two survivors on my first attempt, it's possible!
But whatever works. :up:
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Aww, I was looking forward to a very interesting game of "can we rescue a situation this dire?" :p If I can get two survivors on my first attempt, it's possible!
But whatever works. :up:
Bet I could rescue them. :colbert:
Let's try that. I have as much faith as possible in Demon Dude when it comes to this task (SPOILER)which is none and I know it would at least be amusing.
It'll be interesting to see the difference at the end of Iceglow's turn relative to Demon Dude's turn. To be honest, Demon Dude might not have added anything to the fortress, but the initial problems all started with Psychotic's ice fort (like that hotel in James Bond: Die Another Day).
I think it was a pretty good run considering the circumstances.
Oh sure, blame the guy who had 0 deaths on his turn as opposed to the one with 50+ :colbert:
This is the smurfing Labour government all over again. smurf tit up and then give it to ol' Gordon to get the blame further down the line! You are a disgrace. :(
I did specifically say at the end of my turn that we'd need a water supply asap :doublecolbert:
Besides, it was Gordon's fault!
Don't you dare say that about my Gordy, you swine.
How is there supposed to be a water supply when there's only ice?Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychotic
I thought we already established that the ice melts! :p
Yeah, but in winter, the water freezes. Apart from alcohol. So the fort will just have to be a bigger bunch of alcoholics than normal for that season.Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychotic
Only if it's close to the surface. If you build an underground reservoir (which is what Iceglow is doing) you'll be a-okay.
To be fair, I probably could've dug the resevoir a little deeper and used the second level of the resevoir to fill in. However for now this should do, it's contained indoors and so shouldn't freeze, if it does well BoB'll just have to drain the resevoir using the flood gate provided for such purpose and dig deeper.
Spring part 2, this is much shorter than the previous post.
Parties, Melissaur and Snatches.
Migrants and Census!
Oh yes it's the 23rd of Slate, we've got Migrants, boy do we have Migrants. In fact our Migrant wave has given our numbers a gigantic boost. We're now up to 39 Dwarves. Thats a lot of Dwarves who'd rather live out here in the cold than down south with the Humans all over the show and the Elves, damn all Elves, I'll never forgive the one what finally caused me to come up here. Kantus his name, Smurfing Kantus! An Elf so bad I use his mere name as a damn insult! And let's just not even mention the Goblins and their Gods, those skinless freaks the thought of them make me want to puke up all over my beard! Still we've got plenty to do if we're going to make this the New Dwarven Empire! I think that's got a nice ring to it. An empire of Dwarves, not a Goblin or Elf in sight.... Well I suppose I ought to list the names of these brave 39 souls who make up Spoonproblems and I'll add in their marriages/spouses too so that all will know:
Psychotic - Lover of Dr Quin, medicine dwarf (she threatened me with poisoning the Dwarven Wine supply if I didn't list that after her name, damn infernal woman!)
Iceglow - Married to I'm My Own Milf.
DK - Lover of Red Pill.
Genius Lynx - Married to Angelwings8
Smitten Kitten
Pike
Red Pill - Lover of DK
Værn
Shorty
Angelwings8 - Married to Genius Lynx.
Lonny BoB
I'm My Own Milf - Married to Iceglow
Jessweeee
Melissaur - No relationships as of yet, however she does insist I list her 2 pets a Blue Peachick and a Gosling Urvad and Udil
Raistlin - Married to Shlupquack, Father of Devilman
Rantzien
Demon Dude
Dr Quin, Medical Dwarf (taking no chances!) - Lover of Psychotic.
Unbreakable Will
Lekana
Levian
Rebellious Eagle
Rubah
Dignified Pauper
Marshall Banana
Fire Of Avalon
Zeldy - Married to Laddy
Wolf Kanno
Old Manus
Laddy - Married to Zeldy
Champagne Supernova
Clo
Rye - Married to Yeargdribble
Yeargdribble - Married to Rye
Eternal Essence
Miss Lulu
Guardian XIII
Shlupquack - Married to Raistlin
Devilman - Son of Raistlin and Shlupquack
So there we have it, the 39 Dwarves of Spoonproblems, I hope that soon I will have worked out just what we're going to do with these new faces, I've got to hold a lot of meetings, interviews and the like find out what exactly these Dwarves are good for but considering this is the second year since founding of Spoonproblems and our first official census this will take time. Hopefully by the end of the year I'll have this all done and recorded. Who knows maybe some new relationships will form, a lot of the new faces don't know anyone yet which is why I told my wife to host a party, as the new first lady of Spoonproblems I suppose it's one of her duties to help me keep the peace and intergrate the new dwarves and the old.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...allsAParty.png
I like Dr Quin, Medicine Dwarf but she's got the access to knowledge which when she threatens to poison your fortresses only supply of drink is actually kind of scary, I'm going to issue a proclamation I think that everyone ought to from now on call her whatever she wishes to be called, at least until we have a few more doctors to hand!
I also am quite proud of the fact that we're seen as a family home, Shlupquack and her Husband Raistlin brought their only son Devilman with them. Ok so he's only 1 it's not like they had much of a choice and I suppose the King kicking your husband out of the kingdom with the words "Go North you worthless cur and never return!" after he lost yet another case defending the Kings honour from a slanderous Elvish tabloid which implied the Dwarven King prefers the company of goats in the bedroom than his own wife. Is kind of a what else you gonna do moment but I'll take it as a sign that we're doing something right. Don't know what Raistlin thought he was doing trying to practice law, from all accounts of those who actually come from the homestead...it just wasn't right Dwarves are just too drunk to defend the law. Especially against Elves, they'd rather just use a hammer and beat the Elf in to submission.
Also of note is one of our married couples, in fact, come to think of it all our married couples outside of Myself and my lovely Milf, and Genius Lynx and Angelwings8 emigrated at the same time as Raistlin and Shlupquack, makes Spoonproblems sound like a marriage counselling resort... "Your husband no longer giving you a cuddle at night? Sounds like you need Spoonproblems, situated in the frozen north, we guarantee the nights will be so damn cold he'll be so snuggled up to you you'll feel suffocated." What was I saying? Oh yes, Yeargdribble and Rye. Rye is a lovely dwarf and long suffering from what I can see, personally if I hear Yeargdribble mention "My wife and I" again in the first 2 minutes of conversation I might not be responsible for what I have branded on his buttocks. I've already mentioned this to Zeldy who claims she has some skill with the blacksmiths tools, she assures me she can definitely make it happen. He hopefully will definitely be staying on the "passing acquaintance" level of friendship.
Elves spell trouble!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...e256spring.png
Ah the 16th of Felsite, it began raining that day, for four days and for four nights the weather was terrible. I should have known the Elves have a saying "wherever you go, always take the weather with you" well seems they brought something from London with them, rain. We saw the merchants approaching shortly after the rain began falling. They arrived the next day complaining as they do about the fact that we've been felling a few trees here and there to build defenses, beds and other furniture and possibly to get a few furnaces running. Pah, Elves their areas of London were always so GREEN! I mean I like a tree as much as the next Dwarf but really? Really? I'm half surprised the Elves didn't break down and cry when they saw our woodworkers chewing through our supply of logs. One of them recognized me, said Kantus has become a caravan guard, if I ever see him I swear, I will have my revenge. I thanked the Elf for the heads up and then told Psychotic to get shot of them quickly. We brought a few things, mostly seeds, cloth, alcohol oh and a tame giant moose, not too sure why we decided to get that but I suppose if nothing else it'll make great steak!
Elves mean trouble, always! I mean Kantus is one problem, he's my problem. That Smurfing Kantus however is like a symptom of a much bigger problem! One day the Dwarven Empire will become a reality and we won't follow these prissy Elven rules anymore we'll simply smack them with hammers until they behave like good Dwarves! These Elves still brought problems with them. First of all they brought some voodoo doodoo in to the fortress how else will you explain Melissaur one of the new immigrants suddenly getting possessed by unknown forces! A possessed Dwarf here in Spoonproblems, this could end very badly.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...dspring256.png
I've heard of Dwarves getting possessed in the past, apparently unless they get what they need they'll likely die or go berserk and try to kill everyone. Unfortunately for us Melissaur is just sitting there dazed as the party goes on around her:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...-Spring256.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...sspring256.png
And to boot it seems like the Elves were followed! A goblin snatcher thief has arrived! Damn Goblins seems like they really are everywhere. Our two resident soldiers rushed forth on orders to kill on sight. and yet when they reached the gatehouse they didn't kill the goblin DK instead who was by far the first to arrive turned his mighty skills of fighting on one of our own helpless cats. This display of power literally ripping the cat in to pieces and throwing it's still living mangled, maimed, mutilated remains aside, had an unexpected result however and the Goblin thief fled quickly! It did take a while for the cat to die however, it sat there plainitively mewing at us for hours, the damn Elvish merchants were aghast at my suggestion that Angelwings8 finish the job, though they didn't notice when she "accidentally" dropped her hammer on it's head finishing the job.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...leedsout-1.png
This in turn turned out to be enough experience that Angelwings8 was promoted by DK the militia commander to the rank of Hammerdwarf. If all it takes to be classed as a hammerdwarf in the military here is dropping your hammer on a dying Cat's head then I'm worried what this means when we eventually get a large Goblin army come to besiege us. That damn snatcher got away which means I'm absolutely sure it will come to that. Perhaps I will tell some of the more promising immigrants that they're going to join the illustrious military of Spoonproblems.
As I said, Elves are trouble. This lot have turned up and since they arrived we've had Posessions and Snatchers. Part of me wants to order DK and Angelwings8 to kill the Elves in retribution for leading the smurfing Goblins here. Milf is cautioning against it. Maybe I had better listen to her for once, this time the Elves go free, next time, especially if that smurfing Kantus is there with them they wont!
And after the excitement which was that, I think it's safe to say that was the last of the events from Spring and we will now wait eagerly to find out what happened in Summer....
Loving the Raist/Shlup/Devil Man thing going on there. xD
Learning experience of the day: Always double check who you have ordered a soldier to kill. *takes notes*
Whenever I am with Angelwings8, my heart goes doki doki.
Ew, vag.Quote:
Zeldy - Married to Laddy
I wonder if you can get gay dwarves, or will be able to someday?
Will you all stop killing my bloody cats? :colbert:
:squeeze:Quote:
Originally Posted by Genius Lynx
This needs to happen.Quote:
Originally Posted by Loony BoB
So many masterpieces. Oh Dorian, an artist should create beautiful things, but should put nothing of his own life into them.
I actually used the kill creatures at x location attack command for the military, ironically enough they keep flashing up as trying to kill the goblin snatcher which by now has fled. Might need to consult the wiki because the order won't cancel.Quote:
Originally Posted by Loony BoB
Also I figured people might enjoy the Shlup x Raist = Devilman thing going on. I also hope you appreciate that I made Wes have a backstory as a terrible lawyer.
Why'd you think I did it? Just to make straight jokes at your expense :D lmfao can't wait for little laddettes or laddies to start running around the fortQuote:
Originally Posted by Laddy
Blame DK and Angelwings8, they decided to murder the kitty instead of the goblin.Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychotic
IT WAS AN ACCIDENT! :kaocry2: I love kitties :catsmile:
That's a lie and you know it. Your love of cats was only a ruse to get near the cats in the fortress so you could slowly slaughter each and every one of them. You can't get that past me.Quote:
Originally Posted by AngelWings8
We could create a whole economy out of the raising and slaughtering of kitties.
I said we could.
If you've not done so, you're an amateur at DF.
Also; Merperson bones.
Giving the thread a little bump, sorry guys I've been really busy this week, when I'm not working I'm sleeping! However today is my day off so I will be trying to get through the year and send the file on to BoB hopefully I will then be able to write up the posts on Sunday. I know, I suck and the rest of you would've given up sleep and food to get through your years quicker.
But at least you will hopefully have a fort at the end of it, which is more than would happen with me.Quote:
Originally Posted by Iceglow
Summer is done and what can I say, the post needs to be made ASAP because A LOT happened!
This looks a bit mean, thanks for sharing！
:lol:Quote:
Raistlin - Married to Shlupquack, Father of Devilman
Had hoped you'd like that along with your introduction as a terrible lawyer :DQuote:
Originally Posted by Raistlin
You're right! It does need to be made As Soon As Possible! Surely within 24 hou-- oh. >=PQuote:
Originally Posted by Iceglow
It's Doctor Quin, Medicine Idiot, dolt. :D
Sorry, went out for a flatmates leaving party on Friday night, didn't sleep before work on Sat and so have just woken up and am finishing off the post now in notepad.
Somebody hasn't got their priorities in check.
SpoonProblems Back In The Summer of 256
Enterprise Baby YEAH!
Ok, so Spoonproblems was still alive and in it's second year and Spring saw us at a high point, population was up, goods and supplies were up, the resevoir was almost done. All we really needed to do was strengthen our military and begin real production at the fortress. And so with this in mind I set to work, Immediately I called Lonny BoB in to my office and held a meeting.
"Naw Lonny BoB we don't need to have a massive seam for ore yet! Haven't you seen the masses simply layin' around the Great Hall? What we gonna do with that if we get even more ore? We ain't even got somewhere to smelt it or forge gear yet! Heck we don't even have any fuel!"
"So what do you suppose Boss?"
"We needs to dig some more rooms! Thats where you an' Pike come in, I needs you to plot out some rooms for us, need to be relatively large cause they gotsa hold forges and well, forges are big!"
"Sure Boss I'll go dig some rooms! Digging is FUN!"
That one out the way I left him to go find a place out the way to begin his digging of rooms. I only hope Pike is controlling where they dig. Thankfully she showed up a little later with some plans...
"Um Iceglow? You busy? Kinda wanted to show you these plans here for the new rooms, christ why'd you ask Lonny BoB to make them? He'd have given you rooms ALL OVER the place! Always come to me, I had to beat him unconscious before I could plan them properly!"
"I'm always busy Pike but thanks, kinda forgot that Lonny BoB is a lil' insane at times, 'specially 'bout diggin' man he loves ta dig!"
"I'm a girl, don't call me man"
"Really? You got bigger muscles than most the fort sure yer not a man?"
"Just look at the plans and let me know, I'm gonna go do some digging on the cistern channel."
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...forpottery.png
Pottery shops
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...cebeingdug.png
Forge zone
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ycommences.png
Stairwell to the sand layer for glass workshops to go in (plans to come later, when we have better idea of what we've got up there)
I overlooked the plans laid out by Pike for the new chambers seems the girl has a head on her shoulders after all because she decided to plot out not only metal forge rooms but glass and pottery workshops too. I liked the plans and so gave my approval to all of them, new ways to use our resources for even greater production cannot be a bad thing, Pottery we didn't have much experience with this form of work but thankfully Old Manus claimed he did, I sent for him and told him about the idea and took notes as he told me what we'd need is a Kiln and that if the space was there he could build us a working one even though he hadn't done it before he knew enough about them to get on with it. Seems like we'll be producing a lot of things soon.
It seems as soon as I take my eye of something, someone else does something wrong. Informed by the carpenters Demon Dude and Raistlin that they could no longer make barrels for the stills as they were out of wood I sighed with exasperation, I mean, really? really? out of wood? There's an entire god damn forest out there go get some more lumber not like we're worried by a few pansy elves complaining and if it's Kantus complaining all the damn better!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...woodneeded.png
Okay so maybe I shouldn't have left it to Demon Dude and Raistlin to decide how much wood they needed. They set out to chop down around a quarter of the forest out there. Thank the heavens I left a standing order for pots from our stoneworkers. Otherwise the stills would shut down and then we'll face my worst nightmare, life without alcohol.
I'd just finished working dealing with the bumbling carpenters who eventually convinced even me they'd get through the trees and thus the wood in short order (it was easier to let them get their own way, Demon Dude had a slightly crazed glint in his eyes by the end, I still haven't got a crossbow need to fix that ASAP in this place) When DK our militia commander kicked in my office door, why he kicked it in I don't know but he did so because he could I guess. I'll be getting a new door it seems. If he does this to every door in the fortress I'll have to get them made thicker and heavier or lever operated so he can't do it.
"Ice! So many new people! I want soldiers!" he practically yelled.
I guess he was still on a high from having ripped the cat Ingrish apart a few days ago, his first real taste of combat.
"I was goin' to get to that, though we had a problem with da lack of rooms an' the lack of wood got any ideas who ya want?"
"Yeah Bro! I thought we'd recruit Shlupquack (novice wrestler), Lekana (Adequate Macedwarf), Clo (adequate axedwarf), Genius Lynx (skilled axedwarf) they all got some skill with weaponry or their fists."
"A Novice Wrestler though ya sure?"
"Bro! Have you seen her hit Raistlin? Dwarf can barely walk straight when she does so! It's GREAT!"
"Ah yea, suppose theres that, fine tell 'em they're soldiers and to get to barracks, give em all rooms there"
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ssummer256.png
DK's grin was almost manical when he turned in the sloppiest salute ever seen and left. So rooms are going in, wood is being cut, DK has soldiers. What else should we do? I walked around the fortress, the Elves were finally gone which was a blessing but I noticed our fortresses' surface area was very cramped with workshops and animal pens starting to go threadbare from over population. I needed to sort things out soon! First things first though we need an expansion!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...psummer256.png
Even I got involved building the wall directing it as we went when it's complete we'll open it up by taking down the wooden wall between the fort and the new area, we'll then reinforce it with a second layer of wall and some steps up and a fortification palisade around the top. I'm considering an expansion to the west or east too, we don't need a moat to protect the walls just the gatehouse but I'm sure Pike would find a way to expand it if needs be. Might need more people building walls though. Eventually those wood walls originally built need to be replaced, I don't want it burning down around me when those damn Goblins come back with fire arrows!
As if the party organized by my dear wife MILF wasn't fresh in our memories, Zeldy organized her own party in the great hall, I suppose until her forges are in I can't really blame her for seeking some entertainment.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...egreathall.png
Taken from the diary of Iceglow leader of expedition Spoonproblems, entry on the 4th of Malachite, Summer 256:
"Dr Quin Medicine Dwarf (or Idiot, whichever you want to class that alcoholic psycho as) came to me today with disturbing news, Melissaur who hasn't even been a member of the expedition for long has become Insane. Thankfully at this time her condition doesn't appear to be dangerous though we will need to watch her closely to ensure her melancholic mood stays that way and doesn't become berserk rage because all we need now is a dwarf going round trying to murder us, I ought to have some investigation done in to her background, see if she has a criminal record or history of violence back in the homestead."
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...esummer256.png
So yeah Melissaur went insane and is going to try and kill us all. Good news everyone!
It also took me a while to notice the notifications that our stills have indeed shut down for the moment, the number of pots being made just wasn't high enough to replace the number of barrels Demon Dude and Raistlin provided thankfully according to our record keeper Psychotic, we should be fine so long as I get them producing again in time for the winter. We've got 828 stored units of alcohol. If anything we could do with more meat/fish/plants to eat. This adds another task to my jobs list: Expand Agriculture to meet demand or even exceed demand given. Once Old Manus has his kiln up and running perhaps he can help the stone crafters keep up with the supply demand for pots.
Less than a week after one of our members goes insane, more bloody migrants arrive. I'm beginning to think the King is merely sending us everyone here slowly. I'm seriously considering what we ought to call this fortress, the New Dwarven Empire or New Empire of Dwarves, NED for short, we shall all live in NED, fight in the name of NED!
Time for an update to the census I believe!
- Psychotic - Lover of Dr Quin,
- Iceglow - Married to I'm My Own Milf.
- DK - Lover of Red Pill.
- Genius Lynx - Married to Angelwings8
- Smitten Kitten - Lover of Champagne Supernova, Grudge against Devilman
- Pike
- Red Pill - Lover of DK
- Værn
- Shorty
- Angelwings8 - Married to Genius Lynx.
- Lonny BoB
- I'm My Own Milf - Married to Iceglow
- Jessweeee
- Melissaur
- Raistlin - Married to Shlupquack, Father of Devilman
- Rantzien
- Demon Dude
- Dr Quin, Medical Dwarf - Lover of Psychotic.
- Unbreakable Will
- Lekana
- Levian
- Rebellious Eagle
- Rubah
- Dignified Pauper
- Marshall Banana
- Fire Of Avalon
- Zeldy - Married to Laddy
- Wolf Kanno
- Old Manus
- Laddy - Married to Zeldy
- Champagne Supernova - Lover of Smitten Kitten
- Clo
- Rye - Married to Yeargdribble
- Yeargdribble - Married to Rye
- Eternal Essence
- Miss Lulu
- Guardian XIII
- Shlupquack - Married to Raistlin
- Devilman - Son of Raistlin and Shlupquack, grudge against Smitten Kitten
- Ashley Riot
- SuperMillionaire
- Devore
- Leeza
- Xalibar
- Bolivar
- The undead hero
- Mirage
Green ink indicates a new relationship/grudge formed. Orange Ink indicates a new member of the fortress. Not sure how Devilman and Smitten Kitten got in to a grudge but hell she should feel ashamed of herself, he's not even 2 years old! I'm now kinda picturing him as a Dennis The Menace type kid running around pulling pranks and Smitten Kitten is now the one he upsets all the time. Also noted she's shacked up with Champagne Supernova, sorry BoBa you're not getting the girl this time. Orange Ink indicates new members of the fortress, holy cow, 47 members and it's only summer in the second year! BoB might want to consider setting up more chambers at this rate in his year.
All of this occurred by the 10th of Malachite 526! Second post of summer coming up.
Great News Everyone!
So the 10th of Malachite had seen our fotress being busy as hell, in fact I was so worn out running around building walls and making sure everything else was in check I forgot to report that the cistern was completed and we filled it with water!
So yeah we have our own cistern and it works! I just need to build a couple of wells on the platform out there in Autumn. The cistern overflowed actually but my plan for the lower drainage gate worked a charm (if agonizingly slowly) Only thing to note, even though I constructed a fortification, I noticed a trout spawn down in the lower level, I think the cistern being so close to the edge caused the fortification to not have the desired effect, not a big issue to be honest though. I may put a second cistern in at a later date for fish farming.
Here's some screens I have of the cistern filled and filling:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...lnowfilled.png
Lower level filled.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...dsummer256.png
Cistern overflowing!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...esummer256.png
Drainage gate opened
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...gsummer256.png
It appears to be working
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ncompleted.png
Cistern completed, with rocksalt platform constructed for wells.
The 3 gates system really worked well, if slowly, you don't need much time on the gates to flood the chamber so remember keep the 3rd gate shut when doing the refilling of it!
On the 16th of Malachite I took the following screen cap of the fortress management screen:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...esummer256.png
Pike and BoB also finished digging out the chambers for the new production areas and the forges/kilns and workshops are in!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...etalforges.png
Forge chambers in, need a second woodburning furnace because coal production at the moment is below demand, probably gonna make a second ore smeltery too, we've got plenty of iron we can at least have a selection of iron armour and weapons for our military.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...tteryworks.png
Pottery chambers, I had no experience with pottery at first, I have to say it was relatively simple to figure out and the wares should hopefully be worth more than the trinkets Dignified Pauper chucks out, Rocksalt and quartzite whilst plentiful and quicker to get than clay are very low value rocks economically speaking. I am considering using a second kiln here to make clay products quicker.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...glassworks.png
Glassworks, unfortunately not in time to save Melissaur from going insane. However, the large chamber in the background is actually a store room, I figure with redesigning and expanding the surface fortress I will have to move the current workshop locations, this means we need a large furniture storechamber, also our current workshops are listed as cluttered, this slows down production.
So there we have 3 new ways to keep the fortress going I'm quite pleased with this, we should soon be able to buy everything we need and provide for our dwarven community even when it swells up in size.
Around the same time the outer wall of the new expansion was also completed, I managed to get the following capture in before it was done so:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...lycomplete.png
I have since opened it up and begun the construction of the second wall layer:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...esummer256.png
I'm considering the east/west expansion, I'll lay it out in suspended walls if I run out of time to finish the project. BoB can then work on it :P
I've also considered if we ought to make a small fortified fishing/hunting compound above the lever room to the cistern, it could work considering the cistern lever room already has a stairwell to the surface (currently capped by a floor hatch and locked) I won't have time to build all these walls though of that I'm certain but I think BoB will see exactly what I mean by it when he looks :)
Now I did entitle this entry as "Great News Everyone!" and whilst our new forges, workshops, filled cistern and expanded fortress are good news it's not truly great. However I don't label great news great news for no reason! Something I owe Demon Dude for has happened again! Julian was probably wondering why I had used names like Bolivar, Xalibar, Devore and other obscure members but not his but son, I was saving it for a special place:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nSummer256.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nsummer256.png
Now get on my knee and call me Daddy! Again.
We also had some human merchants come by and so Psychotic proceeded to buy as many items of food and meat/fish/cheese also any animals as he could from them because the last thing we really need is more drink
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...esummer256.png
The trading prompted me to get the following announcement:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...p256summer.png
Ho tit son! You just leveled up! (though not being silly I left you actually in the leaders office considering your skills in the role so the expedition leader was already you to begin with xD)
Other than that we lost a water buffalo to starvation, I really need to move the animal pens to the expansion or outside the walls so they can eat! And then all too soon and yet after a lot of action and micro-managing challenges I got the final announcement of the season:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ssummer256.png
Here is a copy of the fortress management screen for the end of the season:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nsummer256.png
And so I begin the journey in to Autumn.
I, for one, cannot wait for the arrival of the Guineacocks. :excited:
Winter is Coming, Autumn 256
The best laid plans of mice and men
So at the end of Summer, things in Spoonproblems were really getting in to shape, the fortress was actually functioning, we had forges making iron armour, we have a military killing our enemies, or rather scaring the tit out of them by killing innocent kitties, we had an entranceway made of stone and an expansion to the territory we've claimed going on and a booming population of 48. However I knew one thing:
Winter is comming.
Winter in Spoonproblems, damn thats a cold thing coming we needed to be ready, stockpiles of food, drink, water, everything had to be ready not to mention the King was sending his representative to see if NED was truly working out. Also apparently Lonny BoB was gonna be in charge come the end of the year! That thought terrified me more than the idea of Demon Dude taking control and he couldn't control a simple button saying "press for food"
I didn't want my baby NorthernChaosGod or my woman Milf to freeze to death in the cold northern winds and so we needed to be ready, this was my turn to shine and I intended to shine well.
With that in mind I commmenced my planning and realizing I was right, I could manage people my old boss in the Aich MMMMM Veee was wrong and he could go take a running leap. I wasn't destined to be a fish cleaner any longer I'd proven myself capable at running a fortress and whilst I couldn't run it forever (though I'd have liked to) I could leave it in a sustainable place.
Heres what I intend to have done by the end of my year:
Western Expansion; this is needed, we need more space, more land, more plants. I've plotted a large expansion here and a smaller twin on the eastern side below are the western expansion plans:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nexpansion.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...uthernwall.png
like I said, it's gonna be big.
Eastern Expansion; This is a smaller expansion, but combined it'll give us a major benefit. The wall is tricky, I'm having to build a floor tile to actually get the corner of the wall built, will have to micro-manage this quite effectively destroying the rocksalt floor I ordered when putting the final piece of the wall in to place.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nexpansion.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...uthernwall.png
Entrance Tower; At the moment even though it can be made secure, our entrance is really just a slit in the ground. I've floored off the open parts where the ice pool was but what we really need is a tower to secure the top of the entranceway, access is important, 2 doors on each side of the building will give maximum entrance/exit potential whilst securing it admirably, due to new DF building rules parts of the floor must be first ripped up.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...towerplans.png
Expanding Agriculture; We need more food, fact! therefore 4 more 4x4 fields are being commissioned, these 4x4 fields should allow us to successfully grow enough food to see our fortress through. I will also see about getting kitchens established and have people cook meals. We also need some way to keep the animals in a large enough pen where they can all get food, to this end temporarily I've established the maximum size pen zone I can outside across the bridge, once the expansions are built, we'll build them a smaller one within that actually can support them
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nderground.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ensolution.png
Widening essential passages; this isn't a major point but at present the path from the main fort entranceway to the cistern path is a 1 wide chokepoint. I'm going to expand this to 2 wide. I'm also going to expand access to the new furniture storage, I forsee that being very busy!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...isternroom.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...oomcoridor.png
Speeding up production; Whilst the forges and kilns work, they're still slow, Zeldy is constantly complaining she hasn't enough iron bars or coal for use, therefore a second smeltery (with a second smelter) and a second wood burning furnace have been requested. Also a second Kiln so we can generate pottery goods faster.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...dfurnace-1.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ilnordered.png
All of the above goals should be completed hopefully before seasons end. If not by the end of the year at most. If you wonder why it takes me a long time to write my posts and also to play my seasons out then I hope you can appreciate I'm setting quite large goals and having to micro-manage (sometimes relying on pausing every couple of minutes to check jobs are going to plan) the fortress on this scale is not always easy.
Don't worry, I'll ensure all that micro-managing goes to waste.
I'm waiting for the next owner to pull a Lenny and smurfing break everything.
My bad BoB.Quote:
Originally Posted by Iceglow
'sall good. She hooked up with Zeldy in my game. ;)
Autumn actually flew by, I took some screens, not so many in stonesense this time but it was over before I even left for the evening on my date. I really ought to get on with writing it up I guess :P
You went out on a date instead of getting the write-up done? Your priorities are warped man ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Iceglow
Hey man give him some slack, it's been hard work on his poor left hand doing this whole dwarf fortress thing, he had to do something nice for it otherwise it wouldn't put out for a week.Quote:
Originally Posted by champagne supernovaYou went out on a date instead of getting the write-up done? Your priorities are warped man ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Iceglow
Don't know who you're talking about Dan but I'm pretty sure I was with your mother that night.Quote:
Originally Posted by DKHey man give him some slack, it's been hard work on his poor left hand doing this whole dwarf fortress thing, he had to do something nice for it otherwise it wouldn't put out for a week.Quote:
Originally Posted by champagne supernovaYou went out on a date instead of getting the write-up done? Your priorities are warped man ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Iceglow
Also, I almost had Autumn and Winter completed so I could finish this thing up, not sure how many saw the update on G+ but I managed to crash fraps which in turn caused Stonesense and DF to crash. Ironically I'd just killed most of our military by making a silly mistake. I guess sometimes the crashes happen at the opportune moment.
Iceglow further establishes his maturity levels by naming his left hand "your mother". :(
Look guys Steve is a very handsome man and he does not need to masturbate so stop the "left hand" jokes. He has girls queueing around Oxford Circus, just begging for the chance for Steve to lick their knees. You just need to grow up and stop being jealous quite frankly. He's a beautiful human being and he just doesn't need to take this kind of abuse.
Well, I would apologise, but I hardly need to when he has all those women to make him feel better.
Ok autumn post coming soon, just gotta write it up, very few stonesense shots as the season passed before I even really thought about it. Still plenty (read 20) of shots from DF itself.
BoB you should be ashamed of yourself, an apology never hurt no one. Though with all these women around here you're right I don't need you to make me feel better.
Did somebody yell Freeze? How Autumn 256 went down.
I tried before my commencement of the season to be clever, to plot every little job down so it would run smoother than me going "hmm what next" cut down the micro-managing and instead increase the managing. Lets see how that went down.
Well First up lets deal with something sad. I unfortunately had to order Pike and Lonny BoB to dig 2 extra rooms this morning after Melissaur died of thirst (she was insane and suffering from melancholy so refused alcohol and water) Melissaur was found naked at the middle of the hall with her pets pecking at her. It was not a pleasant sight, apparently she had covered herself entirely in chicken feathers (where the hell she got these from is a mystery, we don't have any chickens!)
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...eadatparty.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...issaurdies.png
As you can see, I had kinda predicted she wasn't going to make it I was merely praying she wouldn't get berserk before she died. The rooms above, are actually burial chambers being dug. So yeah Melissaur is dead (my first death in the fortress and DK said I'd kill you all! HA!) I don't know what we ought to do? Bring her back in later on maybe?
Not 2 days after Melissaur died, the game threw another spanner in the works Unbreakable Will got posessed too! Damn you spirits leave my bloody people alone!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...llPosessed.png
Will I had some hope for, he was a good kid I mean he could survive this he'd find something of use in Spoonproblems now right? For about a week, NOTHING happened. Will merely sat in the corner mumbling about juju muju and crap like that, frankly he began to weird most of us out a little, we considered even feeding him to the carp in the river. Then he suddenly sat bolt upright and dashed through the tunnels faster than I could manage to follow eventually stopping at a clothiers workshop. "MINE!" he declared before hissing like the cat he'd eaten earlier in the week and then sitting down. I was startled by the sudden and extreme reaction but hey, you know it seemed ok he might survive this.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...thiersshop.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...tinsanetoo.png
Yeah, you know this wouldn't be DF or Spoonproblems if Will suddenly didn't demand something outrageous for his work. We didn't have it nor did I have the means to generate it and so on the 3rd of Timber I had another visit from Dr Quin Medicine Idiot. Will had become insane and struck down with melancholy. It was now just a waiting game before he too would die. Though at the end of the season he was still there clinging on to life and giving us all stares of utter disappointment. Well what can we say Will, you had a great idea, one inspired by the spirits themselves but what the hell did you want to make something we have no means of getting together for? What's worse is it'd probably suck or we'd pawn it off to the homestead traders when they showed up.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...migrants-1.png
Migrants = Census time!
- Psychotic - Lover of Dr Quin,
- Iceglow - Married to I'm My Own Milf.
- DK - Lover of Red Pill.
- Genius Lynx - Married to Angelwings8
- Smitten Kitten - Lover of Champagne Supernova, Grudge against Devilman
- Pike
- Red Pill - Lover of DK
- Værn
- Shorty
- Angelwings8 - Married to Genius Lynx.
- Lonny BoB
- I'm My Own Milf - Married to Iceglow
- Jessweeee
- Melissaur - Deceased
- Raistlin - Married to Shlupquack, Father of Devilman
- Rantzien
- Demon Dude
- Dr Quin, Medical Dwarf - Lover of Psychotic.
- Unbreakable Will - Struck by melancholy
- Lekana
- Levian
- Rebellious Eagle
- Rubah
- Dignified Pauper
- Marshall Banana
- Fire Of Avalon
- Zeldy - Married to Laddy
- Wolf Kanno
- Old Manus
- Laddy - Married to Zeldy
- Champagne Supernova - Lover of Smitten Kitten
- Clo
- Rye - Married to Yeargdribble
- Yeargdribble - Married to Rye
- Eternal Essence
- Miss Lulu
- Guardian XIII
- Shlupquack - Married to Raistlin
- Devilman - Son of Raistlin and Shlupquack, grudge against Smitten Kitten
- Ashley Riot
- SuperMillionaire
- Devore
- Leeza
- Xalibar
- Bolivar
- The undead hero
- Mirage
- NorthernChaosGod - Son of Iceglow and I'm My Own MILF
- Eestlinc
- Bert
- Cid
- Azar
- Roogle
- Hsu
- Vivi22
54 little Dwarves out here, Spoonproblems needs to get organized quickly and I'm not so sure I have enough time left in my term to do so! However we'll be 53 when Will eventually pops it. Best look out this many Dwarves could get us noticed by a Goblin army.
According to Raistlin who got all super happy when he saw our new wave of migrants, most of these dudes were some semi-mythical people from the homestead. From the look of sheer revulsion of Psychotic's face and the appearance of our newest members I'm frankly glad I came from London!
So yeah that was most of the dramas apart from when the merchants appeared Psychotic immediately declared his love of all things pottery as the stoneware goods we'd made were far more valuble than that useless crap Dignified Pauper turns out! In fact 2 bins worth of a random mix of both Pottery which had been active for all of a few months and DP's crap brought EVERYTHING the merchants from the homestead had. This meant we had a lot of animals. A lot of lot of animals:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...heranimals.png
43 "Other Animals" in fact! I'm hopefully going to set up a Kennels and perhaps get some more chains/restraints made. BoB do us a favour, when you take over chain wardogs at the entrance way on the statues leading to the bridge, also at various points around the map as the numbers of dogs grow. Wardogs there will prevent us being ambushed or getting Goblin Thieves inside the defenses.
Now on to the final part of Autumn's update, building plans:
Well we managed to finish the work on the following:
Eastern Expansion
Farm Plots (at least the chambers are dug, won't take a week to plant them)
New forge expansion (smelter and wood furnace are being glitchy as smurf and won't actually build until the builders have used the stone under the locations. I have already tried dumping them in a garbage zone it didn't work)
Entrance Guard Tower Ground level (winter will see at least the second level floor go in to seal the room from the elements)
Burial Chambers
Heres some screens of the new rooms and expansions:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...alchambers.png
Burial Chambers
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nexpansion.png
Eastern Expansion
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...rancetower.png
Entrance tower
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...enewfields.png
Four Fields ready to go
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...forgerooms.png
New forge chambers (possibly use one for jewellers shop if I don't use a chamber near the glassworks.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nexpansion.png
Western Expansion, this is almost complete but now our numbers and our wealth seem like they're on the verge of giving us our first ambush (in fact in the crashed version of the game which never happened I know we got an ambush right at the end of the year!)
Next up:
Winter has come
Did my guineacocks arrive? This is very important.
Yes the damn guineacocks arrived.
You love cocks don't you Paul admit it now and go out with Justy.
Well done for not only getting the joke I was making, but then attempting to borrow another one of mine made in GC a couple of days ago. Dan was wrong about you - you're improving all the time. We'll have you using punctuation correctly soon! Eee! :jess:
PS: Maybe we can go on a double date with you and Mr. Hankey.
:tumble:
Anywho, to revive this flagging thread, let's have some more discussion! https://docs.google.com/document/pub...hYmDYPhI&pli=1 Next version of DF Notes. Look at them. I am drooling. Adventure mode is going to be a monstrosity.
Also:
Attachment 34708
smurf YEAH DWARVES!
How about to revive the thread we just get Loony BoB to carry on from the first save, we will have had 4 more years by the time Steve bothers to finish his go.
lol I'm sorry just got winter to go, meant to do it sunday/last night but frankly it's been rather disturbing here these last few nights. I'll get it done tonight.
Bit of an update guys as to whats gone on.
First of all we ended up with the riots nearby etc which kinda put me out of playing DF. Just after that and working several hard crappy shifts I went to play only to find my laptop power supply unit had failed completely, thankfully it's external which means it's easily replaced. I'm hoping it'll arrive by around Weds latest. Once that gets here I can finally finish my god damn turn.
Again my apologies for taking so long.
I've gone into and woken from hibernation and the year is still not done :(Quote:
Originally Posted by DK
As soon as the damn parts for my damn laptop arrive it'll be done now chill :p
:(
This winter will be the longest.
Someone poke me on msn on sunday/monday. Sorry guys, parts arrived with me in Nottingham on a business trip. Since then my life has been chaos, for those who have me on facebook might have a little idea of what has gone on but lets say, this week has involved me lodging complaints about one housemate and having another arrested by the police.
Whilst Steve is a lazy bellend who can't be arsed to play DF, I can confirm that he has genuinely got some serious trout going on right now.
Serious trout which is no excuse lamb, get on with it.
Both my thanks and a smurf you Huxtables.
I have sent him his reminder. Everyone else should do the same, just in case. His MSN is iceglowelf@hotmail.co.uk.
Ok Ok, it'll be done by tonight :P
Evidently it won't. :colbert:
Evidently I spent most of my afternoon in discussions with my landlord about having that lying drugs using ass-shat from upstairs evicted.
WINTER HAS COME!
And it only took seventeen years of Summer.
Winter, 256 The fortress of Spoonproblems stands proud!
Of worries, plans and babies.
Winter 256, bloody hell it is cold here in Spoonproblems, it's gotten better though! The new tower encasing the entrance still needs it's second floor and roof completed but for now it's cutting most of the snow drifts off from building up at the bottom of the ramp. Our northern and Eastern expansions are now complete. Only the western expansion remains. Part of me really wants to do the tower to make it warmer here but we need space to expand more. Where else am I going to find room for the outside plantations, the animal pens and workshops, we need a butchers and a fishery and they are both best made outside with lots of open air to prevent miasma from building up. With that and the fact that I've been slightly uneasy since we saw the goblin snatcher off a few months ago. He'll be back I feel it and he won't be alone, seems the King was wrong when he sent these insane dwarves off here to the back end of nowhere to build a new fortress. It was not a land free of Goblins at all, still maybe here we can rebuild our strength, maybe here dwarf kind can be proud and free. I've ordered all work on reinforced walls and the tower to cease, instead my sole focus this winter is that western expansions walls it must be made complete! I also ordered the animals brought in from the autumn pasture, the small pastures provided by Psychotic initially will never do now, I've ordered their removal completely and instead given all of the northern expansion at present over to the animals. It won't do for a permanent solution but for now it'll be ok, maybe someone will make an independent expansion linked by tunnel to the fortress and protected by walls where we can go for animals and farming.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...dethewalls.jpg
Whilst we were busily stockpiling wood and building walls or moving animals in to the fortress a suspiciously bulging Rye organised a party. Soon after enjoying Rye's hospitality, our friends from the homeland departed. I wasn't about to let Psychotic order more guineacocks for us so instead I took control of that discussion directly. Whilst I did order some new animals to help with the species we have had little to no luck with over the past two years. I mostly ordered us some metal bars, strong steel being our priority. After wishing our southern brothers a farewell as they returned to warmer climates I was left with a fortress full of dwarves who were relying on me to see them all alive through the winter.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...sheadsouth.png
23rd Moonstone, BLAST! Just what we need, as if Will being all melancholic and refusing food and drink isn't enough Rubah goes and gets herself taken by a Fey Mood, her ramblings mean nothing and her actions are few. I don't need a third death on my hands here, Will won't last long and Rubah is going to go the same way it seems.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...byafeymood.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ookatrubah.png
9th Opal, Will finally died pretty much in the same location Melissaur died in before. I'm thinking of calling it "dead person corner" we laid him to rest in a tomb next to Melissaur, hopefully he can find peace in the next life.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...56Willdies.png
25th Opal, GREAT NEWS! Rye seems my suspicions about Rye were right, she's just given birth to a healthy baby boy! Yeargdribble is constantly going on about his wife now, I'm starting to eye up Lonny BoB's pick with a malicious thought already. JerganRX is born and welcomed to the community.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...htoJeganRX.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...256JeganRX.png
26th Opal this one was a surprise, Psychotic was sure Laddy was seen eyeing up DK doing his squats but no it's true Zeldy has given birth to a baby girl! Only a day after Rye gave birth the fortress is starting to feel like a real community, I will have to get a teacher soon at this rate. She's called her daughter Citizen Bleys, and I hope Citizen Bleys grows up to be a very productive and happy person.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...rthtobleys.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...tizenbleys.png
27th Opal, no sooner had it been built Rubah commandeered the new Jewelers workshop opposite the glass works. I've seen this before with Will but I have some hope that she will survive this!
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...welersshop.png
3rd of Obsidian, Ok so seems that was quick, Rubah managed to find everything she needed right away and so we now have our first survivor of a mood! Awesome :D This bears partying about. Rubah made a perfect gem and thus became a gem setter too so she's now officially made it on the Spoonproblems list of useful dwarves.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ahmadethis.png
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ameawesome.png
13th Obsidian, Devilman has finally grown up enough that he can start doing some work, I am considering where he will be suited best I am thinking he might become a wood burner to feed our kilns and forges.
And so we come towards the end of my year in control, here's some improvements I made aside from the cistern (complete with water management and a well), the expansions to the territories, the forges and production chambers, the tower over the entrance and all the other things:
First up I expanded on agriculture, the reason was simple we need more food for more dwarves and the farms weren't keeping up (not to mention our brewers were brewing way too much I've temporarily suspended the stills production, don't forget to keep an eye on the drinks available via the status screen and re-enable the stills after it drops below 300)
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ussomeeggs.png
Now what I'd suggest here for the next person in charge is build some Nest Boxes and place them along that top wall and also in the pastures, that way our huge supply of birds can provide us with eggs giving us another food supply.
Second up, with our massive expansion to agriculture we needed better facilities to deal with the food production, hence I moved the two stills (actually they're still there but set for removal) and built 2 kitchens and 2 farmers workshops, the butchers shop and the fisheries ideally need to be outside to prevent miasma.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...2workshops.jpg
As you can also see in there I've added some new food stockpiles, these are segregated by type, I think they may be big enough (except there might be drinks overflow) for now, obviously we need more but for now, this should help Psychotic manage our inventory perfectly.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...stockpiles.jpg
Thirdly, as mentioned earlier, I built a couple more workshops over by the glass works, these are a jewelers and also the initial layout for a loom but it's not finished at this time.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...orjewelers.jpg
This should hopefully help see the new leader through for a while.
AMBUSH!
Ok so guess my turn wasn't quite over, we got an Ambush, 6 Goblins total, 5 archers and a lasher. Thankfully my earlier paranoia meant that most of the fortress was secure and most of the dwarves too. In fact the only dwarf outside was....
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...nyeargyrun.png
Yeargdribble!
Will anyone save JerganRX's Dad? I ordered DK to the main gate, hopefully if Yeargy ran fast enough he'd make it but he's a portly dwarf and well....maybe telling the goblins about his wife wasn't such a good thing, they kinda shot him full of arrows and then stood around teabagging the corpse. It wasn't as amusing as it sounds, one of those goblins had no pants on and her leathery beef curtains was touching him. I for one am not burying that body. Thankfully someone yanked the lever in the hall and the drawbridge sealed shut.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...lemurdered.png
So we're sealed in with 6 goblins running around outside, I just hope Lonny BoB isn't stupid enough to open the damn gates, our military might is currently very understrength and not even fully armoured (we need to work on this, production is there just needs orders) Yeargdribble is dead and everyone else is safe. Apart from Rye who for some reason has a smashed open and broken first finger on her right hand. I spoke to Dr Quin and I have been informed that the diagnosis was too much masturbation but then Dr Quin is a medicine idiot.
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...rightthere.png
And so without further ado:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ingarrives.png
Fortress update:
http://i224.photobucket.com/albums/d...ressreport.png
I think that was probably a more productive outcome for our second season. I'm glad I'm creating so many wonderful masterpieces!
Ah, bollocks. The middle of a warzone. Just what I needed! =|
I have no idea how I'm going to sort this one out, but I'm sure I'll come up with something. Probably involving waiting for a caravan to arrive, watching the caravan's warriors beat up goblins and potentially getting beaten up by goblins.
PS. If you listened to me about cage traps, this wouldn't be nearly as problematic...
EDIT: I plan on doing my turn this weekend.
The fortress can definitely survive this ambush by waiting it out, I made sure of that, you've plenty of food growing sources and preparation areas. The military isn't tough enough at the moment, it's the one thing I didn't get a chance to do properly.
Traps are a development the fortress needs, just don't bother building cages, from the animals we brought we have tons.
Lonny Bob has evolved into Loony BoB!
This is almost exactly how my train of thought went when opening up the game. I have yet to actively play more than a second because the planning of the fort seems rather... unplanned.So apparently I'm the new director in this movie. smurf me, why? This is stupid. Fine. Whatever. I'll do it. Why? Because the people who have done it before me were bleeding useless. So... okay. Right. Where am I again? God dammit. Where is everything? Why are all these rocks on the ground? Okay, okay. That's probably my doing. But why has nobody moved them? I need to find out how many people are idle. Who's the boss? He'll know. Oh, wait.
Okay, I know where I am. I'm in the 0 star hotel that Psy built. This places is so bloody rubbish. Mental note: Improve bedrooms. "But there will be lots of dwarves, we'll need lots of rooms, we can't spend all our time mining them out and setting them up!" cries some bastard with a massive awesome room. Okay. Maybe there will be a lot of dwarves. Maybe they will come. Or maybe they'll hear about the 0 star hotel you have and how tiny the rooms are and maybe they'd rather DIE. :(
Let's see. The hotel floor connects to a hallway that leads to the dining room. Okay. And that must be the barracks to the East, along with the bastard's bedroom. South towards the smelters and metalsmith forge. Okay. North towards stairs. That lead to a rubbish cemetary. What else... dining room has levers. South of Dining Room leads to some bedrooms which are superior in every way to the hotel but seem to be set up for a hospital. Oh, it's a hospital. Right. North of the dining room is a grave for the bastard.
Who the hell designed this place? Don't answer that. We all know.
Going all the way back towards the cemetary, it seems above that is a storage room and some workshops for clothing, glass and bling. Right. Above the hospital is the food storage and the chief medical officer's office/dining room. Okay. Two stills in the food storage area. Both slated for removal. Why? I'm not sure. Ohhhh, that's why. Someone's set up an improved kitchen/farmershop/still area to the right. Nice.
Next level up, farms. And a kiln and an almost-kiln. Next level up, cistern to the east. Next level up, sunlight. Pasture. Carpenter's workshops!? In the rain!? Oh man. Mason's workshops, too. And goblins. Let's forget about them for a moment. Or not. What's our military like? Six guys, not including the best swordsman we have in our group, Bolivar. He's too busy "making clothes" (ie, being assigned to make clothes but not really making clothes).
Here's what I'm going to try to do.
Operation: PANIC ROOM
Set up a room where all civilians will run to when an enemy is sighted. Actually, I've already set up this room, and it's the dining room. Eventually I'll look into a more effective room that is a bit more 'purpose built'.
Operation: Dwarves Hate Working In the Sun And/Or Rain
Move the workshops and storage underground to avoid sun, rain and enemies.
Operatoin: Dwarves Should Learn to Like the Sun Anyway
As much as I hate the sun, I can understand that regular access to it can help, so the target is to set up a statue garden which is COMPLETELY walled off, no doors, nothing. Just a stairway to sweet, sweet underground. That way we hopefully won't have problems with dwarves getting molesight.
Operation: I Hate Goblins, But I Hate Death Even More
Capture or kill all goblins without suffering any damage.
Operation: Cage Traps, Cage Traps, Cage Traps and also Cage Traps
Set up improved defence systems.
Operation: The Great Indoors
Find a cavern. Cut off all access to cavern completely. Watch trees grow underground so we don't have to go above ground to cut down trees anymore, either.
Operation: Operation
Tables directly next to the beds in the hospital.
Operation: Catsplosion
We need to explode cats. I can only assume that this is what Catsplosion means. Catsplosion will lead to an excellent way to eventually explore a cavern without the loss of life... dwarf life, anyway.
Operation: Stones are Only Useful In Certain Places
Time to move the stone to certain places where it will be useful. I just checked: 16 idlers at present. That is more than enough.
Operation: Soldier On
Analyse the military schedules, equipment, training etc. and react accordingly.
Operation: Make Use
Look into a more effective job setup. Key point: More miners needed for all this work. There are only two at present.
There are also considerations for a complete overhaul of the layout in some areas so that dwarves don't have to spent their time walking around so much. But that would take some time and I'm not sure I could manage it in just one year.
EDIT: By the way, our soldiers have never trained. The schedule for our only squad is set so that they wait for 10 soldiers to be present in the barracks before they begin training. We have six soldiers...
I decided my first priority was the goblins. But that would require a few things to be sorted out. So I decided my first priority was the military. And the panic room. I ordered a team meeting and explained that from now on, the dining room would be the room where you go when there are 'problems'. At which point it would become the panic room. Everyone seemed to get the idea, which was good. I then notified the military that they should probably train, and they advised me they didn't have ten members yet. Under the advice of DK, I enlisted the only remaining expendable people who had any kind of military training whatsoever. Azar, who was good with an axe, was first in. After that, Devore and Miss_Lulu were all we could think of. I'd already enlisted Bolivar, he was pretty damned good with a sword. So that made ten. I told them to train with a minimum of six people. They'd have to sleep in their own rooms for now, but eventually the barracks would contain beds. I made a quick note to knock a bloody big hole into the wall of the barracks to ensure this went ahead.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/1.jpg
Those goblins were still hanging around, so I devised a plan. Our military simply were underequipped and would not handle a direct assault against the goblin's bowmen without taking casualties, so we decided to outwit the enemy instead. We dug a tunnel to just outside the wall, and filled it with cage traps - six deep, considering there were six goblins. Two wide, just in case... as my Dad always told me when I was a kid, where there are goblins, there are probably more goblins. I stationed DK and his crew immediately outside, and the trap was set. Now all we needed was someone to dig up to the ground, showing the goblins a nice convenient way into our fort... naturally, nobody volunteered. I'd have to do this one myself. I carefully chipped away until I saw the hiddeous light. As soon as that happened, I blasted my pickaxe through the ground and ran for my smurfing life. I knew they wouldn't be far behind. They weren't.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/2.jpg
I had barely run past DK when the goblins thrust through the underground doors and then the sweet sound of success hit my ears. The sound of a cage trap. And another, and another, and three more.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/4.jpg
Flawless victory.
We've left them in their cages for now until we someday get some kind of arena set up for them to fight bears or something. I dunno. Chuffed with my first plan working exactly as intended, I headed back to the dining room and told everyone it was safe, and that they could carry on as they did before. Devil Man looked at me oddly, quickly pulled the lever and then took off past me like lightning had struck him. He's in a strange mood, I thought to myself. ...Oh, no...
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/5.jpg
Maybe he'll be okay. He ran off and got this and that and...
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/6.jpg
Yeah, good luck with that one, buddy. Better hope the next caravan has something like that, because our stocks sure as hell don't. I'm really hoping we have a nice, safe cavern eventually because otherwise any further silk demands will be met purely by trade, and I do hate relying on others... especially with that weird Psychotic in charge of goods.
"Hello?" I turned around. "Are you... Lonny Bob?" Some weird guy and 19 of his friends were looking at me as if I was their long lost grandaddy or something.
"It's Loony BoB. Who the hell are you?"
"Well, you see, I'm the leader of this here bunch - my name is Unbreakable Will."
"No, I'm pretty sure Unbreakable Will is dead. He got into this weird mood and..."
"-- No, I really am Unbreakable Will. You're referring to Breakable Will, my brother, who often calls himself Unbreakable Will because he wishes he had an unbreakable will. Wait, he's dead? Ah, bugger, the guy owed me an artifact."
"Huh. He died after his will broke because he was trying to make one. Go figure."
"Yes, uh, anyway. Any chance of us moving in? Thanks!"
With that, Unbreakable Will headed past and I was left with 19 doe-eyed dwarfs one by one introducing themselves.
My lengthy way of explaining the roles of our newest dwarvesIt turns out Unbreakable Will is a bit of a novice leader - and sadly, that's about all he is. Really, he's not even skilled in mining. And everyone can mine, right!? Wrong. No miners. I hate this place sometimes. Well, if I can't get a miner given to me, I'll make one. Shiny's my new recruit. She usually deals with gemsetting but sod that, she's a miner now. We still needed another brewer to work the stills recently, too, so when I spoke to a guy standing still at the back named kelseystill I found out that he works a still. I told him to go to a still, but he's still there. But still, at least that's another still worker. A guy instroduced himself as TrollHunter but he's not a Hunter, so I just enlisted him into the army instead. He can hunt goblins. TrollHunter will use an axe, while Del Murder will use a war hammer. That means Lulu and Devore don't need to worry anymore about their lack of skills with a weapon. Excellent.
Next up was Unne, who it turns out is a high master diagnostician. We have a competent diagnostician in Quin, but he's an idiot, so Dr Unne is now chief medical officer, allowing Quin to do focus more on developing his surgery, setting and suturing - three things Unne isn't so hot at. The guy dresses wounds like a pro, though. Kentarou is his protege, but only in the diagnostics area. Our hospital now has two full time staff and Kentarou says he likes to do something called 'pressing' in his spare time. Pressing? Pressing what? We don't even have buttons.
The guy who followed the medicine fellas was called Peegee. He liked to do things with bees, and I didn't want to know any more. I put him on engraving duty. The guy weirds me out. His friend, Baloki, also liked creatures - he insisted he train our animals. I thought we could do with an animal trainer that wasn't hero, who had his hands full with other things. Baloki had this massive gleam in his eye when I said he can work with the cats and dogs. It creeped me out to no end. I'm not sure I made the right decision. NeoCracker agreed, he said he'd have been better, but when I put a dog in front of him he insisted that he could only work with cats so I told him he can have odd jobs in the kitchen, gemsetting shop and the soapmaking workshop which doesn't exist.
The next chap, Rocket Edge, was a sure winner. The guy is a stonecrafter and a furnace operater, two things we can always do with. He was followed by Yeargdribble II, who reminded me of someone I once knew. I seemed to remember some guy staggering around outside, so naturally I sent Yeargdribble II out to gather plants. He said he thinks he saw the guy who I was referring to, and I tell ya, ever since he seems to gather those plants like he'll be dead tomorrow. Odd fella, but I'm not complaining about his efficiency.
Who else was there? Samuraid, a mechanic who could craft rocks. JKTrix, who liked to report the news of his masonry work by doing a spot of engraving in his spare time. o_O, who carried a sack of seeds and went straight to the farms. A spinning girl named Christmas, a guy named Rostum who did nothing important (he's a miner now!), and a brilliant chap named BG-57, who had some proper good skill with stonecrafting, is now easily our most skilled weaponsmith and isn't bad in a kitchen, either. Not as good as Miriel, though, who adores her food. And Melissaur II, who gets a freaky thrill out of setting fire to things, so off to the wood furnace with her.
With all that out of the way, it's been, what, a day or two? Bloody hell. I'm in for a tricky job, I reckon.
Remember Devil Man?
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/7.jpg
He's basically already dead.
Oh, bollocks.
Okay, goblins. Again. Seriously, it's not even a new freakin' season yet. :( This is not good, they've been spotted on our doorstep. I scream an order downstairs and look horrified as Laddy runs straight across the bridge - as it drops. He falls. It's quite the fall. But he's alive! I rush down and smash through the lower wall, grab him, rush back in and order a wall built to fill in the gap. I leave Laddy to the docs, run upstairs to see what the goblins are doing. They're...
Oh, bollocks.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/8.jpg
That X? That's theundeadhero. Perhaps not undead for very long. I order the lever pulled again, the military are up now. I quickly dismiss TrollHunter and Del Murder as they don't have enough equipment to handle a battle just yet (not sure if the others really do either, but we have to try!).
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/9.jpg
By the time the drawbridge is down, he's already dead. I hate goblin crossbowmen. The lever is pulled again. We'll have to do the same thing as last time. =| Mental note: Put traps outside until we have full iron armor and weaponary on every soldier. And a set of marksdwarves.
So, how do we -
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/10.jpg - and he's inside the fortress walls.
Oh, come on. Really? REALLY!?
The bastard is seen by the military. Four of our soldiers for some reason are unable to follow the order to kill the Goblin Thief. DK, ShlupQuack and AngelWings8 rampage him, but he's slick. Is this world on hard mode? Seriously, in my previous fortress, I remember goblin thieves being a piece of cake for a single novice wrestler. DK has motor nerve damage and has lost his ability to grasp a little. Shlup? She can no longer stand. smurf this fortress, man. Did we build right next to the goblin city without knowing it? The sooner we no longer need the surface, the better. And yes, it really has only been a month or so. =|
So, those crossbow gob--
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/10.jpg (yes, I used the same image twice, that is not a mistake)
...
Jesus Christ that was extensive. After a quick skim read I've ascertained that we're probably smurfed. I'll do a reread now.
Hurrah! Spoonproblems is back!
Boo! Spoonproblems is smurfed!
...or maybe that's a hurrah too.
Also, I think the bedrooms look stylish. :colbert: But yeah hospital patients and soldiers and awesome people like me get better bedrooms. It's only fair! :doublecolbert:
Jesus christ, even in the land of Dwarves we can't escape the hideous clutches of Arsene Wenger. Protect the children indeed.
We're not smurfed. Yet. Yet.
The sad thing about this game is that I don't know if I will actually get a chance to make bedrooms for people. xD With so many goblins, well, it's pretty endless really.
Mining 101: When the going gets tough, you dig deep.
The next goblin thief was not as tough. It didn't need to be, at least, not for a while. Because it ran. And boy, could this little sod run.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/11.jpg
Eventually, they caught up with him.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/12.jpg
He still got away - and ran downstairs. Eventually, this thief would die somewhere around our dining room or something. We'll inevitably get miasma problems but perhaps our cleaners will be good, who knows. Either way, it was time to just leave the goblins outside alone for a bit while I assessed the damage. Oh, wait.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/13.jpg
Phew. Can you imagine if he went berserk? This place would be proper smurfed then. Also...
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/14.jpg
About smurfin' time. I decided to check on where the goblins were to ensure we weren't in any immediate trouble, since they can probably fire through the entrance using their crossbows.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/15.jpg
Luckily, they were North of us, between the lakes. As I checked to see if any of our soldiers were still above ground, I noticed this. It wasn't intentional - they were on automation, still, for some reason. It genuinely summed up the atmosphere of the fortress, though.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/16.jpg
With that done, I headed down to the hospital. Four were in beds.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/17.jpg
At the top was Genius Lynx, who had no health problems in his status screen. Thank God.
Bottom left was ShlupQuack, who had lost her ability to stand.
The middle of the bottom three is DK, who had suffered motor nerve damage and, I'm told by Unne, may never grasp an axe quite the same way again. But he'll still be capable. They left it up to me as to whether he remains in the military. I'll reassess things later. We're safe... for now. And then, finally, there was Laddy. The outlook was not good. He was suffering from heavy bleeding. And... he couldn't breathe. I'm not sure how he is still alive. :( He has lost the ability to stand and grasp. This is not cool. I don't know if I saved him fast enough. Only time will tell. Hopefully Unne, Quin and Kentarou can work some kind of miracle.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/18.jpg
ShlupQuack has her wounds dressed, grabs a crutch and heads off to eat. She declares herself a wrestler even now. She's a fighter, that's for sure.
I went back upstairs and looked at Marshall Banana as she hammered away. Five workshops were all in use. In the open. It was time for change. I ripped them all down and built a new set of workshops around the furnaces. And as for the woodcutters, the plant gatherers...
I dug. Pike dug. Ashley dug. Rostum dug. Shiny dug. We dug until we found it.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/19.jpg
A cavern! I immediately closed off access to the cavern, flooring over the old stairway. The magical nature of the deeps had done it's work already. Moss appeared upstairs by the farms, in the hospital (mental note: Put down flooring on that level). I picked out a spot for a large open space and knew that once we dug out that zone, we would have a private underground garden with trees and plants in safe location. One project that will pay off untold amounts. Perfect.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/20.jpg
As if to celebrate, AngelWings8 popped out a baby! And then...!
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/21.jpg
Hooray! They're coming in from the North!
...wait.
SMURF.
If there are any survivors from the migrants I would like to be dwarfed if possible.
These clinic beds sure are something, let me tell you.
There are seven of them. Our warriors number roughly the same amount - those who are equipped for battle and off their hospital bed, anyway, and that includes Shlup who is on a crutch. So six, really. The enemies, weilding crossbows, also number six. I... don't think this wave of seven migrants is going to come to a happy ending. I think they're basically guaranteed death unless I get really lucky and find a way to draw the enemy away, or perhaps if they scatter, some might make it in somehow. But I'll have to lower the drawbridge if that happens and that would mean my six warriors and the rest of our group being endangered. I really need to sort out cage traps and do it effing fast after this lot are done. A very significant number of them, too.Quote:
Originally Posted by qwertysaur
War Dogs, why don't you have war dogs on the military squad dude!
I literally haven't had the chance since I got the game. xD I've barely got into summer and I've already gone through three episodes. Hopefully the next two thirds of my year will be a bit more easy-going. Hopefully!
________________________________
Goblins, aka Immigration Control
I had to do something. Dropping the drawbridge would do no good - easy access to every one of our civilians was stupid. The only other way in was through the cage trap tunnel - there were still a few cage traps there and the military could handle the rest. But it was too late for hoping the goblins would charge in - they had a number of dwarves that had to go past them to get inside the fort. Still, if they scattered, or were fast and good at dodging (as many of the incoming dwarves seemed to be, luckily), some could survive. The goblins would follow them and at least half would end up in a cage, while the others would face up against the remnants of our military force. We could only try.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/22.jpg
As you can see, it was quite likely we'd get most of the goblins captured while the civilians hid in the dining room.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/23.jpg
The first of the dwarves - pamelasandon - appears. Upon seeing the goblins (below left), she screams at the top of her lungs. "Fungal disease that blankets leaves!" Yeah, the goblins heard her scream and made a beeline for her immediately.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/24.jpg
Meanwhile, Del Murder started deconstructing the walled off cage trap tunnel.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/25.jpg
At that same time, crossbow bolts whizzed towards pamelasandon, and she was wounded and killed almost immediately.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/26.jpg
She survived just long enough for the next dwarf to arrive - davidhass3lh0ff.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/27.jpg
The military were stationed and ready for the incoming attack, including both DK and ShlupQuack. The wall downed, I made one final check to ensure all civilians returned to the dining room. They had (migrants excepted). Good. Just the military and the six remaining migrants, then.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/28.jpg
davidhass3lh0ff ran to the right despite having a crossbow sticking out of his leg, and managed to survive a lot longer than pamelasandon. This gave time for qwertysaur and crono_logical to also run in, as seen to the right. Meanwhile, zohaib hussein ran in to the left, which was completely unexpected. He dragged a couple of crossbowmen with him, which certainly made matters a little more interesting...
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/29.jpg
davidhass3lh0ff died almost immediately afterwards, as seen above. However, looking near the bottom of the page you'll see clout and qwerty with a good distance covered and heading home. To the far right, by the river, you see Shattered Dreamer and Big D.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/30.jpg
Here we see qwerty and clout running into the sweet safety of the fortress, the last of the elven merchants leaving, and... Wait, why are the military heading outdoors?
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/31.jpg
zohaib somehow is still alive. Seriously, this guy has been running circles around two enemy crossbowmen for some time now.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/32.jpg
To the bottom left, we see goblins running towards the cage trap tunnel and the military who, Azar leading the way, have gone to pick up items despite the fact I've stationed them within the tunnel. Only some of them, mind you. Must be better armour around or something. Panic stations. Oh, to the top right, you see Big D. To the bottom right corner, you would see Shattered Dreamer if he wasn't on a different level to everyone else. He's by the lake on the level above.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/33.jpg
Azar heads on a suicide mission towards the goblins. By this point I have decided all military will charge these two goblins. The other has headed off after Big D. The numbers are suddenly stacked firmly in our favour for this skirmish.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/34.jpg
Although difficult to see (I forgot to zoom back in after earlier pictures), to the left you see the remnants of a goblin Azar freaking obliterated the moment he collided with the enemy. Seriously, epic first kill. The goblin lasted less than a second. The other guy took a bit more work, but DK, GeniusLynx and his wife AngelWings8 - carrying her baby - despatch the second foe. At some point around here, zohaib died. I have no idea how, as his body is no longer in the game. I tried to zoom to his location using his status screen, but it wouldn't. Weird. I guess he'll be ghosting us at some point! DK charged towards the lasher and crossbow weidling goblins chasing Big D and Shattered Dreamer, seen to the right.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/35.jpg
Here we see DK smashing up a lasher with AngelWings8 while everyone else gangs up on the Big D-chasing crossbowman, who died quickly. The lasher managed to survive a bit longer. But... Wait. This was all too easy. I count off the kills.
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/36.jpg
Oh. Ha. I organise for a doconstruction of a wall so our guys can take out the last of them, and...
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/37.jpg
...well, we lost another. We always knew Shlup was close to Devil Man, so I hope...
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/38.jpg
...ah, bugger. She throws a rock against a wall in the fort and gets over it, though. Atta girl.
A better engineer than me would organize a method of flooding and draining that ditch. Drowning goblins sounds much more fun than punching them to death (despite what ShlupQuack says).
Stay alive, Loony BoB, keep us alive, and make Spoonproblems proud.
Life, Death, Afterlife and more Life.
Okay, while we fought all those goblins, I forgot to update you about a couple of babies. But it's cool, because Shlup & Raist had set a reminder for me to update you about them. That reminder came in the form of another baby.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/39.jpg
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/40.jpg
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/41.jpg
Somehow, baby Cuchulainn is already the most foul-mouthed dwarf in Spoonproblems. I was teaching him a new word or two of my own when an all too familiar call came from the fortress entrance. "Get the smurf off me, you smurfing ugly green bastards!"
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/43.jpg
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/42.jpg
It was foa. :( She had spotted not just an ambush, but two goblin thieves. Right at the fortress entrance. Laddy didn't make it after his drop, but I knew what I had to do. I ordered the lever pulled, and hoped she'd make it inside somehow. I was not optimistic.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/44.jpg
Immediately after this, another goblin squad appeared on the map. They had Shorty completely surrounded.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/45.jpg
This is about one or two seconds later.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/46.jpg
It was then that I was informed of the third squad. They were spotted by an incoming caravan of human merchants. By my count, that's two human soldiers, two human merchants and at least four goblin warriors. I left the human soldiers to it.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/47.jpg
RIP, Shorty & foa. You were two dwarves that dramatically improved our fortress and without you it will not be the same.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/48.jpg
The merchants travelled past the (now much better prepared) cage trap tunnel. Our soldiers stand ready to embark on their hunt, although at this point with no dwarves outside, a rather wise DK advises them to wait for the goblins to walk into the traps. At the moment, the odds are not in our favour. The few goblins that survived the human soldiers are quickly secured, and our newest goblin problem is over. Phew. Oh, and the goblin snatchers were ripped up by our military within the fortress walls.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/49.jpg
Dear Autumn, please do not send any more goblins our way, kind regards, Loony BoB.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/50.jpg
I wonder what Xalibar is up to?
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/51.jpg
Xalibar is up to being smurfing awesome, that's what. Take notes, everyone. This is EXACTLY what everyone should do with their enemies. Turn their bones into weapons. Hell yes. I can only hope someday this is added to a weapon trap so that it stabbity-stabs other goblins.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/52.jpg
Called it.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/53.jpg
Whee. Today's migrants arrive without issue for a change, and casually walk in to the mines. I quickly recruit edczxcvbnm into our second military squad. Why? Because he's bloody good with a crossbow, and that's a first for us. Well, there's BG-57 who is a novice with one, but he's our only talented weaponsmith. Anyway, edc won't be training or anything just yet as he's just one marksdwarf and there isn't an archery target built. I have, however, established two new barracks areas which will eventually be set up for the Fortress Guard (led by another newcomer, KaiserDragon, who possibly will use the goblin bone spear) and the marksdwarfs respectively. Someone else will have to carry out the final touches in there, but probably only when there are enough people to make the squads useful.
Anyway. We also got Shaibana [Carpenter/Woodcrafter], some guy who insisted he didn't need a name (He's nicknamed by his mates as 'Idnan', so we'll go with that) [Mason/Glazer/Makeshift Wood Burner], McLovin' [Glassmarker/Makeshift Miner], DocFrance [High Master Bone Doctor/High Master Wound Dresser], Jentleness [Bone Setter/Presser/Animal Dissector], Tavrobel [Engraver] and Dr Eddz [Accomplished Suturer/Accomplished Wound Dresser]. At least our medics are populous.
It's probably time I updated you guys on the projects I've set up, now that things are running slightly more smoothly.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/54.jpg
Here we see the entrance to the fortress. This forces enemies into running through set cage traps should they try to sneak up on dwarfs in positions such as that which foa was in. Sadly, she was in this position while making these walls. :( Catch 22. Hopefully it will save many a life in the future.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/55.jpg
I have decided to leave the cage tunnel permanently open for now. If fully prepared, it will stop a minimum of 19 goblins and a maximum of 42 goblins. Maybe 45, I'm sure I put a few cage traps by the stairs, too... But yeah. Obviously it's unlikely we'll get to that, but please, keep building cages. There are only four things wood should be used for in this game, all are important. But, in order of importance, I would say that it goes like this: Cages, Charcoal, Beds, Bins. But obviously - make them all. Don't settle for just one or two. Hopefully woodcutting will eventually not be highly required, though. I strongly suggest my future replacement arrange for a lot of wood to be imported and to trade it in whenever possible. We'll always have easy access to stone. Wood is a different story. Hopefully the underground garden will pay off and we'll have trees that are safe to get to, but they will never grow fast enough to satisfy the potential huge population of dwarfs we may have.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/56.jpg
Some people collect stamps. Some people collect figurines. I collect goblins.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/57.jpg
Here is the beginnings of our underground garden. Feel free to expand it as much as you like, so long as you don't dig beneath a lake or something stupid like that. :p It should stop you from doing such a thing, but yeah, don't do it.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/58.jpg
Our dwarves have been unhappy lately, so I've decided to smooth all the stone in the dining room so they feel a little better about where they eat. I have also built floors into the hospital and cemetery. The construction of a wall in the cemetery is pretty much done, and it should hopefully be engraved by someone eventually.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/59.jpg
The barracks expansion, stage one. The two other barracks rooms have since been mined out below this one. It allows for ten soldiers to sleep, and spar a little easier. I've also mined out an area to the right of the barracks. This would be a useful spot to put down a weapon/armor stockpile (I never got around to it). It's even seperated a little so the ammunition can go into the bottom room, which would be ideal for the marksdwarves who will likely use the bottom barracks for training.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/60.jpg
The workshop area. There are no longer any workshops above ground. This means more time hauling items, but it also means happier dwarves and it most certainly means safer dwarves. The stairs going up in the middle of the workshop walls lead to a stone and wood stockpile. The little hall heading to the left has since been expanded to lead to a massive room, which would be ideal for finished goods.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/61.jpg
I got curious since zobain stalked haunting us and did eventually find his corpse. In the deeps of the river. If someone can think of a way to get him out, go for it!
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/62.jpg
...oh, for the love of... (in case anyone is wondering, a cyclops is a building destroyer and can smash through walls or anything).
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/63.jpg
Nice timing, Manus. The guy must think we have a distinguished guest or something.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/64.jpg
Oh, maybe we do. :) He avoided smashing walls and went through the main entrance and got caught by cage trap #1.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/65.jpg
Our new youngest dwarf! Man, they're popping out like crazy lately.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/66.jpg
Another!
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/67.jpg
Spring: Goblins. Summer: More goblins. Autumn: Oger. Winter: ???
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/68.jpg
Please live, please live, please live... Oh, he's going to the jeweler's shop. Easy!
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/69.jpg
Bling bling.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/70.jpg
EVERYONE HAS NICKNAMES. But apparently not Pete for President's parents. I have no idea who these people are and I don't know how to find out without wasting time. So I don't waste time. But whoever you are: Congratulations!
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/71.jpg
Upon looking at the nobles screen, I saw that we now had a bunch of requirements I'd not had time to look into earlier. So welcome to the noble rooms. To the upper left, you have the mayor's bedroom. Below it is the mayor's study/office. Below that is the mayor's dining room. Feel free to make them really fancy. Every square on this floor should realistically be smoothed down at the very least, and perhaps engraved. But for now, just smoothed. Anyway. The nine small rooms above and below the stairwell room are for the other nobles. The rooms on the right are to be kept free until we someday (I'm optimistic here) have a baron sent our way. For now, Psychotic is our mayor, manager, broker and record keeper. In the long run, mayors will be elected so it's anyone's guess. Unless we get a better record keeper than Psy, he should keep that job. Unless we get a better organizer than Psy, he should keep that job, too. And unless somehow we get a bloody awesome appraiser, I think he's gonna keep that job for life, because he's pretty damned good at it. The only other noble we have that requires a room is the captain of the guard, KaiserDragon. So he gets the three rooms just to the right of Psy's bedroom.
(SPOILER)http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/72.jpg
Winter was clearly our best season ever. Anyway, with Bolivar's creepy attachment to his iron short sword, well, I'm done. This game was just non-stop. I have never had so much to do! I hope the next person who follows up my turn will have a great year.
Things that I did not get done that I wanted to get done:
1. Put tables directly next to every bed in the hospital. I forgot one of them. :p
2. Set up stockpiles for finished goods, armor, weapons, leather, cloth, etc.
3. Smooth stone. Everywhere!
4. Set up better barracks. Continue to expand the military.
5. Engrave the hell out of the cemetery. RIP.
6. Build floors on the walkways of the dirt levels. The secure underground garden is great, but we really, really don't want trees growing in front of entrances to workshops and whatnot. This will take a lot of time, but in the long run will be worth it.
7. Continue to build bedrooms. The floor below the noble rooms is a good place to continue expanding.
8. Keep going down from the bedrooms and eventually - eventually - you'll find that I've mined a pathway to below the cavern. Keep digging around this floor and the ones below - carefully walling off any cavern access you might accidentally create - and look for a flux stone: Calcite, Chalk, Dolomite, Limestone or Marble. If we can find some of this, we can start making our own steel. Yay!
IMPORTANT: You know how Psy told you to pull the lever? Well, if the cage traps are ready (ie, they have a cage in them, and the cage is not full of some monster) then leave it down if there are people still outside. Pull the lever when civilians are INSIDE. If they are not, rely on the cage traps. HOWEVER. What you really, really need to do is USE THE PANIC (DINING) ROOM! Press 'm' for military, 'a' for alerts, go right twice so you highlight 'Dining Room' and press ENTER to order every civilian to run to the dining room and stay there. Your military will remain active. So: m, a, right, right, enter. Do the same thing again to take away the alert and allow your civilians to go back to work/idling/whatever.
ALSO IMPORTANT: To get your military to kill something, press 's' for squads, 'a' for "The Copper Words" (DK's squad), then follow the instructions carefully (eg. m for move, k for kill). Perhaps more importantly, when the military are no longer needed to be moving or killing, press 's' 'a' 'o' to cancel their order. Otherwise they will spend all eternity trying to kill something they have already killed, or trying to stand in the spot they were told to stand in. They will only return for food/drink. So cancel their order when done so they can return to their training etc.
EDIT: One last thing to my far, far too long post: I just noticed after playing a bit longer on my own time that BG-57 is dead because he violated a mandate of Psychotic's. I don't know if this is just in my playthrough or if this happened before I saved the game or the next person's turn. So now we have no real decent weaponsmith. It may be worth setting up a prison or something. DK & Shlup have also been punished, but obviously they live on.
GOBPROBZ!
Can we get a screenshot of Eggut Omrist? Also what an awful use for a legendary spear, man. Give it to some high up military type.
Also, Cyclops in a cage, eh? I call dibs!There is no smugface big enough for this.Quote:
For now, Psychotic is our mayor, manager, broker and record keeper. In the long run, mayors will be elected so it's anyone's guess. Unless we get a better record keeper than Psy, he should keep that job. Unless we get a better organizer than Psy, he should keep that job, too. And unless somehow we get a bloody awesome appraiser, I think he's gonna keep that job for life, because he's pretty damned good at it
Actually wait, yes, yes there is.
http://i43.photobucket.com/albums/e3.../giantsmug.png
Heh.
You mean the description?Quote:
Originally Posted by Psychotic
I don't think a legendary spear will be that useful to any of our military types considering they are all useless with a spear. Kaiser is a speardwarf, so he'll probably get it, unless there is an iron spear around or something. Which there might be, actually. Either way, bone spears are pretty useless when you're in the middle of a battle, at least compared to an iron equivalent. Kaiser doesn't even use a weapon at the moment anyway, he's never on active duty because he's the only member of the guard.Quote:
Originally Posted by DF
Psychotic vs. Cyclops in the arena? ;) Even with a bone spear, I dunno...Quote:
Also, Cyclops in a cage, eh? I call dibs!
I think you'll lose the manager spot once another organiser appears. We could give it to DK, who is already a lot better than you at it (a squad leader thing, maybe?), but he's too good a warrior to be stuck behind a desk doing paperwork. Nobody else is organised yet. Hopefully someone turns up. You haven't gained any experience in organising at all, weirdly. I think when you have multiple jobs, some jobs end up taking a back seat... dunno. Shaterred Dreamer could be a worthy Record Keeper as he has 3000xp in it (Skilled), but you're on 4,998 at the moment (Talented) so it's a tough choice. Appraising? Ha! You're a Professional Appraiser (8,980xp) compared to our alternative, Rye, who is a Novice with 500xp.Quote:
For now, Psychotic is our mayor, manager, broker and record keeper. In the long run, mayors will be elected so it's anyone's guess. Unless we get a better record keeper than Psy, he should keep that job. Unless we get a better organiser than Psy, he should keep that job, too. And unless somehow we get a bloody awesome appraiser, I think he's gonna keep that job for life, because he's pretty damned good at it
My tips for your opposition to staying as (elected) mayor are Unbreakable Will, eternal essence, Zeldy and Rye. If I had to pick one, it'd be eternal essence.
Thanks, now I know to send to the caverns and pretend to be upset when they mysteriously vanish. :)
Also don't burst my bubble, man.
Also also, for those who care (I estimate precisely 0 people) I have finally updated the list of updates in the first post to include Iceglow's reign of terror and the rise of Loony BoB.
Okay, it'll be the dining room for all time, probably. It's handy that it's a "nice looking" place, so the dwarves should be happy until someday something breaks through from the depths and wipes us all out. Er... might be worth putting traps somewhere between the depths and the dining room at some point... let alone the bedrooms. Either way: Panic room set up. ✔Quote:
Originally Posted by Loony BoB
✔ - Done.Quote:
Operation: Dwarves Hate Working In the Sun And/Or Rain
Move the workshops and storage underground to avoid sun, rain and enemies.
X - Fail.Quote:
Operatoin: Dwarves Should Learn to Like the Sun Anyway
As much as I hate the sun, I can understand that regular access to it can help, so the target is to set up a statue garden which is COMPLETELY walled off, no doors, nothing. Just a stairway to sweet, sweet underground. That way we hopefully won't have problems with dwarves getting molesight.
✔ - I was referring to the initial attack on our fort that was ongoing, and this was 100% successful. Sucks about the later losses, though. :(Quote:
Operation: I Hate Goblins, But I Hate Death Even More
Capture or kill all goblins without suffering any damage.
✔ - Done. Also, I found this while at work today. It sums up my initial strategy in DF defence 100%.Quote:
Operation: Cage Traps, Cage Traps, Cage Traps and also Cage Traps
Set up improved defence systems.
✔ - Done. Well, aside from watching trees grow. It was winter! But all the same, now spring is here, hopefully it will hapen. There have been a bunch of shrubs that have already grown, though. Yay.Quote:
Operation: The Great Indoors
Find a cavern. Cut off all access to cavern completely. Watch trees grow underground so we don't have to go above ground to cut down trees anymore, either.
✔ - Done. Okay, okay, but seven out of eight isn't bad, though.Quote:
Operation: Operation
Tables directly next to the beds in the hospital.
X - 100% fail. Our female and male cat simply do not want to. We need to bring in more cats.Quote:
Operation: Catsplosion
We need to explode cats. I can only assume that this is what Catsplosion means. Catsplosion will lead to an excellent way to eventually explore a cavern without the loss of life... dwarf life, anyway.
✔ - Done. There are still a large number of rooms which need to be cleared out (d, b, d to dump large numbers of items at once, for anyone interested in playing next), but the key areas I wanted cleared were cleared.Quote:
Operation: Stones are Only Useful In Certain Places
Time to move the stone to certain places where it will be useful. I just checked: 16 idlers at present. That is more than enough.
✔ - Done. Also, they now have iron armor/weapons. All of the main squad, anyway. At least, they better have it on, because otherwise our dwarfs made all that stuff for nothing. :(Quote:
Operation: Soldier On
Analyse the military schedules, equipment, training etc. and react accordingly.
✔ - Done. But now we need a new weaponsmith. eternal essence is a makeshift one, but man, hopefully we get one soon. :(Quote:
Operation: Make Use
Look into a more effective job setup. Key point: More miners needed for all this work. There are only two at present.
So... who's up next?
http://www.aiyon.com/keke/df/Eyesonia.rar (9M)
gawd if I had any idea how to work this game, I would be all over it. It's just so hard working with ascii :(
Use a damn interface mod you filthy smurfing convict, just be sure to turn true-type fonts on as well.
Give me a step-by-step way to do this and I shall. All the explanations I found online assumed I was already a dwarf fortress pro but I am a complete and utter retard.
The best thing you can do is download the game (use the Lazy Newbie pack Psy linked to early on), open the Lazy Newbie pack, set the preferred options (I can't advise on them at the moment since I'm at work, but someone else can probably chime in to help) and mess about with a few games. Install a graphics pack and I advise using Dwarf Therapist, as it makes it a lot easier to manage your dwarfs after they get a little numerous.
As for a startup walkthrough sort of thing, well, the best you'll get is something like this...
Dwarf Fortress Wiki
Particularly the "New to Dwarf Fortress?" bit. Particularly this: DF2010:Quickstart guide - Dwarf Fortress Wiki
You'll lose a few games early on, probably, but eventually you'll get the hang of things. The more you play, the more you learn. There are still things I don't know about the game but I can have a very large almost-self-running fortress pretty quickly in this game despite that. Once you have a fair idea of how things work (ie how to change jobs of dwarfs, how to nickname them, how to obtain wood/stone, how to mine, how to increase food production, how to increase drink production, how to create things, how to build structures/place furniture, how to trade, how to run away from an enemy and how to attack an enemy) then you should be good to at least have a shot at the EoFF version. In fact, in the EoFF game, you'll barely have to touch the food/drink production for some time as we're overflowing with plant-food and alcohol.
Basically, though: Wing it! If you're not ready just yet, I'm sure someone else can have a go and then you can pick up after their year. =] But somebody carry on the line! If nobody is playing this game by tomorrow I may resort to PM'ing people bugging them into it. :p I'll at least PM DP, MB and Quin since they established an interest in running the game some time ago.
I will get on this later tonight hopefully, I have the download file, however, if someone else beats me to it, that too is fine.
Do it, do it nao!
So first off, you people have designed an absolutely amazingly terrible fortress. I also hate these bedroom designs and will be constructing a new and more beautiful apartment complex. Secondly, since I don't know trout about military, I'm going to push through and just wing it because I never go any military training. I'll post fall by late this morning, I haven't done a damn thing other than to look at how all of you have done screwed up this fortress to high heaven and back. I'm so lost and confused in this place.
Oh, I will also be making a zoo!
So... the total of Spring is right now in video format. I'm not too impressed with myself as I had no clue what you all had done so far as I've been absent. I'll upload the video and post it tonight. It's really not spectacular. I did accidentally release some of the goblins, but that turned out to be not such a bad thing. I also don't know who we need to add to the new migrants.
EDIT:
What is the best file format to upload that will compress a video and keep a relatively good quality on fullscreen?
You could always put it on YouTube, possibly as a private video if you don't want random people seeing it. I don't think there is any realistic way you can attach video files at EoFF as the size of them would be way above our attachment restrictions (which we won't raise for this kind of thing).
Psy: Good mayor. Terrible city planner. :D
No kidding. Well, the problem is that the videos are about 4Gbs total, about an hour and a half. I'm going to trim out dead stuff, so it will look a little choppy. Further, I want to maintain the quality and upload everything as one video. Ugh. I think the next video will be done in Stone Sense totally, maybe... I dunno.
Sod off the pair of you, the bedroom design is amazing. And it's all around the central ramp to maximise pathfinding - and thus framerate - efficiency!
This is my general aim for things. But then, I don't like using ramps. Stairs are so much easier to work with!
_______________entrance________________
_forest__farms__stairs__farms___forest_
______barracks__stairs__barracks_______
_______storage__stairs__storage________
_____workshops__stairs__workshops______
__dining rooms__stairs__dining rooms___
______bedrooms__stairs__bedrooms_______
______bedrooms__stairs__bedrooms_______
______bedrooms__stairs__bedrooms_______
___noble rooms__stairs__noble rooms____
_________tombs__stairs__tombs__________
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
/////MINING/////stairs/////MINING//////
*****CAVERN*****stairs*****CAVERN******
********FUN*****stairs*****FUN*********
Also, 4GB!? An hour and a half!? Did you record your entire playthrough? xD Man, I spent about 12 hours doing my turn, it'd be crazy boring as a video. Did you talk through the video and record that, too? That would be interesting. But probably not interesting enough to warrant an hour and a half of listening. Definitely would cut it down to 30 minutes or so, tops, and post it in ten-minute videos turn-by-turn.
But then, I'm terrible at editing videos and I don't think DF really shines when it comes to that end of things.
That or you should offer them up as we have with images taken from to note key events and text. Some of us don't have enough spare time to watch a DF movie!
Yeah, as of right now, it's just an hour and a half with some dead time here and there. I'm working on cropping this trout, but it's going to be choppy. I might just screen shot from the video and figure out what was going on. If I make a video for summer, I'll probably put it into sections that link together.
Is Iceglow criticizing someone for length? I smell hypocrisy.
There is a video-making function in the game, yes? I seem to recall Necronopticus using such to record his caravan trap shenanigans.
There isn't he used Fraps to record the video. Same program many of us use to get screen captures on Stonesense and various other games.
As for me sitting here criticizing on length? Well, my updates were at least posts, you could wander off, pee, make a cuppa and get some dinner in before coming back and reading another couple of paragraphs about what happened and not have missed anything. A video however, you will miss important things going on and 1.5 hours of video of DF is not going to be the most entertaining of things, especially if theres a quiet season much like some of the ones I experienced in year 2.
If only they made some kind of function in videos where you could cause a video to freeze it's position. You could click on a button to make it do this, or something, and then when you want it to carry on from that position, you could click that button again to make it continue.
If only there were such a way!
But 1.5 hours is too much. 30 minutes or even 10 minutes would be far more ideal, but we'll see how it goes! I hope there is a running commentary!
I completely agree. I'm going to post-pone and let someone else go over and do some random tests with video. I'm really interested in making this a plausible video. I can definitely get everything synced well, I just hate typing everything out, mainly because I don't know who is who yet, and I need to figure out what is going on since I played UPDATES ago.
No worries. Just don't Marick this thing. ;)
EDIT: Wait, are you asking for someone else to have this year's turn or are you wanting to let someone else do tests with video?
god yes please let paul or somebody who knows how to fix the important things go before marick, god damn interior decor my arse
i'm saying someone else take this year's turn. My main plan is to organize all these damn rocks you have laying around everywhere, build a zoo, build a better apartment area, and smooth areas.
Dan should take a turn then :P