What do you call a lot with 50 chevys and 1 Ford?
A junkyard & a way to get home. Lawl
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What do you call a lot with 50 chevys and 1 Ford?
A junkyard & a way to get home. Lawl
"Do you know any jokes about sodium?"
"Na."
My favorite joke of all time:
Why did the chicken cross the Möbius Strip?
(SPOILER)To get to the same side!
Werner Heisenberg was pulled over by a cop on the highway. "Do you know how fast you were going?" the cop demanded. "No, but I know where I am," said Heisenberg.
Oh my goodness, I was making up these knock knock jokes to piss off my 4-year-old cousin because they kept going over her head. I had a whole bunch, but these are the two I remember.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Doctor.
Doctor Who?
You really should watch that show, it's great!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Sorry, UPS tried to get ahold of you three times; You'll have to come to the office to pick up your package.
The true punchline to this joke is "You just said it!", which is equal parts not funny and infuriating.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jinx
A piece of string walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." So the string leaves.
A bit later the string walks back into the bar, but now he's all roughed up, looped and tangled and some threads are coming loose at the ends.
The bartender says "Aren't you the string that was just in here?" The string replies "No, I'm a frayed knot."
The correct punchline is:Quote:
Originally Posted by ShaunaThe true punchline to this joke is "You just said it!", which is equal parts not funny and infuriating.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jinx
"Doctor Who?"
"OOOOOOHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH! OOOOOOOHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOH!"
And then you keep it going until they leave.
Parker cannot tell a knock knock joke to save her life. Bless it.
One day when the professor walked to the black board, she noticed someone
had handwritten the word 'penis' in tiny small letters. She turned around,
scanned the class looking for the guilty face. Finding none, she quickly
erased it,and began her class.
The next day she went into the room, and she saw, in larger letters, the word 'penis' again on the black board. Again,she looked around in vain for the culprit, but found none, so she proceeded with the day's lesson.
Every morning, for about a week, she went into the classroom and found the same word written on the board, each day's word, larger than the previous day's word.
Finally, one day, she walked in,expecting to be greeted by the
same word on the board, but instead, found the words,
"The more you rub it, the bigger it gets!"
A human, an elf, and a dwarf all walk into a bar. The human turns to the dwarf and says, "You're lucky you're so short... That hurt like mad."
How do you embarrass an archaeologist?
Give him a used tampon and ask which period it's from
What do you call 10 Taurens and a Gnome in a field? A good game of 5-a-side football!
/badumtishwowhumour