Pedophilia. Is it a problem, and is there a solution?

Uh, Alice, homosexuality, heterosexuality, and pedophelia are all EXACTLY like one another. Sexual orientations are a complete mystery, but they behave exactly like one another in all notable ways. The only thing that differs is the object of the desire... but the desire itself is the same.

I know you'd like to believe that pedophiles are monsters, I know I would love dearly to say "they're not human" and leave it at that. I don't know what makes them what they are, no more than I know what makes one strait or gay, but it's all different facets of the same thing.

What makes pedophelia forbidden isn't about the desire, it's about the ACT itself. Children cannot understand what's happening, they can't participate, and the emotional trauma is profound... as a psychologist, I know full well the damage that child molesters leave in their wake. Little difference between a child molester or a strait/gay rapist. Except, children are less equipped to deal with, or recover from, such acts.

I think people are viewing this wrong, pedophilla is a sexual fetish, not a crime itself. A crime however would be child molestation/rape/whatever. Pedophilla itself is quite simply, feeling sexually oriented to someone that is underaged (how underaged is up to you now).

Frankly, i feel people that use the dealth penalty or say they should die or *insert torture here* are no better off than anyone committing the crime(molestation/rape/etc...not pedophillia) themselves. I would sugguest maybe talking to the person to actually initiated on their fantasies, and maybe try to pinpoint the problem and help them out. However that does not mean they did not commit offense, but saying they need to die for that seems a bit harsh IMO. Some time under bars and maybe some psychological help to control their sexual desires so they wont harm a child.

Now the question i am wondering is, what if the child is consent and wants it? Sure the child might not know enough, but what if he/she said yes? and in the end the child and the adult had a real relationship that wasnt so bad off? Would that change anything? Of course this ignores legal actions taken upon the person but i am just presenting the case that, in the event the child is not mentally scarred, but actually had a real relationship that lasted through the years, would people view it any different than other relationships?

EDIT: Usunda- I wouldnt know about child having to participate or not, but from what i read when i was curious one time...a child even before puberty, CAN orgasm and the sort, however they will not produce any sperm or semen of the sort. I even went to some msg boards where people said they have done that stuff, but it was just a dry ejaculation and it has no difference to any of the orgasms that we feel when we have puberty(except of course its no longer a dry one).

What i am trying to say is, i aint sure if a child can participate or not, they obviously could to some degree if they are conscious to what they are doing (and i feel some are more than others...we give children too little credit sometimes).

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Originally Posted by lionx

EDIT: Usunda- I wouldnt know about child having to participate or not, but from what i read when i was curious one time...a child even before puberty, CAN orgasm and the sort, however they will not produce any sperm or semen of the sort. I even went to some msg boards where people said they have done that stuff, but it was just a dry ejaculation and it has no difference to any of the orgasms that we feel when we have puberty(except of course its no longer a dry one).

What i am trying to say is, i aint sure if a child can participate or not, they obviously could to some degree if they are conscious to what they are doing (and i feel some are more than others...we give children too little credit sometimes).

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That's sick that that is actually known. :/

Its not sick, its just real. Plus i am sure it was plenty pleasureable for them, google it if you like. Its nothing sick at all...i dont see where people get that @_@ why be sick of something that could happen with your body? But eh personal things...

i really dont see how its sick, i think its just more suppressed between people, you DONT say this to other people hence it would be more known. I mean you dont go up to your friend and go "o hey around 8 i did...blah blah". But to me its not a surprise at all, it just happens, some of us become sexually aware eariler than others, so whats the difference here? @_@ *ends rambling..*

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Originally Posted by Alice

Pedophelia is not a sexual orientation... if it were then ud chose male over female children, when in actuality u just like em young.. thats not an orientation, that is a fetish... i dont think u know what these words mean so go look em up,

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So, what's my orientation? I'm bisexual, by your logic, I can't exist. Just because pedophelia is an has nothing to do with gender, does not disqualify it from being an orientation. Oh, and a great many pedophiles do prefer male or female over the other. Can't tell you why it works differently from case to case. My guess is that one can have more than one orientation at a time, hence bisexuals/etc.

I don't know why you can't understand that... que sera, sera.

EDIT: Uh, Catboy, that's just sick... and actually, one cannot achieve climax until a certain point in puberty, which (to your credit) does usually occur before fertility, it has to do with how the brain works. The nerves just aren't connected right until that time. But EVEN IF said child (early teen) enjoys the activity, that doesn't mitigate the emotional damage. In fact, it might sometimes create worse issues than typical molestation. Hard to tell, it's often very hard to tell due to all kinds of mitigating details.

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Originally Posted by udsuna

one cannot achieve climax until a certain point in puberty.

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I've been climaxing since I was 8 years old. I also don't see how a child experimenting with their bodily reactions is sick. I think you're the sick one for condemning them for their curiosity.

I have links if you want them Usunda, if you want PM me, i think its too much for a forum for public anyway.

They could climax with pleasure just no sperm. Its dry is all. I dont think it necessarily will create emotional damage, it might not, i mean with the right nuturing we might just get someone who is more sexually open about these things where sex is NOT something forbidden or something like that. And i see nothing wrong with that really.

Yeah its your body its good to know more about it when you can and if its this form then yeah go ahead. Just because you think its sick doesnt mean the act itself is that.

EDIT: Just wanna make it clear, orgasm and ejaculation are seperate.

Well, that's nice to know...:barf:

No, its not nice to talk about how sexually advanced children are but comments like "omfgUarzsickz!" in a thread that ties in with just that is childish. The facts may not be nice but theyre still the facts so if you dont want to hear it I wouldnt ask for it or read it.

I would have no problem with a 8-10 or so year old had a relationship with an older person.

However ONLY if the child was mentally matured enough to understand. I imagine most are not. This ain't that they derive pleasure.. this is that they understand what a relationship is and want to commence one. I don't think I have yet meet one person that young who understood those things... but then again.. I tend not to "hang" wiht people that much younger then me... wonder if I have some prejudice there.. perhaps.

Before I run about shouting "I DISAGREE I DISAGREE" I want to point out some things that, while they are NOT known fact, ARE on scientific horizons as we speak, and will perhaps let themselves be known in due time.

First of all, there does SEEM to be a difference betweem homo/heterosexuality and sexual paraphilias. That difference being that it is possible that most sexual paraphilias are due to external events and a person's enviornment, while its possible that homo/heterosexuality is at least in part, determined genetically. No, there is no concrete evidence to PROVE either of these things, but neither is there concrete evidence to disprove either of these things. My point is that while homo/heterosexuality is possibly a very natural condition, paraphilias usually aren't. (By natural, I mean something that would have happened anyway, regardless of enviornment).

Bisexuality, as far as my readings have taken me, is still very mysterious. Some people classify it as a paraphilia and some don't. Also, please remember that in the above I'm discussing theory, yes, but VERY plausible theory.

Second of all, we all like weird stuff. Hell, you can even blame pedophilia on ancient women who started shaving all their hair off to look younger and more appealing to their mates. However, any action that involves bridging the gap between a paraphilia fantasy and the real world IS wrong. Even looking at something in real life is taboo. Think it's a double standard? How do you feel when people leer at you? I'm not a child, and I haven't had the appearance of a child for some time in my life, but I STILL don't like it when men, even attractive men, stare at any part of me. If you like to fantisize about children, well if you told me that I might think it was awful. But you don't have to tell me that, do you? Just like I don't have to tell you about MY weird fantasies.

Lastly, a person that can rub their genetalia can experience pleasurable sensations typically associated with climax. This includes children.

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Originally Posted by Necronopticous

I've been climaxing since I was 8 years old.

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>>> soo.. i wasnt the only one.. :D

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Originally Posted by udsuna

Uh, Alice, homosexuality, heterosexuality, and pedophelia are all EXACTLY like one another. Sexual orientations are a complete mystery, but they behave exactly like one another in all notable ways. The only thing that differs is the object of the desire... but the desire itself is the same.

I know you'd like to believe that pedophiles are monsters, I know I would love dearly to say "they're not human" and leave it at that. I don't know what makes them what they are, no more than I know what makes one strait or gay, but it's all different facets of the same thing.

What makes pedophelia forbidden isn't about the desire, it's about the ACT itself. Children cannot understand what's happening, they can't participate, and the emotional trauma is profound... as a psychologist, I know full well the damage that child molesters leave in their wake. Little difference between a child molester or a strait/gay rapist. Except, children are less equipped to deal with, or recover from, such acts.

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I completely agree. How can somebody say homosexuality is perfectly acceptable, but that paedophilia is somehow sick and disgusting? As far as I'm concerned, they're both sick and unnatural, but at least homosexuals I don't look down on simply because I disagree with their sexual preference.

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Originally Posted by fire_of_avalon

That difference being that it is possible that most sexual paraphilias are due to external events and a person's enviornment, while its possible that homo/heterosexuality is at least in part, determined genetically.

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Of course. Homosexuality is genetic. Just like celebacy :rolleyes2: . It's not a subject of what can and can't be proven, it's what can and can't be logically supported by scientific evidence. Paedophilia and homosexuality are alike in the sense that not only is it an attraction that is unnatural for reproduction, but that nobody knows exactly what causes it. A lot of people have different beliefs as to what leads to certain attractions, but none have been proven, and very few have any evidence at all that can be logically used to support them.

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Originally Posted by ShunNakamura

I would have no problem with a 8-10 or so year old had a relationship with an older person. ... However ONLY if the child was mentally matured enough to understand.

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If I have an eight-year-old daughter and I find out she's having a sexual relationship with an older guy, he'll be lucky if I don't beat him to death. But I'll do my best to do just that. No child at eight or ten years old is mature enough to carry on a physical relationship. Hell, most teenagers aren't mature enough to carry on a physical relationship.

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Originally Posted by Sasquatch

I completely agree. How can somebody say homosexuality is perfectly acceptable, but that paedophilia is somehow sick and disgusting? As far as I'm concerned, they're both sick and unnatural, but at least homosexuals I don't look down on simply because I disagree with their sexual preference.

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Yeah, because we know a relationship between two consenting adults is just the same as 40 yr old dude screwing a 6 year old. Yep! :greenie:

Put everything else aside: all the theories, all the scientific findings, ect. and lets just pretend homosexuality and pedophilia are both just something people wake up one day and decide they're going to practice by sheer will (that's smurfing stupid btw): The bottom line is with pedophiles, there's a child, who not in control, and is, by definition, reguardless, being raped. Someone is being hurt. A child is being hurt. But with homosexuality, it's between two consenting people, just like heterosexuals. So why the hell should you care?

I never mentioned anything about making homosexual sex illegal, or imprisoning/torturing/killing those who act on their homosexuality. This thread isn't about homosexuality, it's about paedophilia, and the actions of paedophilia. If we relate heterosexuality to homosexuality, in which both cases involve consenting adults, then we could also involve prostitution, which involves two consenting adults, or beastiality, if we make a rule that it's alright as long as the animal doesn't try to get away. Hey, it's all within consent, right?

According to some people here, the old man and the child are both consenting, which would mean that's perfectly acceptable in some cases. Is that right? Of course it's a matter of opinion, and we all have our own. Just like how you think that it's stupid to say choice plays a part in determining sexual orientation, and how I think saying "smurfing" anything is stupid.

If you read the rest of my latest post here, I further describe the relationship between "sexual orientations" such as homosexuality and paedophilia.