The Drunk Thread

Spice Girls and Rum and curry and dancing mmmmmm!!!

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Originally Posted by Lockharted

Spice Girls and Rum and curry and dancing mmmmmm!!!

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You really are my soul mate.

I can walk like an Egyptiaaannn

By Shorty's request (I can't believe I haven't told this story sixteen thousand times on EoFF, but searching "+bleys +catbox" turns up blank)

The first time I ever got drunk, I trusted my Aunt Patty to introduce me into the world of drinking.

The bitch fed me tequila.

She said "When you can't feel your lips anymore, that's how you know you're drunk." Exhaustive experience since then proves this statement is bulltrout, but that is what was said.

Five minutes later, I could still feel my lips, but standing up was the most fun I'd ever had in my life.

Ten minutes later, I pissed in the catbox.

The next morning, Patty thought she was upset, but you should have seen the looks the cat was giving me.

Additional highlights: I tried to eat my grad ring. Patty had a couple of her married friends over, and I couldn't tell which one was the girl. I believe I attempted to sing.

Daaaaang this wine.

It is 10pm. I have just finished watching Red Dwarf. I am drowning my sorrows by drinking premium strength lager.

I am traffic cone-hugging, pavement-licking kershnickered.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Citizen Bleys

By Shorty's request (I can't believe I haven't told this story sixteen thousand times on EoFF, but searching "+bleys +catbox" turns up blank)

The first time I ever got drunk, I trusted my Aunt Patty to introduce me into the world of drinking.

The bitch fed me tequila.

She said "When you can't feel your lips anymore, that's how you know you're drunk." Exhaustive experience since then proves this statement is bulltrout, but that is what was said.

Five minutes later, I could still feel my lips, but standing up was the most fun I'd ever had in my life.

Ten minutes later, I pissed in the catbox.

The next morning, Patty thought she was upset, but you should have seen the looks the cat was giving me.

Additional highlights: I tried to eat my grad ring. Patty had a couple of her married friends over, and I couldn't tell which one was the girl. I believe I attempted to sing.

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ohhhh you posted it in this thread. I got an email notification but looked in the other thread and it wasn't there so I thought it was deleted!

Tequila's a hell of a [strike]drug[/strike] liquor.

Tequila is brewed in the blackest bowels of Hell by Lucifer himself, out of Hitler's piss.

EDIT: wait, you got an email notification? You have a bot that crawls the forums looking for a mention of your own name? Vaaaaaaaain.

Although. I can't say no to shots of citrus patron.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Citizen Bleys

Tequila is brewed in the blackest bowels of Hell by Lucifer himself, out of Hitler's piss

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You need better tequila.

TEQUILA IS AWESOME.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Lockharted

TEQUILA IS AWESOME.

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I LOVE YOU MORE AND MORE EACH DAY :love:

HEY I'M DRUNK
I'M NOT SO DRUNK
AND WE ARE THE GAME DRUNKS

THE GAME IS PLAYING ITSELF SEPHEX

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Lockharted

TEQUILA IS AWESOME.

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Tequila couldn't be more vile if it came from the Devil's anus. But that's never stopped me from simply taking Tequila shots straight with no salt or lemon/lime to demonstrate to my friends that they are all pussies.