EVIL GENIE

WHY DID I GET BANNED WHAT THE HELL?!

Granted, Mars is peaceful.

I wish for several solutions to one specific problem.

Do not incur the wrath of either Evil Genie or BoB. And I also want a refund from the person who said that I'd been granted the self restraint to stay away from this thread.

Granted, your worst enemy has been brainstorming ways to destroy you, and they have suddenly thought of many different ideas.

I wish for something evil to happen.

Granted. The person that granted you self restraint is revoking it :doublecolbert: You will now become a slob, deteriorating in front of this thread for all eternity.

I wish I had a time machine.

Granted, it's bed shaped and can only move forward at 6 hour incruments and needs a 12 hour charge. Also you need to lay in it awhile before it kicks in. Comes with free visions of alternate universes.

I wish I could breathe underwater as well as dry land.

Granted. You are now a frog. Cirno is going to freeze you though...

I wish the missing ______ are all found and returned

Granted, all the ________ are all found and returned. Mad Libs are all filled in and party goers are bored. And tests are all answered and students all pass everything forever and the world grows dumber. The Big Brain am winning again!

I wish I was one of the 2/3 that don't shatter when frozen.

Granted, you implode instead, creating a blackhole that eats your lunch money.

I wish that everyone was an admin

Granted. The member 'everyone' was made an admin and the site was burned to the ground in the ensuing riot.

I wish I had one of those.

Granted. You now have an ensuing riot inside your bedroom.

I wish grapefruits were more delicious.

Granted, but you're now allergic and suffer intense allergic reactions from the mere sight of grapefruit.

I wish I was good at kung fu!

Done, but someone better at kung fu comes along and beats you up anyway.

I wish I had an unlimited supply of Nutella.

Granted, your supply covers the entire universe and drowns everyone, eventually becoming an omnipotent being that solves pi.

I wish that jackie chan had a unibrow, that was unshavable

Granted. You also have no eyes, so you can't see it.

I wish for data that entails what exactly happens beyond the event horizon of a black hole without having to go there myself :p

Granted, but it's result BLOWS YOUR MIND. (hint: fireninjas abound)

I wish I hadn't eaten so much. :(

Granted, your entire life you have been hungry, barely eating enough to survive. You are now a sliver of a man.

I wish I had complete happiness.