T: Stop it whore. Quit seducing my men.
J: Nick is playing Saints Row 2 now, so all of his commentary will be of his shenanigans there.
T: Jumping on the bed with heels. Ooh more lamps. Hey I can’t pick this one up. Haha I can pick it up if I stand on her body.
J: So he’s running around inside one of the cribs, throwing lamps and chairs at the strippers.
T: Oh ho! I threw her off the edge.
J: Anyway, this is the Most Hardcore Gamer speech.
T: I punched his hooker, so she punched me, so he shot her. That’s some loyal men.
J: Are you, are you even going to say hello? We need to do this speech.
T: What, I just bumped her and she died, I didn’t even throw her.
J: Now while Saints Row 2 is probably not worthy of being called a Hardcore Game, it is good fun. Our nominees are supposedly renowned for playing hardcore games, and playing a lot of them, and playing them often.
T: I’m gonna make a big pile of stuff! Probably not hookers though, that’d be weird.
J: The exact criteria for Most Hardcore Gamer is really undefined, like most of the Ciddies. Plenty of members have already voiced their issues with the nominees. I’ll pick on I’m My Own MILF since I know he’s both a suitably hardcore gamer and a complainer.
T: Was that racist?
J: If you look at this blog entry, MILFy talks about his deep love of “spergy” “picomanagement”. I don’t even know what that means.
T: Did I..? I just got 28 respect for throwing a hooker at a wall.
J: But suffice to say, there is something about MILF’s gaming that is on another level that ordinary folks like me can’t comprehend.
T: Ah! Oh god, I’m on fire!
J: Now I’m not here saying that MILF should win by any means. And I’m not dissing Wolf Kanno. The guy plays a lot of games and he likes his imports.
T: Where do I get food? I need at least one food to revive them, so they’re dead to me.
J: All I’m trying to say is that we need to start figuring out some unified system of measurement or something, to make nominating and voting for this Ciddie easier.
T: That zombie is on fire…ah man now I’m on fire. And, I’m dead. Smoked :hahaha: How fitting.
J: And so as we start bringing this fantastic, quality speech to a close, I just want to say “may the best gamer win.”
T: Where are all my homies? They weren’t the zombies were they? HOLY tit THEY JUST SPAWNED. And the hookers too. I have a pool.
J: And by the way, this is also known as the Best Basement Dweller Award. So enjoy your victory, nerds.
T: I was trying to get her into the pool but she hit the pillar. Oh man, I got
two stars for throwing her that time. Man, I don’t know why people say GTA is the game for killing hookers. This game has a lot on GTA. I probably shouldn’t divulge this… You’re still writing everything aren’t you?
J: Yes, yes I am. See you next time!
T: It’s not foreplay without smurf?
