Let's Play Resident Evil 2 badly

:stare: :stare: :stare: :stare:

KICK HIS ASS, OLD MANUS!

"ada wait :("

Only just seen this and it is my new favourite thread.

Leon's flowchart of handling things:

Did something happen?

Yes --> ADA!!!!
No --> ADA!!!!

LET'S PLAY RESIDENT EVIL 2: BOSS FIGHTS ON POINTLESS TRAIN PLATFORMS EDITION

http://i.imgur.com/0Z7J1j7.png

http://i.imgur.com/0keJ3EZ.png

You may notice that Birkin's face has now actually moved to his left breast. Brings a whole new meaning to 'heart in your mouth'.


http://i.imgur.com/Qjm4wAw.png

I decided to bring the submachine gun along for this battle, as god knows it's not getting any use anywhere else. It turned out to be a pretty dumb idea. This thing isn't as powerful as I thought.


http://i.imgur.com/FhgVYXT.png

But just as I expend pretty much all the ammunition (and about 3 first aid sprays), he stumbles.

http://i.imgur.com/AbSAaRH.png

And jumps off the edge!

The platform comes to a shuddering halt in the middle of the descent.


http://i.imgur.com/L4lUIJT.png

Leon informs Ada that it is regrettable that she is injured, but for the sake of gameplay she needs to be dropped as a supporting character for the moment and getting impaled by a giant zombie hand is the most convenient way of achieving this.

(SPOILER)ADAAAAAAAAA


Time to find a way to get this platform moving. More vent crawling!

http://i.imgur.com/J1sasec.png

http://i.imgur.com/glyh1xG.png

We drop into an unknown part of the factory. But...

http://i.imgur.com/zM9b0dY.png

The platform starts moving again anyway! For smurf's sake, Ada!


http://i.imgur.com/VGgOq4e.png

I guess now we have to try and get down there. We're in some sort of engineering sector of the complex. This place looks like it cost billions to excavate and build.


http://i.imgur.com/RLEgrFV.png

The lickers down here have evolved into extra powerful versions of themselves that can be right bastards when they attack in groups (which they always do). Good job we upgraded the shotgun to deliver maximum pain!


http://i.imgur.com/tZr7yuz.png

http://i.imgur.com/vXpcq42.png

I can't even figure out whether this is just a dodgy translation or this is actually where they melt disobedient workers :grover:


http://i.imgur.com/F00p1A6.png

Got a feeling we'll be going that route soon. Also, note that after all this time plodding around with emblems and plugs, the master key to the secret underground hi tech research complex is just a fugging bog-standard lever lock open-the-shed-door key. :argh:

Down the lift.

http://i.imgur.com/XZvzGYs.png

"What's the problem? You got an issue with what a real woman looks like?"


http://i.imgur.com/emSzC0H.png

Disgusting hambeasts. Welp, looks like we're back down here. My first move was to go into the little office to see if I could kill Sherry, but it appears Claire locked the door. Bummer. Let's go and pick up Ada.


http://i.imgur.com/D7fYhYt.png

Ada? ADA? ADAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Ah well, further into the complex I suppose.

http://i.imgur.com/hpQTFLT.png

...Oh, for smurf's sake.


http://i.imgur.com/zYJ2qIj.png

Yep, it's this all over again.

http://i.imgur.com/QZ0OMER.png

http://i.imgur.com/IbjfkYS.png

And we finally get to the door Claire partly unlocked in Scenario A! We can't go inside yet though, there's still more fetch-questing to be had.

http://i.imgur.com/ODpR2Ge.png

I just took this screenshot to show off how smurfing awesome the upgraded shotgun is. Limbs everywhere.

http://i.imgur.com/f5do4rI.png

There's also the anti-BOW sprinkler that we ignored in Claire's scenario. I don't know whether my game bugged or anything but I switched it on and it was totally useless. Nothing happened. :argh:

Ah, well. We can still pick up this bad boy in the next room:

http://i.imgur.com/LjrF9Qr.png

A flamethrower! Now, if only there were some highly-flammable organic monsters nearby that I could test this on...


http://i.imgur.com/opkrsRc.png

Excellent. Flame-grilled zombie plant, coming up!

http://i.imgur.com/BV777gd.png

Have it, you numerously-tentacled bastards...! ...Hang on, what...?

http://i.imgur.com/W11smwO.png

That's right, it's absolutely sodding useless. :grover: Back in the item box you go...


http://i.imgur.com/fWysOCy.png

Further into the labs, taking care of a gaggle of lickers as we go.

http://i.imgur.com/DepHuA3.png

It's the giant moth again. It is such an out of place fight. You don't even actually have to fight it, really.

http://i.imgur.com/Ofcnm2a.png

Now we've fiddled with the computer in here, we can finally get into the big locked door from earlier!


http://i.imgur.com/oHrcTmf.png

This place had better be packed with treasures.

http://i.imgur.com/XZs2fKQ.png

Nope, more lickers.

http://i.imgur.com/0imdMs9.png

And a bloke with eerily long legs...

http://i.imgur.com/l6jVTTH.png

ALL THAT IS IN HERE IS A DAMN CLIP FOR THE SUBMACHINE GUN I DON'T EVEN NEED IT ANYMORE I SWEAR TO GOD


http://i.imgur.com/uqbTFTk.png

Let's get some real goodies.

http://i.imgur.com/TRbN5MO.png

Now we have the fixings for the best weapon in the game, outside of the bonus ones. The upgraded magnum turns every enemy into mincemeat.


http://i.imgur.com/d92o8Te.png

And what better way to introduce it!

http://i.imgur.com/2AleHkq.png

We also pick up the key to the power room, which was locked waaaaaay back when we entered the facility. Let's head back.


http://i.imgur.com/vHbf0KJ.png

Annette again!

http://i.imgur.com/E5mY0cS.png

"If you're after my husband's last remaining Pez dispenser, you're never going to get it!"

http://i.imgur.com/ZZwGDWm.png

But suddenly, Mr. X busts in again!

http://i.imgur.com/SAqKRSp.png

Piece of piss.


http://i.imgur.com/4Z4o246.png

http://i.imgur.com/RUi9VdU.png

Oh for God's sake will you just go home?


http://i.imgur.com/qsWOhRk.png

Wait. Despite having just filled him full of lead moments earlier with no hesitation, Leon is now backing away slowly, cowering in fear.

http://i.imgur.com/b7EiR2e.png

"Help! I need a plot device to get me out of this cutscene!"


http://i.imgur.com/Gvy2g2K.png

ADA! (SPOILER)AAAAAAAAAA

http://i.imgur.com/fH9AyHO.png

"Stand back Leon, while I very slowly fire bullets from my pea shooter while standing perfectly still!"

http://i.imgur.com/uqYhEjR.png

http://i.imgur.com/ETU1oUz.png

http://i.imgur.com/LNTNI.gif

http://i.imgur.com/In5pTZz.png

"No not the face! That's the money!"


http://i.imgur.com/NSbKya5.png

http://i.imgur.com/zBAYCZP.png

For the first time in the game, Mr. X shows any sort of bleeding.


http://i.imgur.com/CfgGrNg.png

http://i.imgur.com/TJBuHmc.png

http://i.imgur.com/lCcdSSW.png

Smoked. Is anyone keeping track of the falling-over-the-railings count?

CHOKESLAM! CHOKESLAM ALL THE WAY FROM HELL MY GAWD!

And I lost track of how many people fell over the railing a while back.

http://rockpaperwatch.files.wordpres...s-he-melts.gif

Thanks for the laughs. This has been a good read.

Just in time for the ending, sharky.

So Mr. X just threw himself into a huge bowl of molten metal. While you stop and try and think of a reason why there is a giant smelting pit in an underground laboratory, let's get on with the game...

http://i.imgur.com/qI4VskR.png

Leon goes to help his selfless saviour. Are they going to have a moment?

http://i.imgur.com/EZwq7PI.png

They've known each other literally for a few hours and have only had about two or three stilted, wooden conversations but they're already in love! God bless America.


http://i.imgur.com/9uyDMvK.png

Oh yeah then she dies.

Time to get the hell out of dodge, chief. Leon leaves her corpse there to melt. :grover:

MEANWHILE IN AN UNKNOWN LOCATION

http://i.imgur.com/M0V9MCo.png

Oh, trout.


http://i.imgur.com/pqOyMCe.png

A call from Claire. She tells us to pick up Sherry in the locked office. You've got to be kidding. We've only seen this girl briefly for about 5 seconds earlier in the game and Claire's trying to offload her trout onto us?


http://i.imgur.com/v8ONPyG.png

Don't ask me where I got the key from, because I don't remember.

http://i.imgur.com/K26rgiD.png

Goddamn it she's still alive!

Now that the master key has formulated itself into Leon's pocket, let's use the emergency function in the emergency lift.

http://i.imgur.com/Lvd4GtO.png

http://i.imgur.com/u5Ahp5C.png

To the train and our ticket out of here.

http://i.imgur.com/fxcRxfZ.png

No power supply in the emergency evacuation train? Great job, Umbrella! :wacky: I suppose we'll go and turn it on then.

http://i.imgur.com/4ie51jO.png

A detonation countdown! This is it!


http://i.imgur.com/hPMclwU.png

Just insert a few plugs here...

http://i.imgur.com/UfwMbDm.png

This can't be good.


http://i.imgur.com/JZujyuo.png

http://i.imgur.com/prBGVn6.png

http://i.imgur.com/qMgRuSe.png

"How did you know that the secret to me gaining my full power is a bath in molten lead!?"

Mr. X 2.0 decides to throw his previous tactics of calmly plodding around throwing punches out the window, and instead whizzes around the area, bashing the trout out of you. He takes a fair amount of hits with the upgraded magnum and is actually pretty hard. As such, I didn't get around to any screenshots until this point:

http://i.imgur.com/Dnz35my.png

A mysterious voice that is definitely not Ada calls for Leon!

http://i.imgur.com/FDwERWR.png

ROWCKET LAWNCHAIR

Getting into a position to fire the damn thing is the hardest part here.

http://i.imgur.com/ImQpxZw.png

Hasta la vista?


http://i.imgur.com/GnLQwvz.png

http://i.imgur.com/P3wXpu2.png

http://i.imgur.com/ZFUo32u.png

It's funny because the moment I took the screenshot, the screen flickered and his explosion disappeared, leaving only the prerendered background :monster:

Anyway, now that the train is powered, can we finally get moving?

http://i.imgur.com/HljTbyf.png

http://i.imgur.com/Zm3KMC6.png

Let's go! Picking up Claire on the way!

http://i.imgur.com/yOunWv2.png

Unfortunately no, she isn't standing in the middle of the track in this picture.


http://i.imgur.com/FUS6lwW.png

It's the same FMV that Claire had! Capcom you bastards! :argh:


[SCENE SKIP]


http://i.imgur.com/Txj1CC4.png

"Hang on, we're 3D rendered again. Does this mean...?"

http://i.imgur.com/L0xMx4a.png

"SURPRISE MOTHERsmurfERS"
(Is what he would say if he actually had a mouth at this point)

http://i.imgur.com/b1Wx67h.png

http://i.imgur.com/pNqR0nI.png

http://i.imgur.com/iZN9UHR.png

After Mr. X, this fight is a piece of cake. To defeat William Birkin, shoot at it until it dies.


http://i.imgur.com/WKCWMXQ.png

http://i.imgur.com/MY7hUEo.png

http://i.imgur.com/d4DYaFe.png

WWE's Rikishi, rest in peace.


ENDING FMV TIME


http://i.imgur.com/avMYwms.png

http://i.imgur.com/FkM3xAb.png

Holy trout. :stare:

http://i.imgur.com/HJh4aOr.png

So basically Bill is still alive and Leon has locked himself out of the train carriage. Tension!

http://i.imgur.com/c21Dxpr.png

"Trust me, I saw this in Speed!"

http://i.imgur.com/52FjyUX.png

Sherry decides to finally make herself useful after four hours of gameplay. I refuse to believe someone of even Sherry's size could easily fit through that gap.

http://i.imgur.com/BLaWTkC.png

"Which button to press to stop the train from blowing up!?"

http://i.imgur.com/odbDrWx.png

"WHICH BUTTON TO PRESS?"

http://i.imgur.com/bb41AMz.png

Oh, right, the big red one. :grover:

http://i.imgur.com/Pfxcrmc.png

President Deling morphs into his final form.

http://i.imgur.com/dJdwviF.png

The music reaches a crescendo as the timer hits zero!

http://i.imgur.com/MnrnDPJ.png

Not even Sauron is safe from this smurfing game.

http://i.imgur.com/E40mESk.png

Tell me they're all dead.


http://i.imgur.com/apU4AjD.png

Sake.

And finally...

http://i.imgur.com/48lP7np.png

"Screw this cop trout, I'm off to go work for the president!"

http://i.imgur.com/stHkmvD.png

That's that, ladies and gentlemen. Took slightly longer than it should have, and my pathetic abilities at the game have ensured I have unlocked absolutely nothing for a future playthrough! :zombie:

Let's Play and Thread of the Year, right here.

Well done, I have enjoyed this one immensely. RE2 is still my favorite of the series to this day, and I used to play the game obsessively.

Well done! That was fun :p

excellent work, highlight for me was the metal slug reference in the last post, heard it in my head straight away

Top turn. :up: Shame though, would've enjoyed the adventures of Tofu...

I laughed, I cried, and you, sir, deserve a golden chocobo. Adaaaaaaaaaaaa.