Quote:
Originally Posted by DMKA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DMKA
Don't try to put words in my mouth and then insult me for them. I never once said that young people are incapable of feeling romatic love. I just pointed out that most teenage "love" is all too often simply an exaggeration of infatuation, nothing more. Of course, there are exceptions.
Who really understands love, anyway?
People who try to say that their love is better than others' irk me. I have the same capacity to feel now as I did when I was twelve. I'm sure that the average adult relationship lasts about as long as the average teenage relationship, excluding marriage. :) Oh yes, many teenage relationships are simply based off of infatuation, but how many adult relationships aren't, either? ^_^
All the teenage relationships aren't based off of infatuation.. I think this has to do with the character of a person......with what he want from a relationship & how he\she want to be.............
Yeah, that kind of things happened to me. I met a real special person. It was with her that everything happened: my first kiss, the first time that I had sex and my first true love. But unfortunately she's gone and she'll never come back. It was a teen love, but I believe that was more powerful than any adult love. But, now all this belongs to the past...Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess_Yuna
Ooooh that's bad you loved her....but when you say she's gone & she'll naver come back????What do you mean?????
Yeah, loved her with all my life. She died by a car accident. It's going to make 2 years on December now.Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess_Yuna
That must hurt indeed. Sorry to hear that.
As for the argument at hand. Can we agree on this-
"Teen love whilst being able to exist is often times overexagerated by the teens involved. However, that does not make it any less possible for it to happen, just more likely for it to be thought to be there when it isn't." ?
If not it looks like we will go back to arguing extremes.
No problem, time heals all wounds...Quote:
Originally Posted by ShunNakamura
I'm glad this thread has come to something of an understanding. I can see where teenagers come from (Heh, I still am one, I probably don't have the right to discount myself however much I desire to.) when they take exception to being told their feelings are not 'right', as I suspect it would essentially be interpreted. Just like anyone else would hate being told that, but for a teenager it's often even worse because the sole reason, in their eyes, is older people thinking they know better (Whether or not they do is moot, the teenager's perspective is all that matters to them.).
I do think there are a lot of fake teen loves. I don't think there's any malevolence in it, I just think it's easier to claim that commitment when you don't know what it means and when it hasn't hurt you. The more that happens, the more jaded and slower to trust you'll become. It's an easy leap from there to consider your own feelings the most experienced and thus legitimate. But at the same time, there are genuine examples of teenage love. I've been one before, I got hurt badly, and now I'm one again, if you want to count 19 as teenage. My girl is two years younger than me and, without heaping too much praise of her maturity onto EoFF, I feel she has a similar capacity for love as I do. The thing is, making generalized if not blanket statements about teenagers in love will hastily be taken as an offensive statement by anyone who sees themselves as having been placed in that group.
Finally, as a point of interest, where do people believe there's an 'age', if you want to quantify it that way, when love will be more likely to be genuine than infatuation or fake? I mean, there's obviously a big difference between a 13/14 year old and a 17/18 year old. For my part, I'm not sure most adults know what love is anyway (And I have no guarantee I do either; it's merely the most powerful feeling I've experienced yet.), and I just try to judge based on individuals. Don't know that I always succeed, but I try.
Good point, but it doesn't help your argument. How many teenagers are looking for a serious, long-term relationship? Sure, there are some out there that are interested in a serious "romance" (I was one of them, damn that didn't work), but most are in it because they get to make out, or they get a ride around, or they get to look cool with their boyfriend/girlfriend. Or maybe just that they get somebody to pass secret notes to, or to call every night, or to talk sweet to, or whatever. Very rarely is a teenager interested in a long-term, serious relationship with somebody. Very rarely do teenagers look into morals, future, responsibility, etc. when they pursue a relationship. Now, of course not all adults do either, but everybody's got to admit that an adult relationship that both partners believe involves love is much more serious than the average teenage romance where both people say "I luv yoo" just because they like the sound of it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess_Yuna
It could be stated that the initial feeling of "love" that a teenager can feel in their first relationship may be solely due to the first time someone other than family has shown them affection. I can tell you that all the relationships (save maybe 2) that i new of my friends in highschool didnt last. Also that the majority of adults say that a teen cant understand love because of the stark lack of experiences.
It could also be said that An adult has been hardened by the same painful experiences that they say give them the idea of love better then a teen. With age comes experience and Wisodm, but it also brings predjudices. This cant be denied. Im an Adult. I should be on the side of the teens dont fully know love, and truthfully part of me believes that. I have given my heart to 3 Girls in my life ranging in time from 5th grade to now (im 23). By gave my heart i meant had feelings for them. 2 I told and 1 was a secret crush. One now that I like is different from the ones when i was younger. My experiences have changed how I view what it can be, but I must admit that the two younger ones were just as real to me at the time. And, that at the best of my understanding at the time, It was something real.
In the end, like I said, experience is why adults say teens dont understand. Experiences shape our views of a subject. But experience is a double edged sword.
I love David Hasselhoff. Is that wrong?
it depends on ur gender, sexuality and what u mean by "love"
I for one am not very open to "love" and have just been brought up that way, tis very depressing. I think one reason is cause i dont wanna turn out like on of my friends, hu was too open for love and pritty much gave herself away, and due to her bad relationships, has recently been getting mixed up in bad groups. Just gose to show that teen love can subject you to pains branching from just heart break.
If you need to "pass tests" to find out whether you're in love, it's a rather clear sign that you indeed aren't. :3Quote:
Originally Posted by Princess_Yuna
Having said that, you can find love at any age. Teenagers however want to test their abilities/limits/etc, and are hence more likely to jump around from person to person. Also, lack of experience often makes you believe you're in love, and later on you'll find out it was just infatuation, because you met someone that's just so much more.
It's rare, but possible. It doesn't matter, though. If you think you're in love, no matter if you actually are or not, you shouldn't let anyone tell you that you aren't. If you indeed aren't, you'll find out soon enough and can chalk one up on your experience board.