Give EoFF a tip about something in life. Anything at all...
Canoeing is much safer if you know how to swim. :)
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Give EoFF a tip about something in life. Anything at all...
Canoeing is much safer if you know how to swim. :)
Damn you! You've gotten EoFF's only Formula One fan all excited for this.
But hey, I'll contribute:
At a horrible dinner party? Want to check the time so you know how long it is until you can leave? Can't check your own watch because it'll come across as rude and offensive?
Look at someone else's watch.
If a girl tells you she likes anal, check to make sure she doesn't have a penis first.
Knife goes in, guts come out.
Everything is funnier if you try to do it with your feet.
What about walking?Quote:
Originally Posted by Rantzien
Don't walk through an airport turnstile sideways
Don't build an ejection seat into a helicopter.
Wear sunscreen
Make sure your cock (and indeed ballsack) is completely back in & secured before you zip back up...
Dont eat yellow snow.
If your sewing machine is being really difficult to start and it won't sew properly, and you made sure of all of the obvious, and also tried fixing the tension, your bobbin is probably broken. I didn't figure this out for a week and was miserable trying to sew with a broken bobbin. I still don't know what's exactly wrong with the bobbin, but when I switched them, everything was OK again.
When you are near a bomb, do not use fire if you are not flameproof.
Also always use scan the enemy, if you know it's weakness you can knock it down, and your team members will know the weak points as well for great effect!
Some of these are good! :D Others... not so much.
If you keep your hair short enough, you don't need someone to hold it for you when you're drunk and vomiting.
I forgot all about that. '90s as hell.Quote:
Originally Posted by Old Manus
Man who walk through turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.Quote:
Originally Posted by leader of mortals
Always check for toilet paper before using a public restroom.
If you want to spend as little time as possible at a boring party but make it seem like you were there for a long time for the sake of whoever's party it is:
1) Arrive late, go straight to the host and say "Hey! I've been looking all over for you, where've you been?"
2) Buy him/her a drink, a fancy one too so they'll remember it (or mix a drink if it's a house party). This is so the next day or whenever you'll see them next, you can say something like "Hey.. how about that crazy shot we took together? What a great night."
3) Locate the host's camera and have as many photos as you can taken of yourself with different people. Try to have a different drink in your hand each time and make your clothes look progressively more disheveled (you may want to wind forward the clock on the camera before each photo if you know the host looks at these details).
4) Leave discreetly. You should've been in and out in 15-20 mins.