Medical Advice

Lesson 1:
How to properly open up your bowels.
http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/f...87F1273D7C.jpg

Come one, come all for your discount bargain medical advice!
How may I serve you? Or feel free to serve others with your astounding medical knowledge.


(SPOILER)Disclaimer, some of this advice has merit... most of it is from the internet

What is the best way to dispose of a corpse?

It's been in my freezer for a couple days, so take that into account.

oh lord. This is upsetting.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Bunny

What is the best way to dispose of a corpse?

It's been in my freezer for a couple days, so take that into account.

---

Lesson 2:
Be weary of Pig Farmers

I live in a reasonably small apartment in a city that can't quite remove itself from the ways of cattle farming. I do not have access to pigs or any other livestock (short of the aforementioned cow). Are there any other ways to do this? I should also add that my budget is cheap so any sort of equipment sort of the basic living utensils will be difficult to come by.

I also do not own a shovel.

I think this is a trick question to lure out the serial killers.

The bowel thing totally works, by the way.

Last time I made a thread involving poop, it crashed and burned

Clearly you do not know how to talk about poop in an appropriate manner. Take some lessons from the resident poop expert.

Mine involved dating

I see a lot of poop talk, allow me to assist you in understanding your fecal matter more.

Lesson 3:
Know your poop.
http://pics.nerdnirvana.org/d/8234-5...form-scale.jpg

Typically 1-3 is good

No way, 4 is good. You want to see a nice soft "S" or "C" in your toilet bowl.

I totally have my own name for each of those poos. They're all disgusting and horrible in their own way.

:onoes:

NGC says: Girls don't poop

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Vyk

NGC says: Girls don't poop

---

Yeah, pretty much.

This thread took a turn for the worst.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Bunny

What is the best way to dispose of a corpse?

It's been in my freezer for a couple days, so take that into account.I live in a reasonably small apartment in a city that can't quite remove itself from the ways of cattle farming. I do not have access to pigs or any other livestock (short of the aforementioned cow). Are there any other ways to do this? I should also add that my budget is cheap so any sort of equipment sort of the basic living utensils will be difficult to come by.

I also do not own a shovel.

---

*please wear gloves at all times and non descriptive clothing

Since its been in the freezer. the blood has been clotted so it'll be less messy... First off make sure you have some sort of plastic sheets to cover the floors or any other part of the room...Secondly, get your self a meat cleaver.. You'll be doing some heavy hacking, the limbs into smaller pieces...third, make sure lil bits aren't flying around..

Oh and make sure u remove all articles of clothing... And put them in the washer..Do not send it over to the laundry. just clean the clothes as you would with any other..

Now wrap the hacked limbs in to black bags...

When disposing the black bags...Make sure beforehand you know the local traffic timings of cars and pedestrian.. Drive to select stop where you normal do not frequent by and dump the bags in those large garbage bins....

Problem solved...

Make sure you double check everything

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Shorty

I think this is a trick question to lure out the serial killers.

---

I just like watching Dexter , thats all.....

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by ShlupQuack

The bowel thing totally works, by the way.

---

agree

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Vyk

NGC says: Girls don't poop

---

Agree.. With the exception of Shlup...

I'm not Michael C. Hall ffs.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Bunny

I'm not Michael C. Hall ffs.

---

Did I say you were pffft :colbert:

If you don't appreciate suggestions, bugger off then!!But I'd keep one eye open in the night if I were you....