I...
You probably don't want to know about this. Sometime around August of last year I was on an airplane ride to the mystical land of America. It was a trip I had planned and prepared to take for months. I know that some of you don't believe that it really exists but I can swear it does! Unfortunately, I never made it to bring back the proof I was intending to find. With that proof no one would have ever laughed at us believers again! Anyway, after packing my cages for monkeys, nets for giraffes (they're real!), and lollipops for traps everything was ready and I was on my way. It wasn't easy finding a pilot willing to make the trip with me but with enough cocaine and booze the right pilot will fly you anywhere. Then one of the worst things possible happened. Somewhere over the coast of a land spelled with too many letters and not enough vowels we started to crash. I don't remember much of it, but I don't remember much about the flight before the crash so it's nothing any of us should be worried with. I woke up all alone in what turned out to be the Everfree forest. Well, not really alone, but with no plane, pilot, or stuffs I had packed in sight. What was in the forest with me turned out to be a GIANT OCTOPUS MONSTER who liked to eat little boys for lunch! I tried to run away but was halfway in a lake so it wasn't working out so well. Then do you know what happened? Do you think I was saved my five magically-friended ponies? No. I was saved by Derpy pony. Derpy flew in and had a staring contest with the monster. Octipies have a lot of eyes but Derpy happens to be the best at staring contests and sent the gaint back to the bottom of the lake. It turns out she became lost in the forest looking for her lunch so that made two of us with no idea where to go. As we were walking around we heard some singing and walked towards where it was coming from. It was the best, happiest, most random song I have ever heard. As we followed it's sound the song made us really sleepy which caused both of us to fall asleep. I awoke some time later in a little pony house. There was a pink pony and she was so happy I was there she threw me a party. I met all kinds of ponies and Derpy was there too.
Over the next several months Derpy and I became the best of friends but the pink pony, Pinky Pie, and I became closer. We had all kinds of adventures and now I even have my own cutey mark! It's a zombie on my right butt cheek. I'm not sure but I think all is not well though. You see,... well... Pinkie Pie and I made a litter of babies. There's pink centuars(?) running all over Ponyville. I don't know what to do. Send help? :heart:
