Do you feel bad when people give you gifts or offer to help you? I mean for things that aren't your Birthday/Christmas or something.
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Do you feel bad when people give you gifts or offer to help you? I mean for things that aren't your Birthday/Christmas or something.
I like little gifts. Like, at Christmas, when a relative buys me shower gel. Or when my boyfriend buys me earrings.
I like giving little gifts too. Like, hey, I know you like this and it was cheap so I got it!
Bigger gifts can be awkward.
I only feel bad if it is something, like, VERY expensive. Otherwise I am usually grateful.
Sometimes even birthdays and Christmas. I just try to be polite and return the gesture or say thank you.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pike
I really don't mind being given gifts. I appreciate them when it's on a special day, like my birthday, or Christmas. If I was randomly given a gift, I'd be surprise, and sometimes I wouldn't dare accept them. Like this one time at work, I didn't had enough money for a drink, and one of my co-workers offered to pay my drink, something like a gift I guess. I rejected the offer, but she still went through with it anyway. So, I guess I was thankful for the drink. :)
I appreciate the thoughts behind gifts, and I understand that a lot of people enjoy giving them, but I really hate receiving them, including Christmas and birthday gifts. I don't want for a lot and the stuff that I do want is all material trout that doesn't actually matter, and I can get for myself at a later time if I still want it. I hate when people spend money on me alone, even though it has nothing to do with guilt. I just don't like it.
I get embarrassed receiving gifts, especially if more than one person is watching me open them.
Not really, but then, I guess if I did that would mean I feel guilty about anything. That doesn't really happen. I dislike receiving things from others outside of family members on pre-determined gift giving dates, but that's a combination of pride and not wanting to feel like I'm obligated to do something for them someday.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pike
Nah, I like giving and receiving things. But honestly, I more like to give people stuff and watch them get all happy.
Same thing as Megan. I find it much more rewarding to surprise someone with a nice little gift of adoration!
I don't mind little gifts if they can justify it. Like, if they owed me a favor or something. Otherwise, yeah, I'd feel bad that I wasn't as thoughtful. Or something... maybe because I wouldn't think I'm worth the trouble.
I don't even react well to receiving gifts on special occasions. When it's for no reason I have an urge to go on a killing spree.
When I was very broke and needed desperately to see the doctor, my professor offered to pay for the doctor visit. I felt bad for accepting the money, but he insisted. I paid the money back not too long after anyway which he expected.
Pretty much the same.Quote:
Originally Posted by Vivi22Not really, but then, I guess if I did that would mean I feel guilty about anything. That doesn't really happen. I dislike receiving things from others outside of family members on pre-determined gift giving dates, but that's a combination of pride and not wanting to feel like I'm obligated to do something for them someday.Quote:
Originally Posted by Pike
When I was a little girl, every year at Christmas, I used to pick one of my stuffed toys and leave it out for Santa. I figure he gives everyone gifts, he should get something in return. I also used to buy little gifts to give to my friends at my birthday parties.
I feel like when people give me a gift, I should give one in return.
this me also. grammarQuote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
I do that "Oh, you shouldn't have" shtick, but I usually accept it. I think it's rude to reject gifts, and it can be just plain mean. :(
No. I have no issue receiving gifts. I also have no problems giving them out. The way I see it, everybody repays each other eventually, so why bother wasting time with the "oh you shouldn't have gosh" crap when you can just say "thanks, I really appreciate it" and continue having a good life.
this.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
also, I feel bad when people go out of their way to give me a really nice gift and then tell me not to worry about repaying them. It's like an unpaid debt to me and I just feel awful :(
Giving gifts is almost always more fun than receiving gifts. I love seeing people's reactions to the gifts I give.
Here's a quote from the book Tell The Wolves I'm Home that pretty accurately describes how I sometimes feel when I'm on the receiving end of a gift.
"Opening a present from a live person was scary enough. There was always the chance that the gift might be so wrong, so completely not the kind of thing you liked, that you’d realize they didn’t really know you at all."
I usually feel like I'm not deserving of gifts and always feel bad.
I mean I'm immensely grateful but I always have an overwhelming sense of guilt that I'm not worthy of said gifts either. I wonder if that's a knock-on of my "don't rely on anyone but yourself" / "if you want something done do it yourself" upbringing.
I hate buying gifts and I am bad at buying gifts.
I have all sorts of guilt issues relating to Christmas and birthdays where I have received amazing gifts and given awful ones in return and now it's reached complex-level and I am filled with anxiety at the thought of buying gifts and the festive period is now a living hell for me
This this this 1000 times thisQuote:
Originally Posted by Parker
I'm already stressing about Christmas :(
Receiving gifts (from anyone except my parents, who just would rather hand me down older tech than mess around with eBay) then makes me feel that it's polite to reciprocate, and because I'm useless at buying gifts for people it causes me a lot of worry. I'd take it and be thankful of course, no question... the reason for my anxiety is worry that they wouldn't like what I finally manage to find for them, so why would I inflict that on anyone else? But I can't deny that it'd be privately rather stressful.
I never give gifts on impulse, partly because I have a habit of assuming that others are like me and would stress out and feel that they have to get me something back (if I did get someone something randomly, I'd probably end up in the embarrassing situation of TELLING them that they don't have to reciprocate, heh) and partly because I just don't think of it. I have to be in an "I need to find a gift for x" mode to even think about it. (I guess I don't think about others enough :()
I think it could be a sweet thing to do at random, but I'm in that old fashioned minority who would think it's nice to randomly pluck a flower out of the ground and give it to someone or something like that, rather than buying things. I'm not tight with money, but most would probably assume so.
Tip for people who are bad at buying presents: Make something yourself. It would take a magnificent :bou::bou::bou::bou: to trout all over a present that you obviously put effort into making. Even if it is a rubbish present, they still won't act disappointed and you won't feel guilty! Yey!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Quinter Wonderland
Yeah,...crafts are always fun to make....my one brother would probably complain if I gave him one though :roll2
I've always made the cards to give to people too...much better than spending $3+ on a card (I think elderly people especially love things like this too)
Only thing is it gets a bit annoying when a bunch of people buy you chocolate...usually just some fake sugary stuff that's going to murder your system.
I like getting people random little gifts all the time. I got my housemate, who is in love with spiderman, a spiderman advent calendar (which she's already eaten), I've also bought her numerous dinosaur and wild animal sticker books off the market, because she really loves things like that. I got for another friend a signed picture from chris (simpson's artist) which is currently on her wall. They're not the kind of gifts which can be repaid, which are my favourite, I don't give to receive.
I'm grateful when people give me things. If they are poorer than I am in any way I may on occasion feel guilty, but it's entirely down to individual situations. In general, though, yeah, I don't feel guilty.
Why would anyone feel embarrassed about receiving a gift? That being said, I prefer to give rather than receive. OO