I'll be your wingman. Even if it means me taking a chubby, I will suck it up.
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I'll be your wingman. Even if it means me taking a chubby, I will suck it up.
I'm afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run if you will, so I'm afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
Oh, no, no, I'm not in the group yet. I'm afraid I just... blue myself.
Michael if I may take off my pants and pull my analrapist stocking over my head, I think George Michael may be suffering from what we in the soft-sciences call "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder", or the "The O.C. Disorder".
Don't call it that.
I, uh, think I made the fire a little too real, uh, for them
Jessie: There are very few intelligent, attractive and straight men in this town.
Tobias: Well, that certainly leaves me out. [Everyone looks at Tobias] You said "single," right? She said "single."
GOB: You're a good guy, mon frere. That means brother in French. I don't know why I know that, I took four years of Spanish.
Also, everything that Tobias ever says.
ooc: "Arrested Development quotes" more like "Tobias Fünke quotes" amirite (not complaining)
COME ON!
There's always money in the banana stand.
Mrs. Featherbottom: O-kay, who'd like a banger in the mouth?
Mrs. Featherbottom: Right, I forgot, here in the States, you call it a *sausage* in the mouth.
Michael: We just call it a sausage.
I was debating putting this, just because it is single-handedly to me, the funniest scene from Arrested Development.Quote:
Originally Posted by The Man
We shan't be telling your mother, shan't we?
I think I might have to agree, although there are a lot of contenders for that mantle.
Jessie: Your father's religious now? We'll play that up. It's very sympathetic.
Lucille: Yeah. Who doesn't love the Jews?
Michael: I burned it. Down to the ground.
George Sr.: There was money in that banana stand.
Michael: Well, it's all gone now.
George Sr.: There was $250,000 lining the inside walls of the banana stand.
Michael: What?
George Sr.: Cash, Michael. What the hell did you think I meant when I said (strangling Michael) THERE IS MONEY... IN... THE BANANA STAND!
Michael: There's more to life than strippers and booze and buckets of blood...Why do you guys have buckets of blood?
Gob: It's not real blood. It's corn syrup and red dye... juice.
Buster: There's unlimited juice? This party is gonna be off the hook.
Everyone's laughing and riding and cornholing except Buster.
I have an image for thathttp://25.media.tumblr.com/450bd5b63...tsyo1_1280.jpg. It's funnier if you're a GoT fan, though.Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm my own MILF
STEVE HOLT!
Michael: Are those pills?
Steve Holt: I got them from Coach. They're filled with oxygen and it makes you incontinent. It's called "Oxy Incontin"
Gob: The zero hour, Michael. It's the end of the line. I'm the firstborn. Sick of playing second fiddle. Always third in line for everything. Tired of finishing fourth. Being the fifth wheel. [thinks for a moment] There are six things I'm mad about, and I'm taking over.
George Michael Bluth: Say what you want about America, thirteen bucks still gets you a hell of a lot of mice!
NO TOUCHING
they don't allow you to have bees in here
Tobias went to a tryout for the Blue Man Group hoping to be seen. Unfortunately, it was dusk, and he wasn't seen.
Attachment 38505
Excuse me, do these effectively hide my thunder?
Gob: Hey, guy. They tell me you're the actor who plays Marta's brother, Tio.
Spanish actor: Como?
Gob: Oh, you're gonna be in a coma, all right.
And secondly, I know you're the big marriage expert. Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot. Your wife is dead.
It's a shemale.
These are lawyers. That's Latin for liar.
Gob: Believe me, we didn't do any sleeping. I had sex last night.
Narrator: But he really didn't
Gob: Yes, I did.
Well, they expect a certain amount of theft, Michael. It's built into the price. If I didn't take it, then people would be overpaying for nothing.
Gob: Brother? Hermano means brother? Well, sounds like Hermano is about to get his ass kicked.
Bob Loblaw - English - YouTube
Best name in any tv show ever.
Bob Loblaw Law Blog
Dave Attell: Whoa, this guy's straight?
Dave Attell: Then, what am I wearing these for?
Her?
Gob: Franklin said some things Whitey wasn't ready to hear.
Michael: Gob, weren't you also mercilessly beaten outside of a club in Torrance for that act?
Gob: He also said some things that African-American-y wasn't ready to hear either.
It's the carpenter who blames his shoddy... [touches cornballer] [bleep] stupid corballin' piece of [bleep]!
Narrator: After being arrested, George Sr. found a loophole in the Mexican judicial system...
George Sr.: I have...
[clears throat]
George Sr.: ... I have money!
Gob: I [bleep]ed Kitty!
Michael: Gob! I just wanted you to get the information.
Gob: I got the information.
Michael: You did, huh? About the international accounts?
Gob: Oh, I see what you're getting at. No, I didn't get any information.
Bob Loblaw Lobs Law Bomb!Quote:
Originally Posted by The Man
I've made a huge mistake.
Tobias: "Come on, don't leave you're uncle T-bag hanging."
George Michael: "Please stop calling yourself that."
Tobias: "I can't wait to get those meaty, leading man parts in my mouth."
G.O.B.: "So you came back here to hide like a child."
Michael: "What are you doing locked in my office, exactly?"
G.O.B.: "Hiding from a child. Big difference."
No sugar for you. You just get more awful.
Michael: G.O.B., instead of always coming to me looking for money, saying, "I've made a huge mistake," you can bail yourself out next time.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
Gob: I've never admitted to a mistake. What would I have made a mistake about?
I'd buy it.
I've made a huge tiny mistake.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
Reno: Make the biggest little mistake of your life.
What's spanish for "I know you know english"?
I don't criticize you! And if you're worried about criticism, sometimes a diet is the best defense.
It was shoplifting and I'm white. I think I'm gonna be okay.
No, mother. I can blow myself.
Yes, I have a rape horn, Michael, because you took away my mace.
Buster: I’m a scholar. I enjoy scholarly pursuits.
Lucille: Suddenly, playing with yourself is a scholarly pursuit.
Narrator: For the first time, Lucille prays...
Lucille: [Praying] Take something else from us. Do whatever you have to to keep my boy from going to war.
Narrator: And Buster is on his way when he decides to pursue a long-delayed rite of passage...
[Buster swims in the ocean]
Person: Loose seal. Watch out for loose seal.
Buster: [Thinking he means Lucille] I don't care about Lucille. She lies.
Narrator: ...and then a seal bites off his hand.
I don't care for Gob.
George Senior: Gilligan has promised me that all this money will be safe in IRAs.
Ira Gilligan: It's Ira, sir.
George Senior: Oh, I'm sorry, Gilligan. Will be safe in Iras.
Michael: Hello.
Gob: It’s Gob I’m looking for Jessie.
Michael: She just left, Gob What’s wrong?
Gob: I need her to spin something for me.
Michael: Well, that’s too bad, because I think she quit. What do you need her to spin?
Gob: ...Murder.
Maeby: Is there any way I can divorce them?
Barry: Oh, sure. It’s called emancipation. But you’ve got to prove that you’re living in an unstable environment.
Maeby: Both my parents are trying to have affairs. Of course, they haven’t succeeded yet.
Lucille Bluth: Michael fired you?
Gob: No, I fired him. As a result, I'm no longer welcome in the office.
Not tricks, Michael; illusions. A trick is something a whore does for money. [GOB notices children in earshot] ...Or cocaine!
Lucille Bluth: Get me a vodka rocks.
Michael: Mom, it’s breakfast.
Lucille Bluth: And a piece of toast.
Lindsay: You’ve had $80,000 worth of cartography lessons. Get us a channel to the ocean.
Buster: Okay, okay, okay... Obviously this blue part here is the land.
The show's return has been confirmed for May.
Michael (to Gob): Get rid of the Seaward.
Lucille Bluth: I’ll leave when I’m good and ready.
Michael: Maybe you can take a date up there!
Lucille: How am I supposed to find someone willing to go into that musty old claptrap?
(incredibly long awkward pause)
Michael: (suddenly) The cabin! Yes. That will be difficult, too.
Are the Cookie Monster and Buster Bluth supposed to have the same pose right there?
:monster:
I'M A COOOOOOKIIIIIEEEEE MOOOOONNNNNSTEEERRRRRRRR!
Why should you go to jail for a crime that someone else... noticed?
You don't need double-talk; you need Bob Loblaw.
Bob Loblaw no habla español.
G.O.B.: Gobias. As in, “Go buy us some coffee.”
And the inevitable followup:
I love that I notice something different each time I watch through this show. This time I discovered the running gag of ice cream sandwiches being mentioned or shown every time they're in the prison. Sometimes it's simply the camera panning over a vending machine full of them, or some random guard eating one. What a brilliant show.
Guard 1: HE'S GOT BEES!
Guard 2: NO BEES!
Lucille: They don't allow you to have bees in here.
"That's like the seventh nipple I've seen today."
Take it back! If I wanted something your thumb touched, I'd eat the inside of your ear!
