The Sausage Roll UBERTHREAD 2k14

ok guys its that time of year where we think and talk about sausage rolls.


sausage rolls are tubes of sausage meat encased in pastry and are a particularly british thing to eat (I think). they are a working-man's lunch staple. the middle classes adore them in a picnic with other finger foods cut into manageable sizes, sitting on blankets in the spring time. the upper classes don't know what they are, and fear them. that's why they live in big houses with high walls, to block out the sausage.

today, just now in fact, i had to go to the store to pick up some essentials. the guy gave me two (2) free sausage rolls!!!!

they have been under a heat lamp in the store next to the cigarettes for probably 18 hours or more. they're disgusting but satisfying. the paper bag he put them in was translucent with grease in the 4 minutes or so it took me to take them home. wonderful stuff. disgusting and awful but somehow wonderful. i am filled with joy right now.

This is the Sausage Roll Uberthread for 2014. Do you like sausage rolls? Do you hate sausage rolls? What are your favourite brands? Have you ever made your own?


SAUSAGE ROLL CHAT ONLY. NO HATERS.

That sounds so Southern redneck trailer park it's ridiculous.

I'm good on that one. :D

The only bakery good I like more than a meat pie is a sausage roll. I dont like it when they come in a plastic wrapper thing. Those tend to have a bad sausage to pastry ratio.

The true question is not "Do you like sausage rolls?" it is "Do you like sausage rolls hot or cold?" to which the answer is of course both.

Sausage rolls are better heated than cold but hell yeah Sausage Rolls are a meaty lunchtime heaven!

i remember they'd microwave the ones in schoolif you asked from them hot. a limp soggy delicious treat

I like them better hot, not a fan of how the grease goes all congealed and ick.

I've never had them but they sound yummy.

The food van that used to come to my old workplace at break time had the best sausage rolls ever. Nice flaky pastry, greasy filth soft sausage meat served hot. God damn I would kill for one right now. You better believe I got one every day.

That being said I love 'em any which way. Asda pack of 6 for £1 sheer filth rolls, straight out the fridge, at least 3 in one sitting otherwise you're left with nothing but a sense of depression.

Give it a dip in some ketchup and those sheer filth rolls would be just fine right about now. In fact this talk of sausage rolls makes me want some!

It's a shame 90% of store-bought sausage rolls are pretty bad. They're still great, but bad.

smurf ginsters forever

I was once in Carlisle for a day and I went into Greggs to buy a sausage roll before my journey home... they didn't have a smurfing clue what a sausage roll was. The north is a smurfed up place.

wtf. you'd think carlisle would be all over the sausage roll. messed up priotirites imo

Wow. That must be a depressing place to live. :(

Can't beat a big, hot sausage roll. Especially one that's been spruced up with cheese and chilli.

And for the vegetarians, there's the option of spinach and ricotta filling. I'm not vegetarian, but I still go for this type of roll now and then.

Y'all are gross.

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Originally Posted by Kalevala

Y'all are gross.

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Are you saying... you don't like sausage rolls?

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Originally Posted by Shauna

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Originally Posted by Kalevala

Y'all are gross.

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Are you saying... you don't like sausage rolls?

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I knew we reversed his name change from April Fool's too soon.

Hey now, being a sausage hater and a cat lover are two different... things... oh. :|

I love a good sausage roll.

Don't be mad but I'm not a huge fan of Gregg's sausage roll! I'm not saying I wouldn't eat one (I would) but give me a homemade, hot, non-greasy non-gritty, good quality sausage, sausage roll any day.

what is wrong with you

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Originally Posted by Rantz

I've never had them but they sound yummy.

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Me neither. As a matter of fact I can't recall the last time I had sausage in general.

What have we done to deserve such cruel and unusual punishment? To be denied the sweet, sweet taste of sausage rolls? Why, God, why!? TELL ME WHY?!

Born outside the motherland?

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Originally Posted by Iceglow

Born outside the motherland?

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Yes T_T

Sucks to be born in the USA doesn't it? :P

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Originally Posted by Iceglow

Sucks to be born in the USA doesn't it? :P

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Kinda sorta.

Sausage rolls are great. Gotta be up there with the true blue aussie foods.

I do not approve of the poncery mentioned in this thread. Cheese? Chilli? All fine in their own rights, but they belong nowhere near a Sausage roll. Pastry, Sausage, done. :colbert:

Pastry, questionable meat product, done.

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Originally Posted by DK

I do not approve of the poncery mentioned in this thread. Cheese? Chilli? All fine in their own rights, but they belong nowhere near a Sausage roll. Pastry, Sausage, done. :colbert:

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Indeed. What has the world come to when we cannot enjoy the humble sausage roll for what it is?

The closest things I've had to a sausage roll are pigs in a blanket and monkey bread.

i dont want to change the topic too much (this is the sausage roll uberthread after all) but sausage wrapped in bacon is smurfing divine

None of these smurfing fancy bloody sausages either. As Shauna put it we only want the most questionable pure filth sausage there is!

Still I'm hoping Paul and Parks enjoyed the picture of that sweating pair of pastry wrapped filth love parcels I snapped to them the other day!

i did not receive this

Well there goes the biggest appreciator of questionable meaty goods I know of.

i received it!

i was jealous

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Originally Posted by Parker

i dont want to change the topic too much (this is the sausage roll uberthread after all) but sausage wrapped in bacon is smurfing divine

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:up:

Sugar on sausages?

that does sound good actually i guess idk i would have to try it lets try it psy

Yeah I'm curious. About many things, as it happens, but right now mostly about this sugar sausages business.

im gonna try this for easter and if it goes badly ur dead

yes, among other things ;)

Hahaha Jinx, post the recipe here. I might just have to make the most unholy of holy trinities...

Sausage roll using caramelized pigs in blankets!