Sugar, spice and everything nice. CHEMICAL X WHAT NO NO NO

People of EoFF, my brethren, the topic of discussion I put to you now is how was your birth?

Was it an easy, fun experience? Do you remember it at all? I doubt you do. Don't sass me. People rarely remember these things! :greenie:

I was born not breathing, all blue and horrible because I'd eaten my own poo and also got choked by my own chord! It wasn't looking good for Alive-Man. Oh no. :nonono:

But I was saved. And everything was okay.

Here you go EoFF I found you a really nice song about being born into this strange world, I hope you enjoy it. You can listen to it while you are posting your replies to me about how you were born. I don't know anything about this song, but it's sweet and beautiful it says in the comments, and that's exactly what all of you are.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SxNLoyu5KQ


I am so glad all of you were born love from Alive-Man xxxxxxxxxxx

I don't know. I think most of the problems with me came after bringing me home. Asthma was a real bitch the first couple of years.

BELIEVE IT OR NOT I WAS BORN NATURALLY...
I mean yeah, I wasn't summoned by someone opening the Seven Gates of Hell or anything... Ha ;D

My birth went relatively normal, as far as I know. After I emerged, my mom demanded a frozen chocolate banana for her efforts.

My dear mother likes to tell me about all the stitches she had to get because I was a big ol' baby.

:stare:

Thanks Mum.

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Originally Posted by Shauna

My dear mother likes to tell me about all the stitches she had to get because I was a big ol' baby.

:stare:

Thanks Mum.

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I did not know this was a thing until my sister gave birth for the first time and told me about it. I almost lost my breakfast.

As I said before, I never forget anything! ;)

It was a glorious experience. I conquered the escape from that vagina like no other before or since! I was victorious at 4:22 am on the 14th morning of September in the 85th year of the 20th century!

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Originally Posted by Shorty

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Originally Posted by Shauna

My dear mother likes to tell me about all the stitches she had to get because I was a big ol' baby.

:stare:

Thanks Mum.

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I did not know this was a thing until my sister gave birth for the first time and told me about it. I almost lost my breakfast.

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I am sorry for reminding you of this sort of thing. xD I, however, am reminded of this on a semi-frequent basis, so I suppose I get to spread the pain.

my mum was in labour and my dad was like "idk to help with the pain you should bite my nose" trying to make her laugh and relieve stress so she did and he got hurt

basically my dad is a smurfin idiot

Born of natural birth. Was very sick and came close to death, doctors weren't sure what was wrong so I stayed in the hospital for an extra three weeks.

But everything went well and now I am here making pronunciation videos and such.

I was born 4 lbs, my mom was only in labor for a few hours. That's basically all I know about it

My son was born naturally, no epidural or anything, so I GOT TO EAT FOOD AND DRINK JUICE and it was a house birth so I also got to watch Desperate Housewives and they told me I could take a shower but gravity was my enemy so I said no to that one.

Attachment 56666

I was born normal size, but with yellow jaundice. I had to be hospitalized for a few days extra before I was able to go home.

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Originally Posted by Jinx

My mom had to have a C-section because my head was too big.

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Not even joking, that's what happened to me. Also, my umbilical cord was choking me. Also, there was 19 hours of labor beforehand. Also, I was born a month late.

Did your parents not give you "the talk" alive man?

I don't know the story of my birth. Never cared to ask. I just assume I always was in existence.

Alive-Man: I'm glad you made it through your birth alive, man.

My birth was relatively easy, apparently. My mum woke up early in the morning, read a book for a few hours and only bothered waking Dad once the contractions were closer together. Drove to the hospital and had me a couple of hours later. And that is the one and only time I haven't been a massive inconvenience! :jess:

I came out screaming "DYNAMIC ENTRY!" and crescent kicked the doctor in the jaw.

Apparently I took something like 11 hours. There was a slight debate over my time of birth because it was right in the middle of daylight savings changing.

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Originally Posted by Loony BoB

Apparently I took something like 11 hours. There was a slight debate over my time of birth because it was right in the middle of daylight savings changing.

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So in a way, you may not even exist? Please don't go anywhere. We need you.

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Originally Posted by AlaynaMae

Alive-Man: I'm glad you made it through your birth alive, man.

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So am I. I am so glad we are all here to enjoy each other on EoFF. Hearing all of your stories makes me realise how precious we all are and lucky to have one and other.

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Originally Posted by Mr. Shauna

Did your parents not give you "the talk" alive man?

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No :(

I was born blue in the face, being choked by the umbilical cord. Other than that, I imagine that I caused my mum hell for however long her labour lasted. I've never really asked for any of the gruesome details. xD

I didn't want to go. It was so nice and warm in there and everything was cozy with safeness. Then they cut a hole in my mom and made me come out anyway. I'll never forgive them. Tt was even two weeks early.

>>> All I know is that I was not born into a rich family :eep::eep::eep::eep::eep::mad::mad::mad::mad2::argh:..:luca:

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Originally Posted by black orb

>>> All I know is that I was not born into a rich family :eep::eep::eep::eep::eep::mad::mad::mad::mad2::argh:..:luca:

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This is about all I know also! There is also fact that I was unreasonably and dangerously small.

Also incidentally I looked very Asian, so there was some suspicion that I was even her child even though I did in fact just come out of mother's womb.

Nope. Not good at all.


I had the umbilical cord around my neck and almost chocked me to death.


I was born purple- from the choking and lack of air.

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Originally Posted by Jess

I was born blue in the face, being choked by the umbilical cord.

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woot

almost died from the umbilical cord buddies ????

I was 7 lbs I think. And quite possibly my mom didn't get an epidural. I can't remember if she told me that or not. It was a big deal though. My dad had been gone in the truck and when he finally got to where he was unloading, a dispatcher told him he needed to call home immediately.. He dead headed (meaning driving without a trailer) back to home, missing 2 sets of scales that were open, Then jumped in their car to get to the hospital and the engine caught fire on the way there. Yep.

My little girl's birth was rough. They'd given me ambient the night before, then induced me early the next morning... Then they gimme Demerol like twice cuz I was in so much pain.. They gave me a lol bit more right before giving me the epidural.. And then wound up refilling the epidural bag. I still felt everything. It was Hell. And the doctor didn't bother snipping my va-jay-jay, she just let it rip on its own. Annnnnnd I didn't find out until a few days after that the umbilical cord was wrapped around my daughter's neck twice. Lol I was begging the Dr to use the vacuum and get it over with by the end though. .... Oh. And I was on oxygen most of the time. And my sister asked for a tent. Like they do with c-sections haha.

But! Out of 17 total women, I was the only mother to have given birth normally. Without needing a c-section. The nurses were all so proud of me.

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Originally Posted by noxious.sunshine

The nurses were all so proud of me.

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Not as proud as I am! You birthed great and damn good by the sounds of it :greenie:

I was born with a heart that was backwards and had a hole in it. It also promptly grew to the size of a full grown man's heart because it was working overtime to overcome the leak and feed blood to my body. I was saved by poison (literally - foxglove stops your heart, so they gave me just enough to slow it down) and some other potent chemicals and then a blood clot stopped up the hole.

To this day all the tubing and wiring in my heart is backwards, though.

edit: also my mom is SUPER blonde and I was born with a headful of super dark hair so everywhere we went people thought that I was adopted from Korea or something

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Originally Posted by Pike

I was born with a heart that was backwards and had a hole in it. It also promptly grew to the size of a full grown man's heart because it was working overtime to overcome the leak and feed blood to my body. I was saved by poison (literally - foxglove stops your heart, so they gave me just enough to slow it down) and some other potent chemicals and then a blood clot stopped up the hole.

To this day all the tubing and wiring in my heart is backwards, though.

edit: also my mom is SUPER blonde and I was born with a headful of super dark hair so everywhere we went people thought that I was adopted from Korea or something

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That is crazy, I'm very glad they were able to sort that stuff out! Doctors do smart things.

Obviously I don't remember a thing about it. I'm not even sure I had a memory before age 2. I've heard from my parents that I was born very early in the morning and it was a 2-day labor formy mother. Not anything bad I don't think, but I was her first kid so it was all new to her. I was a smaller baby out of all 3 of my siblings. That's really all I know. 1986 was a long time ago lol

Oh yeah, my mum's labour started during an airing of a Star Trek episode that my mum was aparently really annoyed that she had to miss to birth me.

I wish I knew what episode. It could be the key to understanding my entire life

From what I'm told I was two weeks late and didn't cry when I came out.

I then spent the next five years crying as loud as I could and causing my parents a great deal of regret.

Pike has the best birth ever :( so jelloas :(((

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Originally Posted by Kanye West

Pike has the best birth ever :( so jelloas :(((

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Did you post your birth, Parky? If not, post it. If so, post it again in much more detail :greenie:

i was premature


mamma parker was doing x-games and like she aired off the vert and did a pretty sick kickflip but like when she kicked out i popped like 2 weeks early it was p gross they dont let us in at x-games anymore

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Originally Posted by Kanye West

i was premature


mamma parker was doing x-games and like she aired off the vert and did a pretty sick kickflip but like when she kicked out i popped like 2 weeks early it was p gross they dont let us in at x-games anymore

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Rightly so. I'm glad though, because now we have Porker :love: