Shauna and Jinx Watch Terrible Movies and Talk About Them

Did you know that Shauna and I are BFFs? Probably. Did you know that Shauna and I love to get drunk and watch horrible movies together over Skype? Probably not. We decided to start reviewing all of the terribad movies we watch for your reading pleasure, EoFF!

So far Shauna and Jinx have watched:

• Mommie Dearest
• Fifty Shades of Grey
• The Room

Jinx's Movie Rating (from worst to least worst):

1. Fifty Shades of Grey
2. Spice World
3. Showgirls
4. Mommie Dearest
5. The Room

Shauna's Movie Rating (from worst to least worst):

1. Fifty Shades of Grey
2. Showgirls
3. Spice World
4. Mommie Dearest
5. The Room

Next up: TBD!

http://users.content.ytmnd.com/7/9/7...cce14ee26b.jpg

Making a request. Watch Troll 2.

I think that is on ~the list~

Oh man, I didn't even think about opening up the thread for requests! People should totally do that! :jess:

Jeez what are you movie critics? You should make a site dedicated to such activities. It'd probably get much activity considering movie goers tend to check the critics rating before they actually watch the movies. Strange thing these days.

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Originally Posted by Lazerface

Jeez what are you movie critics? You should make a site dedicated to such activities. It'd probably get much activity considering movie goers tend to check the critics rating before they actually watch the movies.

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Rude. If you don't want to read the thread, don't read it. We're not really trying to get e-famous. We're just doing it to have fun.

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Originally Posted by Lazerface

Strange thing these days.

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http://home.eyesonff.com/attachment....id=65274&stc=1

I recommend Slumber Party Massacre.

I heard Birdemic is pretty bad.

Twilight obv. The 1992 Buffy movie was pretty bad, too.

And every single Uwe Boll movie.

Here's some brief thoughts on this evening's film.

Showgirls:

Sex doesn't work like that.

I just saw more tits and vag than I ever wanted to see. I'm bisexual. This movie grossed me out.

I hope I remember enough of this nightmare when I'm sober. Or maybe. Maybe I actually hope I remember none of it.

I just remembered another bad movie called "The Sisterhood: Pledge of Evil." The sex in that is so awkward I can't even.

It's a favorite past time of mine to watch terrible movies with friends. We call it b movie night. The worse so far has been this film:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077904/...nm_flmg_act_51

The ending was the weirdest trout I've seen on film yet.

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Originally Posted by Shiny

It's a favorite past time of mine to watch terrible movies with friends. We call it b movie night. The worse so far has been this film:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077904/...nm_flmg_act_51

The ending was the weirdest trout I've seen on film yet.

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That description has me cracking up. Thank you for the suggestion. :lol:

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Originally Posted by Jinx

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Originally Posted by Shiny

It's a favorite past time of mine to watch terrible movies with friends. We call it b movie night. The worse so far has been this film:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0077904/...nm_flmg_act_51

The ending was the weirdest trout I've seen on film yet.

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That description has me cracking up. Thank you for the suggestion. :lol:

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It is as ridiculous as it sounds.

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Originally Posted by Jinx

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Originally Posted by Lazerface

Jeez what are you movie critics? You should make a site dedicated to such activities. It'd probably get much activity considering movie goers tend to check the critics rating before they actually watch the movies.

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Rude. If you don't want to read the thread, don't read it. We're not really trying to get e-famous. We're just doing it to have fun.

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Originally Posted by Lazerface

Strange thing these days.

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http://home.eyesonff.com/attachment....id=65274&stc=1

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I wasn't trying to be rude

Do you guys see yourselves more like Siskel & Ebert or Statler & Waldorf?

Longer commentary from me:

Surprisingly, Showgirls was terrible. I know, right? But you know, the worst thing a piece of "entertainment" can do is be boring. And as much as I disliked everything about this movie, and thought the entire cast of characters was stupid, and was horrified any time anyone so much as moved or opened their mouths... I had fun. It made me laugh at multiple points with its ridiculousness, and when it wasn't be ridiculous in a funny way it just left me pretty gobsmacked at what it was actually doing. It was a two hour long train wreck, but I never checked how long we had left to watch out of boredom - it was in a "We're 33 minutes in and we've already had a horrifying stripper dance and the most terrifying sex I've ever seen" kind of way. Also "We're 20 minutes from the end, where is the plot and how are they going to resolve it?"

And this is really the sticking point for me, why I'd consider this a "less bad" movie than 50 Shades. I remember watching 50 Shades and was constantly checking how long we'd been watching it, how long was left, and dammit why couldn't the movie just be over already. Although you could (loosely) say that it had a better put together plot and character arcs compared to Showgirls... It was also incredibly boring. I felt nothing for 50 Shades. It evoked no emotion or reaction from me. Showgirls at least had something, it gave me something to be entertained by, although I do wish I could get back the hours of my life spent watching both of these awful movies.

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Originally Posted by Shauna

Longer commentary from me:

Surprisingly, Showgirls was terrible. I know, right? But you know, the worst thing a piece of "entertainment" can do is be boring. And as much as I disliked everything about this movie, and thought the entire cast of characters was stupid, and was horrified any time anyone so much as moved or opened their mouths... I had fun. It made me laugh at multiple points with its ridiculousness, and when it wasn't be ridiculous in a funny way it just left me pretty gobsmacked at what it was actually doing. It was a two hour long train wreck, but I never checked how long we had left to watch out of boredom - it was in a "We're 33 minutes in and we've already had a horrifying stripper dance and the most terrifying sex I've ever seen" kind of way. Also "We're 20 minutes from the end, where is the plot and how are they going to resolve it?"

And this is really the sticking point for me, why I'd consider this a "less bad" movie than 50 Shades. I remember watching 50 Shades and was constantly checking how long we'd been watching it, how long was left, and dammit why couldn't the movie just be over already. Although you could (loosely) say that it had a better put together plot and character arcs compared to Showgirls... It was also incredibly boring. I felt nothing for 50 Shades. It evoked no emotion or reaction from me. Showgirls at least had something, it gave me something to be entertained by, although I do wish I could get back the hours of my life spent watching both of these awful movies.

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So Bad It's Good

Yes I know the trope exists, and I am fairly certain this won't be the only movie brought up in this thread that falls under that bracket. Heck, there's a reason why The Room is least worst, when it is probably worse than the rest of them in many ways. :p

But where's the fun in saying "It's so bad it's good" for every single entry. I'mma just use my poorly sentenced words to articulate my thoughts on the movies.

And you did a good job, Shauna ;)

Maybe after all this is over, you could seperate those into two lists? Like, one with those that are so bad they're hilarious and then one with those that are just so bad they're bad, like 50 Shades. As that the impression I'm getting so far, that the Room and Showgirls were great fun to watch, while 50 Shades was just boring.

Yeah, I didn't really like 50 Shades of Grey. The character of Christian Grey is horrible (though I quite like Jamie Dornan) and I couldn't stand the woman playing Anna... nor could I stand her character either. Won't be putting myself through it again. MissH liked it though.

I don't think I could ever expose myself to Showgirls. I have the seen the sex scene in the pool and it is both hilarious and horrifying in equal measure.

If you can find it, you should totally watch The Roller Blade Seven.

The whole reason we watch bad movies together is to have fun because they're so bad they're good. That's kind of the idea. :roll2

Then you should definitely watch The Roller Blade Seven. Have drinks whilst watching it... a lot of drinks. It will be fantastic.

-looks up pool scene-

Is she having a seizure? Don't just sit there, help her!

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Originally Posted by Bubba

Then you should definitely watch The Roller Blade Seven. Have drinks whilst watching it... a lot of drinks. It will be fantastic.

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All of our movie nights have copious amounts of alcohol. :lol:

I think it was Rantasmo from Needs More Gay that had the best reaction to that scene.

"Is this what straight sex looks like?! :onoes:"

I'd suggest Battlefield Earth. A movie so terrible, that moogles quiver at the thought of the film being used as a torture method. Either that or Rebecca Black's Friday. But Battlefield Earth? Watch it and you'll be laughing so damn hard.

Are you still doing this? Because if so, please watch Surf Nazis Must Die

Oh gosh it was something

SHARKNADO!

With special guest: Sharky.

We will watch another one soon!

Double Dragon.

Spice World

I didn't think there was a movie out there that could be worse than 50 Shades. And well, so far, I haven't seen one that is! But this one comes reeeeally close. REALLY close. Because--just as 50 Shades did--it commits the worst sin a movie can commit: it's boring. Adding onto that, it's over the top and stupid. I was counting down the minutes until it was over.

Unlike most females my age, I never saw this movie until now. I've always loved the Spice Girls, but for whatever reason, I never saw this movie. I'm sure if I had seen it as a kid, I would've loved it, and it'd hold a special place in my heart. As it is now, I just hate it.

There were some top quality actors and actresses in this movie too. Richard E. Grant, Jennifer Saunders, and Stephen Fry all made appearances. There's a meta moment during the credits where Richard E. Grant (as himself) is meant to be talking to his agent and says he's wary of taking the role because he doesn't want to kill his career.

And, ultimately, that's what saves this movie from being worse than 50 Shades for me: it's meta. It realizes it's a smurfing awful movie and plays with it. Unlike 50 Shades of Grey--which legitimately tired to be a good film--it's horrible and stupid and camp and it recognizes that. The scene during the credit roll is enough to confirm that everyone was just being stupid for the paycheck.

Also this movie is horribly racist. Scary Spice (who is the only? [not sure what Posh's ethnicity is] black member) of course wears a dashiki, and decorates her room with African masks, and puts her in really stereotypical black roles. Also, there's an Italian character who a-talk-a like-a dees and has a unibrow. I'm sure I'm missing lots of examples, too.

At least the soundtrack was fun.

I watched this movie as a kid and it definitely does not hold a special place in my heart. It is terrible, and there's no other way to look at it. I do disagree that it was boring, but then I enjoy dumb-fun things a fair bit, so there we go.

As it all goes, I would really rather never watch this movie again, but if I was forced to, I'd watch this again over both 50 Shades and Showgirls, because dayum.

Showgirls was way better than this. At least there were boobs.

I had more fun watching this than I did watching Showgirls. :3 But, I think we will just have to agree to disagree on that point.

No, you're objectively wrong. /Hux

Nah.

Anyway, what is NEXT

something bad

Future War

Spice World is awesome. It was deliberately bad because it's a comedy. 10/10

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Originally Posted by Jinx

I didn't think there was a movie out there that could be worse than 50 Shades. And well, so far, I haven't seen one that is! But this one comes reeeeally close. REALLY close.

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You might say that when it comes to worst films... 50 Shades of Grey just shaded it.

USER WAS BANNED FOR IMPERSONATING SEPHEX IN THIS POST

Shiny gets it!

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Showgirls was way better than this. At least there were boobs.

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how smurfing dare you showgirls is actually worse than twilight, I would rather watch bella swan try to throw herself off of a motorcycle than watch showgirls ever again

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Originally Posted by Shorty

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Showgirls was way better than this. At least there were boobs.

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how smurfing dare you showgirls is actually worse than twilight, I would rather watch bella swan try to throw herself off of a motorcycle than watch showgirls ever again

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"Man, everybody sparkles and s***!"

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Originally Posted by Shauna

agree to disagree

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Disagree to agree.

Watch this one. Neither of you will last three minutes.

Showgirls I couldn't even finish. I finished Twilight. It was bad but not that bad. Had a good soundtrack at least :monster:

Recently a bad movie I tried watching was Zombie Beavers...yeah.

Never watched Showgirls, but I sat through the first Twilight movie once out of curiosity. Actually wasn't that bad, got some genuine laughs from me. When Edward isn't being a creeper he's an all right guy. From what I understand the movies improve upon the books. At least as much as they can.

Did I just praise Twilight? I have dishonored myself and my family. -impales self with sword-

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Originally Posted by Ayen

Never watched Showgirls, but I sat through the first Twilight movie once out of curiosity. Actually wasn't that bad, got some genuine laughs from me. When Edward isn't being a creeper he's an all right guy. From what I understand the movies improve upon the books. At least as much as they can.

Did I just praise Twilight? I have dishonored myself and my family. -impales self with sword-

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Edward is never not being a creeper though...

Ya'll just going to gloss over that movie I posted?

Anyway, just wanted to chime in on the Twilight thing. Friend and I watched the first two for laughs. I been wanting to watch the rest of the movies because they were fun to riff on with a few buddies, but at the same time they are just mostly guilty of being simply boring movies. Though, I keep hearing that the end battle in the last movie is HYSTERICAL (even though it ends up being a lame cop out vision or whatever).

But yeah, the story is obviously aimed at tween girls, but also has creepy aspects the story. I feel sorry for Bella's father. Screw Team Edward of Team Jacob. Team Mike all the way! That poor dude puts up with so much garbage!

Relativey speaking, the books are way better than the movies. And the books aren't even as bad as most people make out. Sure, they're not GOOD, but they're not end of the world bad or anything. People act like it'd the worst series of all time when it really isn't. And they might not be good, but at least they're entertaining. I still hold my position that the worst thing media can do isn't be bad, or stupid, or offensive. The worst thing it can do is be boring.

Also, Sephex: Charlie's Bella's dad. And actually my favorite character in the series!

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Relativey speaking, the books are way better than the movies. And the books aren't even as bad as most people make out. Sure, they're not GOOD, but they're not end of the world bad or anything. People act like it'd the worst series of all time when it really isn't. And they might not be good, but at least they're entertaining. I still hold my position that the worst thing media can do isn't be bad, or stupid, or offensive. The worst thing it can do is be boring.

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You're right in a sense; the worst thing for media is for it to be boring because boring media gets forgotten. Bad, stupid, and offensive things are remembered. The fact that the series romanticises the abuse and neglect of women, supports stalking is an acceptable form of flattery, that loss of identity when not clinging to a man they worship is normal, portrays women are sinners who beg for sex and overall supports the idea that defining oneself purely by their relationship is what we should strive for in life, among a myriad of other poor lessons to teach to women - especially young and impressionable women - makes it bad, stupid, and offensive.

It's just been eclipsed (lolol) by the Master of the Universe series, which shocked everyone into being actually worse than Twilight.

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Originally Posted by Shorty

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Relativey speaking, the books are way better than the movies. And the books aren't even as bad as most people make out. Sure, they're not GOOD, but they're not end of the world bad or anything. People act like it'd the worst series of all time when it really isn't. And they might not be good, but at least they're entertaining. I still hold my position that the worst thing media can do isn't be bad, or stupid, or offensive. The worst thing it can do is be boring.

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You're right in a sense; the worst thing for media is for it to be boring because boring media gets forgotten. Bad, stupid, and offensive things are remembered. The fact that the series romanticises the abuse and neglect of women, supports stalking is an acceptable form of flattery, that loss of identity when not clinging to a man they worship is normal, portrays women are sinners who beg for sex and overall supports the idea that defining oneself purely by their relationship is what we should strive for in life, among a myriad of other poor lessons to teach to women - especially young and impressionable women - makes it bad, stupid, and offensive.

It's just been eclipsed (lolol) by the Master of the Universe series, which shocked everyone into being actually worse than Twilight.

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Actually had to Google and make sure that was Fifty Shades. x)

You're not wrong, but I still think it's far from the worst series or worst books ever written. Especially from a technical stand point (people say the writing is awful, when it's not so bad. Again, not good, but better than some stuff I've read, for sure!)

At least the Midnight Sun (lololol) of the series has gone down, and most impressionable girls that were the target audience when it came out have seen better. I LOVED the series when I was 16 (and had never had a boyfriend...) and for a while I flat out hated it, now I'm sort of apathetic. At least in the circle of people I know, I'm hard pressed to find anyone who has taken any lasting impressions of Twilight into their adult lives.

Now, adults who read Fifty Shades...I dunno, man.

But I think what you mentioned is honestly indicative of problems in YA fiction in general, not just Twilight. I really enjoy reading YA stuff now and then (they're usually fun and stupid reads, and every once in a while they're legitimately good and intelligent works of fiction) but emotionally abusive/manipulative relationships are pretty much the norm in the genre. I don't think Twilight started that trend, but I certainly does come off as the worst offender since the entire story is a romance (as opposed to a lot of other stories that are other things WITH romance).

Anyways, never thought I'd be defending Twilight. xD My point is, when I re-read them last summer, I had a lot of fun. Mostly because I was doing a running commentary and was just all BELLA GIRL NO.

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Originally Posted by Pheesh

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Originally Posted by Ayen

Never watched Showgirls, but I sat through the first Twilight movie once out of curiosity. Actually wasn't that bad, got some genuine laughs from me. When Edward isn't being a creeper he's an all right guy. From what I understand the movies improve upon the books. At least as much as they can.

Did I just praise Twilight? I have dishonored myself and my family. -impales self with sword-

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Edward is never not being a creeper though...

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There were some scenes, though not many, where he doesn't come across as creepy to me. Though when I say creeper, I'm mainly thinking about the scene where he watches Bella sleep.

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Relativey speaking, the books are way better than the movies. And the books aren't even as bad as most people make out. Sure, they're not GOOD, but they're not end of the world bad or anything. People act like it'd the worst series of all time when it really isn't. And they might not be good, but at least they're entertaining. I still hold my position that the worst thing media can do isn't be bad, or stupid, or offensive. The worst thing it can do is be boring.

Also, Sephex: Charlie's Bella's dad. And actually my favorite character in the series!

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I forgot to mention. My group of friends and I have an injoke where every guy with a mustache is named Mike by default.

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Originally Posted by Sephex

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Relativey speaking, the books are way better than the movies. And the books aren't even as bad as most people make out. Sure, they're not GOOD, but they're not end of the world bad or anything. People act like it'd the worst series of all time when it really isn't. And they might not be good, but at least they're entertaining. I still hold my position that the worst thing media can do isn't be bad, or stupid, or offensive. The worst thing it can do is be boring.

Also, Sephex: Charlie's Bella's dad. And actually my favorite character in the series!

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I forgot to mention. My group of friends and I have an injoke where every guy with a mustache is named Mike by default.

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Ah, okay. Because there's actually a character in the series who is named Mike, so you can understand the confusion! xD

>has a mustache
>is now named after his father

Getting back to the subject of Twilight, yeah, there are tons of negative things about the story in general, but I ultimately agree with Jinx where the story is simply mediocre more than anything.

In fact, it has got to the point that I think the people who are like, "LOL BETTER LOVE STORY THAN TWILIGHT LOL SPARKLING VAMPIRES" are far more annoying than people who genuinely enjoy the work. It's like, surprise, young people sometimes get into lame things. You being in your 20s and 30s trying to show desperately how much smarter/better you are than books aimed at tween girls doesn't make you look cool.

I don't like the Twilight either, and I had my fun poking fun at the series and fanbase, but that time has passed. Much like Justin Beiber, One Direction, Kanye West, or whatever pop culture things people bitch about, I only hear about such things because people trying SO HARD to place themselves on a pedestal won't SHUT THE HELL UP about them. Sure, it's okay to criticize some things, but it seems that some people out there make it their entire identity to hate things. It's such a waste of time.

And yes, I know I have made similar posts like this before. But yeah, uh TL;DR....Twilight it bad, but it's time to move on and stop trying to look cool by shooting at an easy target.

Scary movie 5. Or don't be a menace to South Central while drinking your juice in the hood

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Originally Posted by Shorty

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Originally Posted by Jinx

Relativey speaking, the books are way better than the movies. And the books aren't even as bad as most people make out. Sure, they're not GOOD, but they're not end of the world bad or anything. People act like it'd the worst series of all time when it really isn't. And they might not be good, but at least they're entertaining. I still hold my position that the worst thing media can do isn't be bad, or stupid, or offensive. The worst thing it can do is be boring.

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You're right in a sense; the worst thing for media is for it to be boring because boring media gets forgotten. Bad, stupid, and offensive things are remembered. The fact that the series romanticises the abuse and neglect of women, supports stalking is an acceptable form of flattery, that loss of identity when not clinging to a man they worship is normal, portrays women are sinners who beg for sex and overall supports the idea that defining oneself purely by their relationship is what we should strive for in life, among a myriad of other poor lessons to teach to women - especially young and impressionable women - makes it bad, stupid, and offensive.

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This is also because bad/stupid/offensive media acts as a foil to worthwhile, exemplary media. Things on either end of the spectrum are important because they, on one hand, can contain lessons, warnings, and ideas we can identify as being valuable. They can also contain lessons and ideas we can identify as being harmful. Bad examples are good to have around. Anything that falls in the middle is kind of useless, in that it doesn't lend itself to any progression whatsoever.

I agree that Twilight is particularly dangerous because, while it's very clear how something like 50 Shades of Grey contains harmful ideas and messages, Twilight isn't as heavy handed. It flies further under the radar.

Is this still on? Do you accept request?

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Originally Posted by Jinx

http://home.eyesonff.com/attachment....id=65274&stc=1

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i kind of want to watch showgirls now

You know Sam and I were talking not too long ago and I was pretty adamant that I'd never seen Showgirls

Boy is my face red

I can't believe I'd forgotten that I'd watched it

How bad must it have been

Alternatively how much had I had to drink

i cant believe you forgot a whole friendship with jinx

Who?