1. Your stealth abilities vary depending on whether the people you're sneaking past have a "!" sign above their head.
2. You give everything some kind of lame codename
3. You call your Celphone a "Codec"
4. You claim that nanomachines take over your body and they suppress your appitite so you go without eating for 5 days only to pass out from hunger.
Add to this list.
61. You need scissors.
There is nothing anyone could possibly say in this thread that would top this.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kawaii Ryűkishi
You wander around, crouched under boxes.
You start to notice security cameras everywhere.
You have a mullet.
You start smoking to see if they help you get past bank security
And so does everyone else you meet, inlcuding presidential bodyguards and elite commandos.[q=Dark_Paladin_Cecil]You wander around, crouched under boxes.[/q]And genuinely believe that nobody is going to notice.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dark_Paladin_Cecil
*You think that nobody'll notice you if you're standing right beside to them, since you're outside their "field of view".
*You like to crawl in narrow spaces, 'cause you think that lets you go into "intrusion mode" and move around in first-person view.
*You think you can cause a panic by neutralising a security guard, then wait for five minutes until everyone "returns to their positions" and acts like nothing ever happened.
*La-Li-Lu-Le-Lo.
*You don't trust the military - all the regular soldiers are dangerously stupid, and all the elites are terrorists. Always.
*You don't own a first-aid kit or SCUBA gear; instead you constantly carry freeze-dried rations. Everyone knows that they can restore LIFE.
*You think that every woman you ever meet is going to die a painful death.
*Irregular Special Forces operatives can withstand a dozen Stinger missiles, so why do we bother with tanks and planes during wartime?
*Events have a strange way of repeating themselves several times over, but there's always a lame yet convoluted excuse.
*You think that the world's best philosophers are all either teenaged university students or middle-aged mercenaries.
[q=Shoyku][q=Kawaii Ryűkishi]61. You need scissors.[/q]There is nothing anyone could possibly say in this thread that would top this.[/q]Agreed.
You become a Colinal in the marines and you tell your crew that in order to open a secured door you must "Stand in front of the door and press the X button, and the door should open.
Name:
I'm like you, I have no name.
Age:
Old enough to know what death looks like.
Address:
I'm a nomad, too.
Work experience:
I'm just a man who's good at what he does - killing.
What skill do you have with specialised equipment?
We're not tools of the government, or anyone else.
What can you bring to our company?
I don't give a crap about you or your company!
How do you feel our company can help you succeed?
You'll just slow me down.
Do you prefer to work alone or in a team?
Are you an Otaku too?
Describe your upbringing and early life:
I was born on the battlefield... raised on the battlefield... gunfire, sirens and screams - those were my lullabies.
Marital status:
I have no-one - nothing except the unit. Nothing else matters to me!
What is your opinion of discipline and enforcement in the workplace?
I don't blame you for wanting me dead.
when you stay close to the wall when ur walking around at home thinking there are camera's around
When u call a food....a ration...
When you think ur in the range of a sniper...
Don't joke about that! I really am!Quote:
Originally Posted by *ETERNAL FANTASY*
Well, there goes anything I ever had.Quote:
Originally Posted by Kawaii Ryűkishi
When you try to hide under a cardboard box to get out of cleaning your room
(Tried this)
*When you catch fire and try to put it out by changing costume REALLY quickly
*when you carry some coolant spray with you where ever you go
*when you try to diffuse a bomb but shooting things
*when this works
*when you make a chaff grenade out of some torn up tinfoil and a firecracker
you think that a bandana will give you infinte buttlets
I tried that once, the electical equipment blew up.Quote:
Originally Posted by Maxico
It probabaly got hit by the firecracker...
you start expecting doors to open on there own if you approach them with a credit card.
You don't believe in peripheral vision.
You buy a rubber bondage outfit, hoping this will make you less conspicuous when infiltrating military facilities.
You call your Playstation "VR training."
You think that all electronics will stop working by spraying them with coolent.
You can eat an entire meal in one bite, which instantly returns you to the peak of health. You refer to this as being 'realistic'.
This thread should have been closed immediately after Kishi's post. It's just perfect.
You consider arms as a passing thing that people lose all the time.
-You knock on walls to distract your parents so you can sneak out of the house.
-You swing a sword carelessly telling people its perfectly safe because you already pressed square.
-You wonder why the fire department doesn't use cans of coolant spray.
-You wonder why the bomb disposal squads didn't replace the wire snipping method with coolant spray.
-You replace all of your fire extinguishers and bug sprays with coolant sprays.
-You crawl along the floor to gat past land mines.
-You desperately search for a helicopter and expect it to drop you a bos with a stinger missile launcher every time you see a harrier jet fly nearby.
You think the "Patriots" are after you because you managed to download stuff without paying for it.