Inspired by the "You know you've been playing Metal Gear Solid too much..." thread.
You Know You've Played Too Much Zelda If:
1. You stand on a block of wood and shoot arrows at the sun until they catch on fire.
2. You find a hungry pig blocking your driveway and feed it some meat hoping that it will somehow disappear.
3. You return the dog that the lady next door lost and demand a piece of her heart in return.
4. You go to a trashy hotel after midnight, go up next to the only toilet, flush it repeatedly and wonder why no hand pops out.
5. You dress up as Ganondorf for Halloween and have your friend dress up as Link. He uses his sword and pretends to kill you. You spit out fake red blood. The next year, you and your friend dress up the same, and he attacks you again. This time, you spit out fake green blood.
6. Your aunt and uncle are moving to a new house and don’t have the strength to lift up their refrigerator. You say, “I can help! I’m wearing a golden bracelet!”
7. You rent a horse, ride it to the Grand Canyon and ride it at full speed trying to jump over it.
8. You go to a chicken farm, put on a dog mask, and march around playing the flute, hoping that the little chicks will follow you and magically turn into hens.
9. After you get married, you insist that everybody calls you Honey and her Darling.
10. You take a geography test and are asked to name the seven continents. Your answer is “There’re only four! Hyrule, Termina, Labrynna, and Holodrum! And Kohonolit Island doesn’t count because it’s just imaginary!”
11. You go to the local jeweler and ask him where his two pet snakes are.
12. You go to the aquarium with a frog, give it to the main scientist there and ask him why he isn’t eating it.
13. You see a beggar on the streets of a big city and show him some bugs in a bottle. He replies, “Give me some beer, for free, for free.”
14. You start a religious cult that you call, “Believers of the existence of the Triforce in OoT!”
15. Black Widow spiders don’t frighten you at all, but red and blue ones scare you to death.
16. You can recite, word for word, Shiek/Princess Zelda’s speech to you while in the Temple of Time. Your friend, also a Zelda fanatic, insists that Zelda held the Triforce of Courage and Link held the Triforce of Power. You never speak to him, ever again.
17. You know the answer to this question, and would bet your life upon it, “Where is the Triforce in Ocarina of Time?”
18. You set the Ocarina on a certain button as soon as you get it, and get really mad when your little sister plays your game and moves it to another one.
19. You know Link’s last name.
20. You find any, yes any, of the women in OoT or MM to be attractive.
21. You’ve found any of this to be funny.
22. You learn Japanese for the sole purpose of writing a letter to Shigeru Miyamoto.
23. Whenever you’re sick, you tell your mom, “I don’t need any medicine. Just give me some red potion. And if you could put it in a glass bottle, that would be great.”
24. When you’re about to die, you suddenly realize that you’ve never played Ocarina of Time or Majora’s Mask with a rumble pack. You tell your eldest child to change your epitaph to “John Smith, known as Link37485 until just before his death when he changed his name. His reason: ‘I am unworthy.’”
25. You are scared to death of trampolines unless you have your purple sunglasses, your bow and arrow, and your toy sword.
