Attention Everybody (Please leave a comment)

One of my older half-brothers died today,
he's been suffering for over a year with a brain tumor, so it was probably for the best. I feel kinda guilty.
Everybody is naturally sad, but I... I'm actually not that sad about it. Is that totally outrageous?
I don't know why... I guess it's because a part of me knows that he's so much better without all the constant suffering... still, I feel kinda guilty for feeling this way.

Am I completely horrible or is it natural to feel this way?

R.I.P
My Dear Brother

http://www.maryland-us.com/animated/rose.gif
"When the night has been too lonely and the road has been too long
And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong
Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow
Lies the seed that with the sun's love... in the spring... becomes the rose"

:( I don't really know you much, but I share the pain and know what's it like to lose a member of your family to death. :( With much regards, I send you and your family my condolence.

I am sorry, Chris. :(

And no, it's not too unnatural to feel that way. You realise that he's in a better place, free of suffering, and that isn't a sad thought.

That sucks, man.

It's not horrible to feel that way. It might not even have hit you yet. We all deal with grief in our own ways.

I'm sorry:(

And I agree with Psy. He stiopped suffering. You realize that he is happier place now.

Thanks guys :(

Sorry Chris, I don't really know what else to say except I hope he is in a better place.

:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:

I'm so sorry about this.

I'm writing a story about a girl who loses a dear friend. Maybe if you write your thoughts down, you'll feel better?

Maybe, thanks :(

It makes me sad when someone is sad.

*Thinks of a thought*

GROUP HUGGLE!

*Huggles Chris*

Feel better now?

A little, thanks :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Chris

A little, thanks :)

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Yay.:)

I hope you aren't allergic to chocolate.

*Gives chocolate*

Thank you, you've been most kindly.

But I think I need to get to bed now, my eyes are burning.

Please continue to leave comments, I'll read them in the morning.

Take care all,

Chris :)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Chris

Thank you, you've been most kindly.

But I think I need to get to bed now, my eyes are burning.

Please continue to leave comments, I'll read them in the morning.

Take care all,

Chris :)

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Sleep is good.:)

Tommarow will be a new day.:)

I think it took me a while to realise I was dumped. Yes it's not the same thing but I'm uninitiated in the realm of facing a close person's death. Anyway, here's hoping that if you end up going through the mourning period (I would imagine it to be quite emotional), it will be something you can handle.

Took me a year to get over my last breakup...*sigh*

well if you were close to him it probobly has'nt hit in yet. Ya know your brain refuses it. it will probobly start to kick in when you talk about him or try to call him on teh phone and realize hes not there :(

I recently lost a freind but i only imagine what pain your feeling haveing soemone ripped away form you so close.

Sorry to hear about the loss.
Like you said, at least he is no longer suffering.

May he rest in peace.

I'm sorry about your brother, Chris, but what you're feeling sounds quite normal to me. I've gone through this myself with a few family members and in the end you actually feel almost happy just because they're not suffering anymore. You're not horrible and don't feel guilty.

I'm sorry about that, Chris. It took me months to even really greive over my great grandmother. I hope when you are ready to let go, you'll be able to find the same support you have around here.

It's completely normal. When my grandma was dying of lung cancer, In her last few days she told me not to cry cause she was ready to go and finally make it to that better place. I didnt understand at the time, But my dad said she was in such pain, and she wasnt scared or sad in her last hours.

I know how you feel. It's good that you feel like that though, because you know he's not suffering anymore. Everyone usually feels the same way you do.

I'm sorry about your half-brother though. :(

We're forced to study human reactions to such things as the death of loved ones as psychology majors, so I would say that it seems you were able to accept his death, and I think that's very healthy, considering you knew it was probably coming and could see he was suffering.

Even though you miss him, I'm sure you know he's happier now and you'll see him again.

I'm sorry for your loss.

.

my condolences man!

Losing a loved one, even after a prolonged bout with cancer or disease, is never a subject you can completely prepare yourself for. Until the loss happens, you cannot know how you'll react or how long it'll take before it sinks in. There may always be a bit of a void left because this person, I'm assuming, held a special place in your heart, and yet, that being said, perhaps take some solace in that he will never truly be gone. So long as you cherish his legacy, you recall all the good times you had with him, the courage he displayed these last years of his life, and the memories that will always be a part of your life, he will continue to live on as well.

We all grieve differently, depending on who we are, who we lost, and the circumstances surrounding the loss. That being said, you have handled this situation, from my point of view, with dignity, grace, and an obvious love for him, and perhaps the greatest tribute you can make is to live your life to the fullest with him always in your heart.

May you all find some lasting wonderful memory to hang on to during this trying experience, and hopefully, everyone will grow stronger and closer together as you all move forward.

Take care all.

My heart truly goes out to you Chris. :cry:

I don't really know what else to say...umm...maybe this can show you how that your reaction isn't horrible.

When my dear grandma died three years ago it all seemed surreal to me. Like it wasn't happening. I cried only once at the funeral but that once wasn't even for her. It was the look on my poor uncles face as he carried the coffin that reduced me to tears. I remember feeling guilty as all my cousins openly showed their emotion, while my face was dry. It was not until about a week later that it truly "hit" me and I could really grieve the loss of my Grandma.

What I'm trying to say is, maybe it all hasn't "hit" you yet. I mean, it hasn't been long. You're probably still in a state of shock.

My condolences to you and your family.
May he rest in peace.

I can't really add anything else to what's already been said, Chris.

I offer my condolences to you, your family and your friends.

I'm sorry. :( *Hugs* I know how you feel...when my granddad died, I never cried. The only thing I remember about his death was feeling excited coz his photo came in the newspaper. So that makes me a very bad person... :cry:

But I think that maybe you are sad...it's just that you've accepted his death. Maybe...

:( No, if my sis would be suffering too, I mean it'd be for her best if her suffering stopped... A friend of mine dyed with a tumour too... that was horrible...

I'm very sorry..My my condolences to your family and you...

Anything I'll say here is a repition of what others have said Chris. But I am truly sorry for your loss. You will get through it though. He has gone on to a better place where there is no suffering, so there is no need to feel guilty about being happy about that. Where he is now, he wouldnt want you to feel guilty about it.

amra

Sorry Chris. I know how hard it is to lose someone very close to you. At least you know he's off in a better place, and you can accept that.

Be comforted in knowing that his suffering has ended, and that where he has gone there is no pain, only everlasting love. You are grieving for him in a way. You have accepted his death as a release, and are taking solace in those thoughts.

It is a good idea for you to write down your thoughts and feelings, and also your memories of your brother and what he has given to you, taught you and how he has affected your life. Encourage others to do the same too, as it will help you work through the grieving process.

Also, when you are going through the process of grieving, the state you are in will change. Doing as I have suggested could bring on a flood of emotions and memories which you should prepare for that they do not overwhelm you.

Be at peace. And be there for your family.

We don't grieve because our loved one has died, we grieve because they have gone where we cannot follow, and we will miss them in this life until the next.

Things happen, and we lament, and finally reach our last catharsis with one final weeping tear before we finally are over it.

It takes time and action to realize what actually has happened, and how different things will be, but in the end, we all will come to realize that such is life, and that when we prosper, it is we who triumph.

"Hard times don't endure; Hard people do"
-My Room-mates Drill Seargent

I think it's very commendable that you feel the way you do chris, because it's important that when you lose someone dear to you, that you see the potential positives in the midst of the negatives. The clear positives in this case are that your brother was in pain and was not living with a satisfactory quality of life, but is now at peace. All we can do is hope he is in a better place, and be happy that the suffering he endured has now ended.
Keep strong.

Well, I don't think I've ever spoke to you Chris, But, like verybody else I offer my condolences.
I don't think you are a bad person at all, When I found out my cousin was dying from lukemia I didn't cry, because I sort of had already come to that conclusion. Also, I did not cry muhc when my Great-Grandma died, even though I loved her, I knew sooner or later she would pass away.
And, this may not be much help, but at least you know you had the chance to say goodbye, and his death did not come as a shock. My aunty died in a car crash, I think her death has affected me most out the people I have written about, this is because I never got to say goodbye- I think this is an important thing to be able to do.

Man Chris, I don't know you, but I do feel your pain as well.

I have lost many family members to cancer and heart failure, I only what 24, and there is only one generation left ahead of me.

However, I may not be able to relate to the same extent as you, as I haven't lost a sibling to death. However I can say that I too wasn't sadden by their deaths. I knew that their suffering was over, and for that I was glad. Now, I do miss them, and am sad that they are not here with me anymore, but I never thought their death was a horrible thing, so I would think it's a normal way to feel.

My thoughts are with you, I am hoping you can stop feeling guilty over this. I know it's a tough time, but it's not your fault, nor is it bad to be glad that his suffering is over.

Thanks to all of you.

It's nice to know that you care :)

I've only read the first post, but my God, Chris, I'm sorry about all of this. :( *hugs* You take care, alright? And I sort-of know what you mean about the not being sad thing... everyone deals with death in their own way, and maybe this is yours. As you said, if he's without pain now, at least he's been able to move on from that...

I hope you and your family will be okay. You'll be in my thoughts.

May he rest in peace. And I'm sure that he's more happy in death, now that he's free from the suffering.

I'm very sorry about this. Cancer is bad stuff. I wish you and your family the best of things to come.

Be at peace, younger brother of Chris.

That's so sad... I feel bad. Rest in Peace...

i feel bad..i'll be praying for you and i hope ur lost oved one is in a better place...... :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: