The Most Controversial Thread in the Universe.

I want to talk about farting. I don't want to be derogatory, I don't want to be nasty, but I want to be frank. Girls DO fart. My boyfriend maintains that girls are incapable of such an act, and we simply "fluff" but my boyfriend is naive. I am a girl, and I fart.

I would like for you to peruse this thread with an open mind, and discussing farting. Talk about embarrassing farts of your own, or others around you, talk about what makes you fart, or talk about how you don't fart at all because you're too prissy.

Once I was in health class, and I sat at the front of the row. I sneezed and farted at once. Luckily, the sneeze covered the noise, and the odor was masked by the grease traps outside the window. Man, I am smooth.

Please take this thread seriously. I think if we can talk about shower peeing, we can talk about farting. Thanks for your stories, and for your time.

This one time in food class I was dead asleep while the teacher was talking about the food pyramid. The Incident goes as follows:
"and finally at the top of the food pyramid we have *snore FRRRRRRRRRT!*"
And thats why I was banned from the home-ec room.

my computer chair smells like fart
really need to get a new one

Ironically enough, I've got some bad gas right now. Lucky for me, it doesn't smell too bad.

Anyway, the only time it ever embarassed me, I was sleeping in my 8th grade reading class. I woke up just in time to fart. I was embarassed, went back to sleep. Looking back, that was pretty cool.

Bah. The only time I ever get caught is when I haven't done it and have just made an awkward noise with a chair.

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Originally Posted by Not At All Reno

my computer chair smells like fart
really need to get a new one

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I had that problem in the dorms my freshman year of college.

Breaking wind isn't something I like to talk about. Although it's a natural part of life, it's not exactly the most dignifying thing in the world, and it should be ... left under the covers. :)

Does this mean that Raine flatulates in bed?! :O!

*finally stops laughing*
Ok, ok *chuckles* ... Ok, so why exactly is this a topic to be discussed on this forum? I mean, farting is what me and my friends do to kill time and possibly each other. And why did a female start this? And what's there to discuss? You want to hear stories like "This one time in first grade we were all sitting on the floor for story time, and I was right in the middle and let out this huge fart that made the teacher stop reading and the entire class turned and looked at me so I turned to the guy behind me and went 'EWWWWWW!!!!!'" (True story)

That's the exact point she's making. Women fart too. =/ Why is it such a big deal that a woman started the thread? Ah, whatever. I'm not going to become a feminist today.

Anyhow, there was this REALLY embarrassing time in fourth grade was I was up in front of the class reading a book report when one ripped unexpectedly. I was already the major geek in class so of course everyone had a reall good laugh.
Then in sixth grade we were all at this pool for our swimming lessons and I let one rip there too accidently. o.o Everyone noticed. =/
Thankfully I haven't been caught any other time because it does bother me when I'm caught. I try to take it to a bathroom or try to at least make it as queit and unnoticeable as possible.
Living with Myles though I think I'd had a few cases where's he's tickled me and a few came out. Although he's had the same happen with him. Ahhh, thanks for our comfortable relationship. :cool:

I made this thread because we were talking about it in chat, or some people were talking about it in chat and I was giggling, and I wondered why no one had ever made a thread about it. We've had plenty of threads about peeing in the shower, at least two or three since I've been a member. And I wonder strange things too, like what kind of farter ARE all of you? Are you sneaky? Are you proud farters? Are you SBD farters?

I myself, am a sneaky farter. No one ever knows just what they heard, muahahaha!

I am definitely a proud farter when around other guys. If a girl's around, I usually try to mask it (but they usually smell it in the end).

Man, and all this time i was told that biologically girlz are not able to fart. Boy was i ever wrong. (If girls fart, they hide it pretty damn well)

what about farting WHILE peeing in the shower at the same time?
OOOH kinky!

This must be a pretty boring universe.

You are all fools.

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Originally Posted by strawberryman222

You are all fools.

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. . . who fart.

I still can't believe there was a thread about peeing in the shower. Wait, I didn't make that one, did I? -can't remember- X_x;
I remember the one about when you think you should flush the toilet.

I have a theory about girls fart's, and why they are rare, but stink oh so much worse.

Each person has a certain resevoir of "fartiness" inside them, that cannot be replaced. Throughout one's life, that resevoir is slowly depleted, and when it is gone, the person dies. Therefore, each person in a lifetime needs to get red of all of this "fartiness." Girls fart much less often, because they are all prissy and girly like that. However, the consequence is that each fart needs to carry off more "fartiness," and therefore they stink more.

err....or, what was I just saying? Oh yeah, girls obviously fart too.

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Originally Posted by Quina

This must be a pretty boring universe.

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Hahahahaha!

That's the funniest thing that's been said in this thread.

Everyone has the same butt organs and/or digestive system. Everybody farts. Especially Abominatrix's cats. Freaking gross...

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Originally Posted by fire_of_avalon

I think if we can talk about shower peeing, we can talk about farting.

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Don't forget guys tucking their cash and prizes between their legs to see what they'd look like as a girl. That was my favorite.

I fart, out loud when I'm at home with those I live with, bot I'd never do it out in public. smurfing gross.

I got spanked for farting in front of a guest by my psychotic dad. :( It makes you learn.

The creator of man chose for farts not to come from the nostrils, ears, or even lips, but from the two biggest hunks of meat on the human body, with just the right amount of pressure and moisture to make an amusing, high-pitched noise.

If you do not laugh at farts, you are disrespecting whatever deity you choose to believe in.

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Originally Posted by ShlupQuack

Don't forget guys tucking their cash and prizes between their legs to see what they'd look like as a girl. That was my favorite.

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...I.... I do not remember this. :confused:

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Originally Posted by fire_of_avalon

...I.... I do not remember this. :confused:

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It was a long time ago. I was very amused by people's answers, especially Scottie who immediatly went to try it out and promptly freaked at the sight of himself in the mirror without his bits and pieces.

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Originally Posted by Not At All Reno

my computer chair smells like fart
really need to get a new one

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Oh god I thought I was the only one.

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Originally Posted by ShlupQuack

It was a long time ago. I was very amused by people's answers, especially Scottie who immediatly went to try it out and promptly freaked at the sight of himself in the mirror without his bits and pieces.

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I didn't think that any thread could be nearly as amusing as a fart thread (yes I am immature - go on, label me!) but now I'm gonna desperately search the forum for this gem of a thread!

Oh yeah, topic. Hmm... When my best friend friend and I went to Malta we spent the entire holiday farting then laughing til we cried. Ah, the good old days... :D

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Originally Posted by ShlupQuack

Don't forget guys tucking their cash and prizes between their legs to see what they'd look like as a girl. That was my favorite.

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Wow, I remember that thread. I don't remember my response. I do remember Mik's. I remember it both confused and intrigued at the same time. I had no idea what he was talking about.

Anyway, these threads are fun. Almost as fun as farting. Carry on.