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I think with me it's a bit of both. I can be difficult to get to know properly and in that aspect I usually have to approach people to start up a conversation because a lot of people don't think that they can do so with me. On the other hand, I have certain qualities that apparently make me stand out and this attracts people with the same/compatible qualities more easily, and THESE types of people usually speak to me first.
In short, it's hard for me to make good friends but the ones I have are all the better for it.
I think I definitely choose my friends. There's a lot of people I know I don't allow to get to know me, because I avoid them and am not necessarily honest to them when I speak with them.
friends usually come to me. i'm not the best at approaching others.
I'm not a socializer, therefore anyone who admits to being my friend has to also admit they were on some level drawn to me for whatever reason that may not have an explanation. All that I know is I have perhaps 6 or so friends in life (only two or three of whom I communicate with regularly) though I've had perhaps a total of 20 or so sporadically throughout my life. Being anti-social, I for the most part, have no friends, at least none that live nearby. The closest friends I can communicate with regularly are the "friends" I have on this site. Though you're all mostly acquaintances who don't automatically shun me for my personality.
I choose whichever friends cost the least per hour to hire, so I guess it's me that chooses them.
I'm definitely more of a chooser, because I'm fairly picky about who I let close to me.
I'm not very good at making friends because I'm such a reclusive person. It's not because I dislike people, but just, well, I value my space.
I wouldn't mind getting to know a lot of the people here better (outside of just EoFF and Facebook) but I'm far too shy to take the initiative. It's the thought that counts?
Pike, you're awesome.
I've been feeling much the same way recently.
I choose you, friends! Use tackle!
I'm not very trusting of others deep down and, because of the type of person I am, I try not to spread myself too thin with the wrong kind of people. I definitely choose my friends and there are only three who I frequently interact with.
Most of my friends have kinda just happened or happened through mutual friends. Most often, I'd say other people tend to choose and I just kinda go with it because I like to give people the benefit of the doubt that they aren't horrible people. Luckily, most of them haven't been.
I think I can only recall one time me approaching someone and then us being friends. Usually it's them coming up to me or me being introduced to them through mutual people. I do have anxiety about meeting with new people. I'm not introverted if I'm around them enough though.
I could have become friends with James from college as he and I were very similar. However, his personality reminded me of who I was in high school, which was insanely creepy anti-social. So I stopped talking to him. Probably the only person on God's green Earth that I "kicked to the curb."
I somehow ended up with a ridiculous number of friends and acquaintances through doing a bunch of different kinds of work and now I have random people texting me at all hours asking if I want to hang out or go with them to their friends' barbecues and such. Which I would, if Sarah and I weren't so busy all the time. I'm the kind of guy that picks his friends because he has a complex about letting people get too close to him (also because there are a few kinds of people I just don't want to associate with because there's no way I want to deal with whatever drama and crap I know they will eventually drag me into) but I somehow ended up being very close to a huge number of people that I have very few things in common with. I guess having a large, eclectic group of friends is a good thing, but I can't feeling that I'm a little too close to some of those people.
I got no friends because I like to cry at one corner of the orphanage thinking of my sister!!!
Will anyone be my friend? I will save you just in case you fall off the cliff while looking for your dead mom in some creepy mountains! :(