You might not want to post your essays on the internet, because you never know which sites Turnitin (or Turnitin-esque sites) will scan and snap you for plagiarism.

I'm not sure which spiders EoFF allows in though, so maybe an admin could shed some light.

But on the essay, since it is a fairly formal literary response, you probably want to avoid using personal pronouns, such as "I", "my", "we", etc. and avoid use of superlatives and colloquial language.
As foa said, the text has a robotic feel to it, so try to concatenate a few sentences here and there, to create a more fluid flow of points.
Be careful not to fall into storytelling; discuss the technology (or the relevant part of the essay question) in Asimov's novels, but not the events to the same extent. You want to communicate an appropriate answer to the question and nothing more.

Other that that, your spelling and grammar is very good and you have well formed paragraphs, so no need to worry there.

The best advice with essay writing I ever had was, for each pararaph, to use the "SEX(D)" template: Statement, Explanation, eXample (Diagram if applicable).
The statement lets the reader know what the contents of the paragraph.
The explanation describes the meaning of the statement and why it is true.
The example takes exerpts and quotes from your sources, and illustrates the statement.'
The diagram is not applicable here, but if you ever have a geography essay to write, draw pictures!