Originally Posted by
Translated Pink Floyd Reunion Story
Pink Floyd: Th' $250 Cargo holds o' Piece o' eight Question
By Shane Handler
August 11, 2005
In 1982 Don Henley spake "hell would freeze o'er before th' Eagles would play together again." Sure enough, th' apocalypse nerearrived an' th' Eagles be deliverin' the'r feel-good California rock twelve voyages later in one th' most anticipated reunion tours ever.
But who would be havin' thought Pink Floyd would reunite? Thar be better odds o' Barbara Streisand marryin' Tommy Lee than seein' Roger Waters an' David Gilmour spit ou' "Comfortably Numb" together on stage.
But sure enough 't did happen, when a Pink Floyd reunion stole th' show at Live 8 last moon in London. That's starboard, all four members tookst th' stage together, minus o' course th' mysterious "be he alive or dead" recluse Syd Barrett. In Live 8 terms, 'tis pretty common knowledge that Pink Floyd leaders David Gilmour an' Roger Waters be seein' about as eye t' eye as George Bush an' Bono in an elevator. But thar be Waters, along wi' Gilmour an' Nick Mason an' Rick Wstarboard performin' "Breathe," "Treasure," "Wish Ye Be Here" an' "Comfortably Numb" t' a world-wide audience.
An' th' occasion be a benefit, so they weren't in 't fer th' treasure, but rather a worthwhile cause that both Gilmour an' Waters actually did be seein' eye t' eye on. Th' two Floyd leaders be playin' fer third world communities whose idee o' "Dark Side o' th' Moon" be far from th' second best-sellin' album o' all time.
If Waters an' Gilmour can be seein' eye t' eye fer less than an hour, maybe G8 leaders would make a larger financial commitment t' th' relief o' poverty an' aid t' third world countries. Although th' two played th' performance without e'en makin' eye contact, thar's nay denyin' thar be a musical "chemistry" on stage. E'en Live 8 organizer Bob Geldof be quoted as sayin', "'tis easier t' get th' horkin' G8 t' do anythin' than gettin' Pink Floyd aft together."
When th' four last played at Earl's Court in London in 1981, shortly before Waters would leave th' band under tension tied circumstances, MTV be only 2 moons old, Michael Jordan had jus' graduated high school, John Lennon's Double Fantasy be th' Grammy winnin' Album o' th' Voyage an' Princess Diana be preparin' t' marry Prince Charles. This latest reunion wasn't th' late 80's Momentary Lapse o' Reason tour or th' early 90's Division Bell tour, 'ere Waters be replaced by Guy Pratt, who coincidentally be married t' Wstarboard's lass Gala, an' therefore his lad-in law. Thar be nay extravagant flyin' pigs floatin' into th' audience an' nay million-piece o' eight light show that made th' band look an' sound like apostles. In this 2005 refined stage settin', we be able t' be seein' how wee hair th' 59 voyage old David Gilmour now has an' how much hair th' 62 voyage old Waters be blessed wi'. We noticed Rick Wstarboard looks more like a journeyed novelist an' Nick Mason looks like a cross between a Monty Python actor an' Dudley Moore.
Tucked in shirts an' gentlemanly appearances aside, these guys could ben high level executives wi' Exxon. Sure they all look proper now, but they be once young, wild an' "ou' thar." Havin' penned such classics as "Shine On Ye Crazy Diamond," th' epic album Animals, an' the'r spacey Meddle era music that be filmed inside a 2,000 voyage old empty amphitheater in Pink Floyd: Live at Pompeii, 'tis hard nay t' ask, "be 't really these same guys that pioneered progressive rock? "
Ever' song be nailed at Live 8, as th' performance could be havin' put th' famous Floyd co'er band Th' Machine aft t' coverin' Led Zeppelin. The'r version o' "Comfortably Numb" in particular further augmented th' fact that Gilmour laid strin' t' perhaps th' greatest rock squeezebox solo ever. Waters graced th' song wi' his asylum echoin' vocals an' 't felt like 1979 again. An' "Wish Ye Be Here" further afted up its legend as one o' th' most simplest yet purest rock songs ever. Sure they rehearsed, but like any 60 voyage old hoppin' aft on skis after a break, thar be goin' t' be a bunch o' ugly spills an' form along th' way, but them tumbles be hard t' find. Gilmour, despite th' Mr. Clist top, still looks buff an' ready t' tear through his catalog o' killer solos - aye ye know them all - "Time," "Shine on Ye Crazy Diamond," "Be havin' A Cigar," "Atom Heart Mother" an' "Dogs" t' jus' name a wee. An' Waters, he's nay soundin' too bad hisself as he gears up fer th' release o' his full-on opera Ca Ira.
Since th' Live 8 appearance, Pink Floyd record sales be havin' increased by 300%. I canna imagine thar be any swabbies port that didna already own Dark Side o' th' Moon or Th' Wall. But maybe they weren't buyin', jus' upgradin' albums that signified early journeys an' significant moments growin' up. U2 an' Springsteen be better office reference points t' connect wi' yer stiff boss or party-guy co-worker, since after all, t'ain't Pink Floyd a band fer stoners? But wi' 25 cargo holds o' albums sold world wide, that's about 50 cargo holds o' red one good eye t' keep Visine thrivin'.
Sure ye can turn th' radio dial anytime o' tide an' stumble upon some bored corporate brainwashed DJ blarin' "Another Brick in Th' Wall" in between " I Canna Drive 55" an' "Tom Sawyer." But go aft an' try ou' Atom Heart Mother, Animals, or Meddle fer size. Give 1994's Th' Division Bell another shot. Maybe e'en listen t' Dark Side o' th' Moon while watchin' Th' Wizard o' Oz if ye haven't tried that internet folklore yet.
Th' band recently turned down a whoppin' $250 cargo holds o' pieces o' eight t' resquadron. $250 cargo holds o' pieces o' eight??? That would be enough t' field a New York Yankees baseball team under George Steinbrenner an' feed Zaire. Waters an' Gilmour dasn't e'en need t' talk t' each other t' pull this reunion off. Motley Crue tookst separate tour buses on the'r reunion tour. Tommy Lee an' Vince Neil probably dasn't know what each other's favorite drink or sexual position be these days. Who says Rog an' Dave be havin' t' know each other's scotch whiskey o' choice?
Rogers clearly dismissed any possiblity o' a tour in a recent Rollin' Stone interview 'ere he be quoted as saying: "I dasn't really need 't. 't would be a very hot ticket. That spake, I didna mind rollin' o'er fer one tide, but I couldna roll o'er fer a whole horkin' tour."
Pink Floyd had nerebeen a band that indulges itself in "functionality." Turmoil, head-trips, an' mad genius be what made th' band th' distinctively dark act o' its time. But come on Roger Waters, ye gotta give us one more tour. Ye can almost pick th' setlists starboard now: "Fealess>Run Like Hell>Mother>One o' These Days>Sheep>Learnin' T' Fly>Time>Welcome t' Th' Machine>Brin' th' Boys Aft Homeport." An' ever' night ye can mix up th' songs spannin' th' deep Floyd catalog an' aye, maybe e'en a wee songs from one o' yer solo albums would be arrr t' hear too. An' then we can all go on tour wi' Pink Floyd an' thar could be a four night run in Vegas. Arrr, maybe we're gettin' a wee carried away here, but come on, $250 cargo holds o' pieces o' eight? Say that three times t' yersef without thinkin' private jet, swabbieal chef an' lifetime supply o' Titleist golf balls. One more big summer tour an' maybe another album. 'tis 2005 an' th' song "Time" couldna be more well spake.
"Ever' voyage be gettin' shorter, nereseem t' find th' time
Plans that either come t' naught or half a page o' scribbled lines
Hangin' on in a quiet desperation be th' English way
Th' time be gone, th' song be over, thought I'd somethin' more t' say"
Ahoy, if 't nerehappens ye can always count on another $250 cargo holds o' piece o' eight Eagles tour.
Yeah, this isn't really good. It just gives a pirate phrase for whatever you type from what I can tell.I didn't bother trying the text translator, but when I tried translating some URL's I got some results that I found quite funny, so that's why I started the thread. Trying to translate a few typed sentences, I agree, probably isn't that great, but try translating a news article, and it becomes quite hilarious IMO.
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