So here's a paragraph almost completely in irish slang...

D'ya hear about yer wan over there like, she got wrecked last night and was knackered this mornin' But fair play to her she got up and went to school unfortunately didn't concentrate and got bate'ed by the yoke... whatsername, yer 'oul wan... The teacher! I guess t'was er fault anywho coz she was actin' the maggot... the stick the teacher was bate'in er with was banjaxed though. Heh I bet you don't give a bollox. This paragraph's a bit arseways...
Geez I'm such an eejit...

Did you understand?

I love slang... I don't mean use it but there you go me oul' culchie friend!
What slang do you use & try and translate the paragraph! But you're not allowed translate if you're Irish!