I dunno, have Greg and Paul steal all her office supplies so that she can't do anything important that she wants to do. Then like, have John challenge her to a game of Dungeons & Dragons or something. But then when she's gone for a sec, to get like, office supplies, put that 10 packs of pencils back where her pencils were and she'll be all "OMGLOL THER WR PENCLS THER ALREDY LmA0!" Then you could throw all the rest of your stuff at her I guess, apart from the soda, I'd drink a can, and make Paul and Greg fight over one of the cans on the desk of Mrs. Whatever. Then she'll be disorientated and such. You could keep the lighter and maybe the text book as well, something has to be set on fire, and just to spite her, you could get a ladder and fill in each individual hole in the ceiling so that she can't count them anymore. Then right at the end run up to her face and be like "smurf" and punch her or something.