Originally Posted by
Iceglow
I've had my revenge on people though the ultimate revenge I once recieved on someone was in the end not worth it, sure I destroyed someones life, gave them severe depression, made people threaten that if he even showed up at the same gig as them by accident even he'd get beaten up or stabbed or stuff. What did that cost me? 50% of my mates hated me for it, the other 50% were disappointed, disliked my actions, told me to drop it repeatedly and never again dared risk my ire meaning they became suck ups...it was the best friends the true friends however who left me. I've wrecked someone's life they've got it sorted, under control but even something so little as an e-mail from me saying "sorry I can't apologise enough for what happened all those years ago but things have changed and believe me when I say to you I paid for my actions tenfold..." can set them off in a way that whilst they're all defensively angry they're hurt, threatened even by me saying that to them...I don't want their friendship. I don't even want to be a part of their life but I wanted to apologise.
5 years down the line now, I've got a small circle of close friends of which a minor hand full even knew me at all back then or knew me properly at that time, I look back and think what a jerk was I and accept fully that even though some of the many things I have been through and lived to tell the tale of have been sheer dumb luck (or the lack thereof) and even though I know I didn't deserve those things to happen to me, they're punishment for that series of actions.
So am I vengeful? Not now, I learnt a lesson about revenge, it bites you in the ass 2 times harder than you dished it out. I could have had revenge on so many people since for betraying me, hurting me, even near killing me...yet have I? No, because if I do I'm not the better man I'd like to think I've become.
