Ah, Sexiest Female. It's always this category that makes me glad that I'm a heterosexual, single male. Sup ladies.
Oh wait, most of you are in healthy relationships aren't you. Well, screw that then. Let's just get this over with so I can go home and master baiting fishing line.
In this category we have six repeat nominees, yet last time's winner, Agrias, is missing. foa, Jess, Lekana, ShlupQuack, and smittenkitten are all looking to fare better than last time (that is, win), while (relative) newcomers Jojee, KoShiatar, and Rye are also aiming for glory.
Let's meet the candidates, shall we?
fire_of_avalon:
foa had a two-in-a-row streak winning this award before the last Ciddies. Now she's back again and sexier than ever, ready to put all these others to shame. Everyone loves foa, she's a longtime CK, and she's pretty much just completely awesome. Will foa be the New England Patriots of Sexiest Female?
Jess:
Jess is the quintessential English beauty. As if this wasn't enough, she also wears Trilby hats, which just doubles her sexiness. We've been over this before, but it's worth mentioning again how she's also pretty much the ultimate girl. She probably likes her sport and her beer more than you do! There aren't many girls out there who'll not only put up with you and your football, but out-do you for cheering and then drink you under the table at the pub afterwards. With all of this combined, it's no wonder she's here. Also, she's only ever won one Ciddie, if BoB's EoFF Hall of Fame is up to date! Could this be her chance for (second) glory?
Jojee:
Joy is an Asian man and obviously some people think this makes her qualified for the Sexiest Female award. I asked Dyslexicon/Araciel to describe Joy in three words. Let's have a look at the results:
[q=Me and Araciel/Dyslexicon]Rob says:
if you had to describe joy in three words, what would those words be
Rob says:
joy like jojo the asian person, not joy the emotion obviously
James says:
Computer-Generated Azn.[/q]
It is evident that Joy's sexiness is completely CG, and thus I declare her ineligible for this award. However, since I can't actually do that, we'll have to see how computer-generated sexiness compares with the real-life kind. (no offense intended joyjoy
)
KoShiatar:
The newest addition to the EoFF staff (not Staff) (also not staph) plays video games for a living, and her favorite FF game is FFVI. How is that NOT sexy?
Lekana:
She was nominated for three MLT Get Together Awards, she's become increasingly popular lately, and she has boobs. According to her lesbian lover, when asked for three words to describe her:
[q=Jojojojojojojojo and me again]Joy says:
KC: voluptuous, titillating, and bodalicious ;D
Joy says:
TITillating especially
Rob says:
xD i already mentioned boobs
Joy says:
that's a real word
Joy says:
XD
Joy says:
it means captivating
Rob says:
i know![/q]
Has Ms. Kaycee titillated our voters? We'll have to wait and see!
Rye:
The other Jess in this category is from the greatest state in the Union, although she could have picked a better PART of the state to be from. (Upstate > Downstate! Forever and for always!) Rye's always been hailed as one of EoFF's cutest females, and now she brings that reputation into the Sexiest category. Rye's always got potential to win any award she's nominated for (and there are a lot of them), but can she beat out the competition for this one?
ShlupQuack:
Shlup is a past winner of this award, an Administrator, and her husband is in the band. Sexy.
smittenkitten:
Danielle's sleeping with
Award Guy BoB. She could easily rig this thing. Not to mention her incredible real-life sexiness. No one has put it better than our fallen comrade Lynxie did
last time around two times ago. He simply asked one pertinent question: "Have you seen her breasts?" And anyone who can say "yes" will know why she's here.
Alright ladies, I've gone long enough. I'd like to thank DK after the fact for stealing some of the parts of this speech directly from him. Time to find out who the winner is!
Originally Posted by Psychotic
It is how I voted, too. Kaycee is smurfing hot. smurf you Dan and Keith. She is.Wat
is
going
on
wtf
rawr
Master of the Fork
Cid's Knight
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