I'm moving my room around. Well not the room itself, but the furniture in the room. All just in time to leave for Christmas break so that by the time I return, the layout will still be fresh, new and still way anti-feng shui.
So I lifted my bookshelf from under my bed (my thirty pound hard wood bookshelf) paying no heed to the slippery dust thinly coating the shelf. It slipped. AND LANDED RIGHT ON MY TOE.
Everything was in slow-mo. I feared the worst. I feared emergency room visits for vicodin, blood and toenails flying through the air. I feared my goddamn toe would fall off. (IN JOKE) I feared for my very life if the people downstairs decided they'd had enough of the crazy bitch on the fourth floor was being TOO LOUD DURING FINALS.
The shelf landed true, right on my second toe. It cracked my steel toe-ring right in two and slammed against my big toe. THIS WAS IT...
... but there was no pain. Maybe it had landed so hard the pressure instantly vaporized my toe, cauterizing the wound in the process. Maybe I'd died of shock at losing a toe. I opened my squinted eyes to inspect the damage.
My toes were fine. The big one had a little red mark on it, but it was still there. I couldn't believe my eyes!
As my heartbeat returned to normal, I thought about my situation pragmatically. What had just happened to me? Could it be ... my toe is invincible?
I promise to use this power only for good. And for drunk-bets.
Have you ever experienced an accident that should've hurt you, made you cry or killed you and come out virtually unscathed?