Greatest Puns ever

[The Devil]

"I submitted 10 puns to a contest."
"Did any of them win?"
"No pun in ten did."

Don't remember where I heard that one.

The successful farmer was often noted as being outstanding in his field.

What do you get when you throw a piano down a mineshaft?
A flat minor

Why did the musician have hydroxide?
He wanted to play bass

Why did the pianist get a fish?
He needed a tuna

Why wasnt the guy without arms allowed in the bar?
He couldnt hold his liquor

Why dont asymtopes ever get pulled over?
Then never go over the limit

A number goes into a bar and says im always greater than zero
the bartender goes "are you sure"
and the number says "absolutely"

These are good, y'all.