Well sirs, madams, I have to regretfully inform you that whilst theres a lot of crap flying around in space, that satellite was responsible for the broadcast of all the crap thats shown on TV these days, therefore it was an act of kindness for the good of humanity. It needed to be done.

As for mister blowfield? I'd react with: Blowfield? wow you blow yourself in a field? that's sick man you need help.