Okay, I'll fix those two now.

1.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/1612814-post147.html

2.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/1591143-post101.html

and some new ones:

3) 3 posts that contain the greenie smilie.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2150023-post15.html
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2150023-post15.html
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2148211-post4.html


23) 1 post with at least 5 different smilies.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2149249-post4.html


26) 1 post entirely in a real language other than English.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2111589-post3.html


27) 1 post that contains an image with alt text.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2505760-post21.html

13) 2 posts by Jess without the jess smilie.
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2368299-post1512.html
http://forums.eyesonff.com/2368251-post1471.html