I'm sending out a message in a bottle tomorrow and there's nothing you can do to stop me, EoFF. You can, however, influence what I put inside it. So far I'm thinking of putting in my fingernails and some frozen peas, I figured that'd be gross enough. I will also write the address to this thread on the note I put inside.
I encourage you all to do the same! at least with the address, maybe not so much the frozen peas.
and screw all of you who don't live nearby the coast.