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Thread: The Official Third Party Thread

  1. #1

    Default The Official Third Party Thread

    This is the obligatory third party that by defaults disagrees with both parties on every issue, will inevitably accomplish nothing but stealing votes from one of the other parties, and will likely never get a chance to participate in a debate.


    The War


    In 2001, Citizen Bleys launched a vicious terrorist attack on Eyes on FF, destroying the World Events forum. In response. EoFF sent in a team of Cid's Knights to God Hates Fraggles', a forum belonging to Bleys' close ally, Dr Unne, upon rumours that it was harbouring hackers and spambots. After an initial spam bombardment, the forces of Unne surrendered and the Cid's Knighs began an occupation, where insurgents launch daily assaults upon them.

    The Third Party believes we shoudl end the problem now buy deleting their forum from the face of the internet and erasing all traces of them from history, including this statement.

    Homeland Security
    The Third Party Believes the CK's shouldn't have the power to view IP's and all that, but only because its a waste of time. Due to all the defenses one could use to hide themselves, its best to allow CK's to ban on suspicion alone.

    Law & Order
    The Third Party believes that both sides of the argument are wrong. The only true solutions is to hide all pornography in a newly implemented spoiler system, where you ahve to click a tab to open the spoiler window, where teh tab says 'inapropriate crap in box' and call it good.

    The Economy
    By eliminating adds and sponsers, we, The Third Party, will run EoFF without the use of charging members either. The means by which we will fund EoFF is by fundraisers. (SPOILER) And various illegal activities.

    Immigration
    Clearly EoFF needs new members to thrive, however many EoFFers feel that new posters will take all the good threads. However, The Third Party supports allowing all to join, under teh condition that the only threads newbies are allowed to make are Threads about what your favorite things are, hottest people/characters, Their own newbe thread and threads about Back Hair.

    One final condition is that all Newbie Posts are limited to 50 Characters.

    All Posters who are registed before the year 2009 are granted Amnesty, and for purposes of this law are considered oldies and are not limited to the character or thread creation limits imposed.

    Now, I know the other parties have their little groups of people running, but I'm a third party. And we all know that the only people anyone cares about in these elections are the president. So there isn't a point in anyone running for any office other then president.

    Besides, when I'm president I fully intend to change the laws to allow myself to run all those positions anyway, so meh.

    Members
    Neocracker

  2. #2
    One Hundred Chimneys Recognized Member Tavrobel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Election Booth View Post
    IMPORTANT NOTICE #2: There are only two parties this year, pre-made by us, your Election Booth friends. So please don't go making your own party threads; they will be closed. Yeah, we know it's a change from the old format, but go on, give it a go, it might be more fun! And if it's not, we'll forget this sorry incident and it'll never happen again, so everybody wins. Sorry if you had a great bitchin' party idea, but hey, you can still make that your individual standpoint!
    Take it to PMs, Nader.

  3. #3

    Default

    The Avalanche Party's goal is simply to beat you guys. That way, we can say that we did a job well done.

  4. #4
    One Hundred Chimneys Recognized Member Tavrobel's Avatar
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    No, my friend, that is not our purpose, or else we are no better than the Establishment. We can find a way to coexist. I gave them an alternative. Your actions may compromise the integrity to our organization. We are not here to trounce. We are here to spread the truth.

    I am an agent of the truth. And the Powers That Be have called it in this way.

  5. #5

    Default

    I know of the rule.

    But if every third party bowed out, it would be a disgrace to our forefathers who ran multiple parties.

    You NEED me to hold this system together.

  6. #6
    Gold is the new black Goldenboko's Avatar
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    No, we don't. We might've gotten Gore dude. We might've gotten Gore, if it wasn't for you people.

  7. #7
    GO! use leech seed! qwertysaur's Avatar
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    *Throws an etrog at Neocracker*

  8. #8

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    I exist to make a point people.

    And Gore, Bush, does it really matter? They both sucked.

    At least gore would be to pre-occupied hugging trees to screw the economy.

  9. #9
    No votes for you! Recognized Member Election Booth's Avatar
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    Default

    Official? I don't recall approving this!

  10. #10

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    The approval of a corrupt and unjust system means little to The Third Party.

  11. #11
    Phantasmal Killer Værn's Avatar
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    Even though this party is against the rules and has virtually no chance of winning... Sign me up =D


  12. #12
    One Hundred Chimneys Recognized Member Tavrobel's Avatar
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    Our forefathers also believed in the absolute distrust of the masses. In a world where information is at the beck and call of the simple person, we cannot rely on the elitist notions of the past. All people have an opinion, and they should be allowed to exercise that ability in constructive manners.

    The system is what gave us the 1912 travesty; the third party, the Knights of the Dark World tore away the votes from the party of Altima. It allowed Woodrow Wilson Sir Fratley to ascend to the top, and it was disastrous for all.

  13. #13
    No votes for you! Recognized Member Election Booth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NeoCracker View Post
    The approval of a corrupt and unjust system means little to The Third Party.
    See, I was gonna give you a chance, but that just hurts.

  14. #14
    Ghost of Christmas' past Recognized Member theundeadhero's Avatar
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    Anybody who joined after 2004 should have been considered a newbie. Then, maybe.
    ...

  15. #15
    Feel the Bern Administrator Del Murder's Avatar
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    Go ahead! Throw your vote away!

    Proud to be the Unofficial Secret Illegal Enforcer of Eyes on Final Fantasy!
    When I grow up, I want to go to Bovine Trump University! - Ralph Wiggum

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