Yeah, colour would do this one a world of good. Much curvier than your other drawing and I like this one all the more for that reason. The only problems I have are...

1. I still don't like the whole "seeing the eyes over the hair" thing, especially when evertyhing else is very anatomically correct. I can understand eyes-over-hair in anime style drawings because, well, they're very simple and don't give a crap about detail. Quite frankly, anime drawings for the most part are very sub-par, but things (such as eyes over hair) allow artists to show emotion better. With drawings as detailed as this, though, you should be able to do without such things and instead focus on giving the character emotion through more realistic methods.

2. The colouring will undoubtedly fix this if you manage it, but the bottom line of the lips is barely visible on my high resolution CRT monitor, and because of that her mouth looks really weird, sort of like this: ^

But yeah, I like this picture a lot. Her hair is awesome.