I hide my beautiful chest. It is for paying customers only.
What have I done? Besides the rampant slaughter of babies and kittens? Nothing. Nothing at all. There must be some mistake, officer.
I will fight for what I believe in.
My weapon is the most powerful of all: My junk. Seriously, there is nothing more effective than a man whipping out his dong and rubbing it. Just imagine this: You're a mugger. You pull a knife on a guy and demand he gives you his wallet. Then all of a sudden he's got his Johnson out and he's furiously giving it some attention with a big grin on his face. What the smurf. You can't mug this guy. And...oh god what if he has AIDS! Crap better run!
Guantanamo Bay.