IT'S A CONSPIRACY

[Blue Harvest]

"Why can't anyone see that Demon Dude is being followed by Psychotic? It's all so that Levian, hidden in a secret HQ near EoFF can spam EoFF to death. After that, Psychotic will pwn n00bs on Halo when the disorder caused by Levian reaches a peak. The only thing we can do is let Harvey put together a militia to stop them. "

c o n s p i r e : d i s c o v e r

[Old Manus]

Why can't anyone see that some cheap whore is being spied on by swansea for the cup? It's all so that titties, hidden in a secret HQ near your mother can running out of things to put in these boxes. After that, swansea for the cup will this probably isn't going to make any sense when the disorder caused by titties reaches a peak. The only thing we can do is let i really need the toilet right now put together a militia to stop them.

[Loony BoB]

That might be about as good as it gets in this thread.

[rubah]

"A rogue A.I. is stealing people so that it can *snip* posts by putting them into a computer simulation where they have to track Kentarou to a secret base near the Feedback Forum. The mental power thus produced by the captive thinkers allows Hsu, in league with the AI, to compromise GoldenBoko allowing Hsu to give everyone wedgies. "

Now you know where all those snipped posts go.

[KentaRawr!]

I remember making a conspiracy theory about Loony BoB penetrating a base entitled M.E. (Military Explosion). It was pretty stupid. Let's see if this can do any better.

"A rogue A.I. is stealing people so that it can penetration of Military Explosion by putting them into a computer simulation where they have to track Me to a secret base near Eyes on FF. The mental power thus produced by the captive thinkers allows Loony BoB, in league with the AI, to compromise Rubah allowing Loony BoB to control of the world. "

That didn't quite work.

Edit:

"Isn't it obvious that the Queen has been killed by the CIA and replaced by an agent of Tony Blair who has undergone extensive plastic surgery? Clearly the CIA is planning to take over the world when the agent of Tony Blair assassinates David Shayler. The only solution is for the Vietnam Veterans Association to stop the CIA and Tony Blair, which is impossible unless Congress will pass a resolution to allow the public to own main battle tanks. "

Much better!

[Breine]

"Obviously Xena is carrying out a covert war against the armies of Sasquatch in inside your panties. Very soon RoboCop, who is currently only supplying weapons to Xena, will join in. Austin Powers has a number of nuclear devices hidden in a pineapple under the sea which RoboCop is trying to steal to help win the war and watch Buffy all night. We must help Muppet Dracula to stop them, or we are all doomed! "

...

[~*~Celes~*~]

"Why can't anyone see that Global Warming is being watched by Al Gore? It's all so that Hillary Clinton, hidden in a secret HQ near Your Mom can [leeza]*snip* ~<3, Leeza[/leeza]. After that, Al Gore will *ban*~ <3, Psy when the disorder caused by Hillary Clinton reaches a peak. The only thing we can do is let Sephiroth put together a militia to stop them. "

[Caraliz]

"The national newspapers are filled with coded articles saying that A big batch of poo poo is plotting to using the toilet without toilet paper while Jesus is being persecuted by A poo loving fiend to draw attention away from the vile plans of A big batch of poo poo. "

[Meat Puppet]

Nobody really understands how dire the situation is these days. The world is being run by invisible and eternal monsters that orchestrate circuses like presidential elections and 5-dollar-footlongs so that we petty humans go on about our business and keep producing their food which they eat: they feed off of our fecal matter. What is even worse is that the monsters look exactly like that (and by that I mean us) and, if you dissect one, you’ll find that their insides are just the same as ours. There was this thing with angels in a field but I can’t remember the rest. The scariest part is that the evil move beside us, and there’s no way to tell. A lot of the time I get worried, I mean, you don’t even know if you’re one or not. What if I’m one? I could be. I might have to put a gun in my mouth one of these days just to be safe.