Simon Cowell. Between the X-Factor and...loads of other shows, Simon Cowell is a professional ass.
Mr. Cowell is such a charming and benevolent man, he shall be honored with the Award Of Excellence That Somewhat Reminds Us Of Simon Cowell. Most Likely To Be Simon Cowell for short.
Oh, Mr. Cowell. Why so sad? Today is your day! Wait, did your buddy Gordon Ramsey take Paula Abdul away?
Oh wait...human emotion is irrelevant to Mr. Cowell, much like the previously nominated members. Who will make Mr. Cowell proud and take home to the glory?
The award for Most Likely To Be Simon Cowell is...