Nerves

[TheAbominatrix]

So I have to be up to leave for Los Angeles in about 2 hours and I havent slept a wink. I'm very anxious about today, I have to go to court to testify about a murder that occurred outside of my workplace last year. I'm not in any trouble or anything like that, but I'm still so nervous that i can't shut my mind off. My stomach hurts, my chest is tight, and I just wish I could get this over with already.

Tell me stories about your nerves! Good stories! Do you get nervous a lot? Anxiety issues? Gas? Some people fart a lot when they get nervous, I'm glad I'm not one of those people, though who doesn't enjoy a good fart?

I get all anxious and amped up anytime I go somewhere, even if I'm on my way to having a good time. I feel weird all the way until we get there, then I loosen up and enjoy myself.

And I do mean loosen.

STORIES!

[Parker]

I get sweaty in unfortunate places and that is not good at all. Also the fart thing.

Lucky I don't get nervous often then.

[Iceglow]

I'm naturally a very chatty person, when I get nervous I go very quiet and speak only when prompted to do so. It's quite clear that something is wrong with me when I'm not my usual noisy self. I don't often get nervous but being ill has the same effect on me.

[Aerith's Knight]

I have a terrible height problem. The worst was when I was in the eiffeltower, where when you walk up the stairs, you can look down through the mesh.

I don't think I've ever been so terrified. Strangely, plane flights do nothing to me. I guess it's because I've been on more than 30, it looses its edge.

[Captain Maxx Power]

I've hinted at my problems with anxiety a few times around here, but I've never really gone into it in detail. I suppose this is as good a time as any. Anxiety never really affected me as a child that much. I do remember a number of times though when I suffered something akin to a panic attack, though at such a young age I had no concept of such a thing and passed it off as a random occurrence. It's hard to pin-point exactly when I started having them. It wasn't like it was a sudden event that triggered it as in some people, I guess since I was already predisposed to such behaviour, coupled with some pretty nasty stuff going on in my life, it flared up to the point where it became a major part of my life.

To say my existence was misery is an understatement. Everyday I would struggle to do even the most menial of tasks because of panic. Even stuff that would seem relatively benign for most people, such as going to school, would send me into uncontrollable panic episodes. This wasn't just one-off's either, this was everyday. I was aware I had a problem and I did seek help, however it was the wrong type of help. I was convinced that my mind was fundamentally diseased, and that I had absolutely no control over my attacks. As with many sufferers my own tactic was to retreat from a situation into a comfort zone, usually my home. Of course now I realise that's the most counter-productive thing to do when trying to conquer panic, but like I say at the time I just hadn't grasped the real issues.

The attacks came and went with frequency and severity throughout my college life. Once I went to University for the first time since I was living close to where the University was my panic wasn't as severe simply because I knew I could get home quickly if needed. That didn't stop me from having panic episodes, sat chewing myself up for no good reason. Half-way through the course I realised quite severely that it wasn't what I wanted to do with my life, causing my anxiety to increase. It reached a peak just before I finally quit the course, though dipped off slightly when I managed to get a place on a follow-up course, one that would eventually lead to me getting a first in a subject I adore.

During this time there was a series of dramatic events involving where I lived that meant my anxiety levels peaked to perhaps the highest they had ever been. My childhood was punctuated by some negative events but the one constant I had was where I lived. By contrast my Dad, who I was living with whilst at University, moved more often than the gypsy's. Because of this my stability was destroyed. Coupled with the fact that I had already quit one course and was desperate to do well with my new one, I had something akin to a nervous breakdown. I developed a severe case of Agoraphobia and spent a good three weeks unable to leave the flat. On reflection I was relatively lucky in that some people who have these problems go years without help, whereas I only reached my trough for a few weeks. Nevertheless it was still three weeks of torture. I kept beating myself up mentally, saying I was worthless, unworthy of being called a decent human being, the whole palaver. My self-esteem has always been incredibly low my entire life, so imagine having someone constantly calling you the worst possible things all day. That's what was going on in my mind.

I hid a lot of my problems from my Dad. For some reason I thought he would be furious at me. Again this is a symptom of the problem I have, in that I tend to project the very worst opinions onto other people without reason. Of course I should have known better given that my Dad not only suffered with the same problems at my age as well, but is also one of the most understanding fathers anyone could hope to have. Once I did tell him about my problems he was incredibly supportive despite the problems that he was facing at the time (another factor as to why I never told him since I didn't want to "disturb" him). However, the major turning point for me was buying a self-help book on the subject, the ironically named "Don't Panic". No, not that book, this book. Reading this, I can say without hyperbole, literally changed my life. For the first time I genuinely understood what was going on in my mind. I began to realise that my panic attacks were a product purely of my own making, that my thoughts directly lead into panic attacks. I also learned of various techniques I could use to control the panic attacks. But most importantly of all, I learned to accept this part of my psyche. It seems counter-productive to most Western minds since our attitude is when faced with a problem tackle it head on. But the key to dealing with panic is to accept it when it happens. The more you fight it, the strong it becomes and the more hold it has over you.

As I stated I eventually managed to overcome my panic enough to pass my degree with a first. Panic is something I still live with even today, a good ten years since it started getting bad, but it no longer has control over me in the same way it used to. On occasion it gets to me, but like all psychological diseases it comes and goes and I'll never truly be rid of it. But that's perfectly fine by me, nobody's perfect. If I could give one piece of advice to people who have panic attacks it's this; Never be ashamed. You're not abnormal, you're not a loser, you're just who you are.

[Fonzie]

*snip* Don't be a dick ~hero

[Captain Maxx Power]

*snip* I'll snip this out here since I did in the otherwhere, but I read your post and found it interesting ~hero

Thanks for taking the time to read and reply to my life story and inner-most thoughts on the subject. Appreciate it, really.

[Parker]

I read it it was ok.

[Rye]

When I get nervous, I'm pretty much gone. The way I was raised, my parents didn't really explain why certain things were bad, they just plain put the fear of ever loving christ into me. About everything.

So as a result of sitting being made to sit through TV shows and videos and people who get murdered and raped by random strangers and being constantly told things like "HEY JESS. HEAR ABOUT THAT YALE GIRL? SHE GOT MURDERED AND STAPLED TO WALL OR SOMETHING. YOU'RE GOING TO COLLEGE SOON, DON'T TRUST NO ONE, IT'LL HAPPEN TO YOU IF YOU DO!!!", I'm pretty much a wreck at night time, when I'm convinced bad things will happen to me. At my best, I have to shut my windows and lock my bedroom door at night, and sleep with a bunch of lights on and my TV.

At my worst, if I hear a noise, I pretty much get paralyzed with fear and sob and hyperventilate, and sometimes freak out at someone online that has my phone number so that if there is a home invasion and someone is going to kill me, they can call 9-11 and try to save me. Until I somehow fall asleep.

I'm kind of concerned for when I come back to NY and go apartment hunting. I'm not sure if I'll be capable of living on my own in that one respect.

Also, I bite nails! xD

tl:dr: I have minor anxiety issues. Boo.

[rubah]

I have medication that means something has got to be pretty damn bad before I get very worried. It's the best thing in the world to be able to go somewhere... Hell, even stay home, and not be on the verge of freaking out.

Like sometimes, you don't know how bad something is until you see how it could be otherwise

[Quindiana Jones]

I have a lot of insecurities that, although I usually just ignore, still make me sweat and stutter in certain situations. An example of me nervous is in the video thread. You can hear my nerves in how I'm talking.

I do not make a good public speaker.

[scrumpleberry]

My first nerves problem, well, it's really embarrassing for me to even admit it, because it sounds so pathetic. So... I won't.

But a couple of years ago, I totally got over any semblance of stage or performance fright I used to have. It just didn't come any more. I still get hideous butterflies before, but when I'm up there I'm calm as anything and I take on a more DGAF YOU CAME HERE TO WATCH ME IF I'M THAT'S TOO BAD attitude, which I think helps my performance. I can still feel adrenaline though. It's weird. But basically I don't think too hard or freeze up or stutter any more, which is great.

[Vermachtnis]

Gotta move, gotta move, gotta do something. Can't set still. IgottamoveanddosomethingIshouldntbesettingstill.

As y'all may or may not know my two biggest fears are of needles and blood. And when I have to get a shot I am pretty much bouncing around the waiting room. I miss the days of ol' when waiting rooms had toys. Adults like to play with toys too ya know. And blood, I can't be in the same room as someone with an exposed wound. Even the tiniest scratch freaks me out and gotta get outta there.

[Unbreakable Will]

Sometimes when I confront people about them doing stupid I get a bit nervous (I've been in a few fights that started from nothing). You just never know what people will do.
I tend to bite my nails or stutter a bit.

[Jess]

I laugh because that's the only way I can think of to hide the fact I'm nevous
I shake.
I go really really red in the face.

It's horrible, because it's so obvious I'm laughing to hide the fact I'm nervous, whilst my face is getting redder and redder and I'm shaking ;_;

I also bite my nails alot.