Spring, 21
Part Two!
author's note: For those who don't understand Dwarf Fortress wounds, each body part has a colour. Here is what each colour means, in order of severity:
Normal
Slight damage
Bruised
Broken
Mangled
Completely severed
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7th Slate
scrumpleberry, a Gem Setter, made a gruesome discovery today. The rotting corpse of one of the Dwarves who died under the rule of Necronopticous was found in our moat, the very same we get our drinking water from.
"Want me to make an engraving of his bloated body?" asked Dignified Pauper eagerly. What the smurf is up with these Dwarves?
The unfortunate Dwarf seems to have dropped a Steel Axe in there. We'll make retrieval efforts in the summer, when the corpse has fully decomposed to a skeleton.
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9th Slate
Another gruesome discovery, if not hilarious. A Fire Imp who has apparently lost its leg has been slowly crawling across the area, passing out from the pain with every step it makes. However, I remember that many Dwarves died under the previous overseer because of Fire Imps setting fire to the forest, so I send ShlupQuack out to deal with it.
With her out of the way, I have plans. I call together a meeting of the other soldiers, Rantzien, Jessweee, theundeadhero and Iceglow. DK cannot attend, he is still in bed.
I tell them she is a lunatic who cannot be trusted, and I form my own squad, The Gloved Bells (I think it is a catchy name okay?) with Jessweee and Rantzien as a part of it. Meanwhile, Iceglow is given a crossbow and form his own squad, The Rough Controls, which I hope to fill with other marksdwarves later.
I am pleased with our new titles, and I seem to have earned everyone's favour. Everyone's, that is, apart from theundeadhero. That snivelling little toad sucked up to ShlupQuack and refuses to leave her squad, even though she injured him in sparring! Pfah. Like I need a kiss-ass in my squad anyway.
Outside, ShlupQuack decided the best way to deal with an already crippled Fire Imp is to cripple it even further. You go, girlfriend!
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13th Slate
Today I was awoken by a dog barking. It was limping and covered with a lot of blood, which reminded me to check on Bunny.
He was soaked head to foot with blood and vomit. I asked rubah, who sometimes looks after the injured Dwarves, why he was in such a state. She shrugged her shoulders and carried on walking.
It looks like he won't be returning to action any time soon, and there is a lot of mining work to be done.
I noticed we had an abundance of picks in our supplies.
I grab Miriel, Chloe. and Baloki, thrust picks into their hands, and tell them to join Loony BoB and Old Manus in the mines. They don't seem too happy about it, but smurf them. There are no crossbows to make and we don't have a glassworks. Least they can do is earn their little mudholes in the ground.
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17th Slate
MILF, who has been keeping close watch on the Elves, has told me they are trying to escape! Ha ha, good luck. I shouted down into their pit and asked if they were willing to reveal their secrets to me, and they feigned ignorance. The cheek of them!
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1st Felsite
I am trying to have a power nap when Melissaur runs into my office in hysterics. She is supposed to be fetching water for poor DK but is shrieking at me instead. It seems there is a Werewolf on the loose!
I decide to put ShlupQuack and that lackey theundeadhero on the job. Hopefully it mangles them brutally and solves all of my problems.
The two pummel the wretched creature into the ground. Ah well. Maybe I can have smittenkitten carve me a nice werewolf-tooth necklace when she takes a break from making bone bolts for Iceglow.
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11th Felsite
Yet again MILF comes in with a status update on the Elves. This time it seems they have fully lost their marbles! They turn on each other and their pack animals join in!
One donkey tried to escape, so one of the Elves chased after it and we all watched as he beat it with his bare hands. I am told that in the pit itself, one of the donkeys has actually killed his two Elven masters.
Knowing the time to act was now, I grabbed Rantzien and had Laddy open the entrance to the prison. We quickly subdued the thrasing Elf.
I kept him held down while Rantzien started beating him. We yelled at him, demanding he reveal the secret of Elven magic, but he just roared and spat at us.
As we were doing this, ShlupQuack showed up with that theundeadhero guy in tow, demanding to know what's up. She decides that they can interrogate the crazy donkey in the deeps, and they head down to grab it.
Unsurprisingly, the donkey does not talk as they pound it to pieces. These attempts to talk to animals and subsequent torture further underline how mentally unstable this ShlupQuack truly is. It's a good job I got here when I did.
Eventually the two die, and the Elven Trade Caravan's goods are ours. Hurrah! Victory for Towntwinkles! Victory over the tree-hugging weaklings!
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21st Felsite
I am told by our Mechanic, Christmas, that one of the girls I told to go work in the mines, Chloe., has withdrawn from society. What this actually means is sitting on the floor of my nice new Dining Hall, not talking to anyone. I thought I had the insanity curbed...it seems I was mistaken.
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27th Felsite
Apparently the Elven and Donkey corpses have begun to rot and produce awful clouds of purple miasma. When Shattered Dreamer went down there to grab some of their gear, he vomitted violently.
Worse yet, it seems to be gathering in a thick mist near to where Red Pill and Værn are growing our plump helmet crops.
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29th Felsite
It's the end of Spring, and I feel I should make a record of what we have accomplished so far.
Here is a comprehensive list of all who dwell within Towntwinkles, and their roles.
The new dining hall is coming along well. Pictured: Myself, Iceglow, Chloe., Christmas, Del Murder, Flying Mullet. Partially obscured to the right are scrumpleberry and Sir Lancealot.
Tombs! In the bottom left corner is my own. I had Shiny chain a bear and a wolf (the question mark; Stonesense doesn't have a sprite for wolves yet) stolen from the Elves in there to guard my bones in the after life. The top two are for Marshall Banana and Necronopticous, former rulers, although I have yet to finish them. In the bottom right is the massed tomb, filled already with whatever was left of the Dwarves who died before I arrived.
The start of the Noble Quarter. Leeza's office and bedroom are the only furnished rooms down here as yet.
Finally, remember how I said I'd make a dining room for Rye totally out of the way of the rest of us? Here it is!
We'll see what Summer brings...
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Originally Posted by I'm my own MILF
Doubel ackt.
