Everyone It Is Going To Be Alright

[Madonna]

I once lived inside the confines of lush, green planet; the sun lit verdant grasses, pools of water glistened in both hues blue and green, and forests clawed paths across continents while mountains sang songs which howled to the sky's peak! Clouds were more white than white, rainbows even tasted of every color, and I think I can safely say I once enjoyed myself and the world I knew! All of that has shattered of late!

Now furtive eyes seek the shadows clouds cast, suspicious hands wave through intangible color cascades, and joy has been a rare pleasure to visit my heart! Mountains are less majestic and more craggy, water is murky and unfiltered, forests are wild and dangerous, and the grass is yellow and rough! What negativity has struck here, my dear Eyeson?!

Rather than let you draw your own erroneous conclusions, I shall do you a grand favor and break it to you: General Chat has gotten serious! Oh, I know; you gasped just then, as I did too when I realized what had struck this cesspool of villainy and levity! But bear with me, faint survivors of a more carefree time; we might be growing into straight-faced boring people!

Indeed, pray look closer at recent threads of late and realize the gravity with which some of our posters attack absurd premises and situations! A thread about people overdosing on homeopathic remedies?! A proper answer would be, "Good! I hope they all die!" Are girls weird!? Of course they are; every male knows this! Of course, all females know otherwise, but we shall ignore this contradiction because this is not Eyes On Each Other and I am not going to take anyone seriously here!

Lighten up, guys and dolls, and do not make me scroll over another ten-minute post with cherry-picked quotes! Please, I beg of you!

But also do a better job than those Wonder Square kids; man, are they hopeless!

[Raistlin]

Almost as hopeless as your face.

[Shlup]

[Bastian]

Are you on acid?

[eestlinc]

ped xing?

[Raistlin]

Are you on acid?

You think this is strange? You really don't know Lynx.

[rubah]

I CAN"T BELIEVE YOU JUST SAID THAT GENIUS LYNX. I AM SO OFFENDED I HOPE YOU GO DIE IN A FIRE OF LOVE BECAUSE REALLY I LOVE YOU AND ALWAYS HAVE EVEN THOUGH YOU SAY I WILL NEVER BE OLD ENOUGH TO DRINK WITH YOU I AM GOING TO DRINK ON MY OWN AND SHOW YOU ALL.

yeah, it's been a little serious lately. these things are phases man. You just gotta outlive outlast outplay.

[Madonna]

Did you just go Survivor on me, Miss Lapiz?! You disgusting wretch, I thought better of you! Now it is two more years until I consider spend a night carousing with you!

Raistlin and Shlup, I hope you two fatties manage to work it out and have many fat children! You can make the world a fattier place!

[demondude]

[Mo-Nercy]

So quit whining like a little girl and/or camel/llama thing.

[Old Manus]

PROTECT MY BALLS

[krissy]

PROTECT MY BALLS

even if the whole world turns against them
i'll

i'll be their knight

[Rye]

Dammit Krissy, stop making me laugh so much. You're going to break the Reputation Sytem limit.

[Bastian]

It's raining cupcakes; hallelujah! It's raining cupcakes.

[Madonna]

Whoa, lay off the high fructose corn syrup, which causes life cancer, and chill some, you guys! I am not horribly serious, you do not need to be seriously horrible, and I am sure we can all find some happy ground somewhere between!