Funny and slamming review lmao.

[Slothy]

Yeah, I don't care if its an RPG, games should grab you by the proverbial "stones" the moment you start playing. Not promise to be good 10 or 20 hours in.

If there's one thing that's surprised me most about this game, it's the number of people who like it and make excuses for it not being fun from the start, or the very few who basically tell me I'm crazy for not liking it right off the bat. If it took about an hour to really get going I could probably forgive that, but every time I look at the game clock now I can't help but think that I could have played through Portal again in the time I've spent waiting for the good stuff to start.

And is it just me, or are there some cut scenes in this game that look fun enough that they should have been playable? When Lightening and the others were trying to escape in an airship early in the game I found myself wishing I could have piloted it because it looked like it was more fun than anything in the game thus far. I think it would have made a fun little mini-game.

[VeloZer0]

And is it just me, or are there some cut scenes in this game that look fun enough that they should have been playable? When Lightening and the others were trying to escape in an airship early in the game I found myself wishing I could have piloted it because it looked like it was more fun than anything in the game thus far. I think it would have made a fun little mini-game.

But then you wouldn't have been able to fully appreciate the graphical wonder that the producers wanted it to be. I speak sarcastically, but this is 100% the truth.

[kotora]

FFXIII is hardly a graphical wonder. It does look good and well-polished, but that's about it. It looks exactly what you'd expect from a big-budget console game.

[VeloZer0]

Which is the funny thing about making the graphics driving force in the game.

[Cloudane]

If there's one thing that's surprised me most about this game, it's the number of people who like it and make excuses for it not being fun from the start

Guilty.

I dunno.... I think after FFXII, *anything* was going to be brilliant by comparison, IMO (I know, some people said it was the best one. Generally people who didn't like Final Fantasy).

It's even to the point of a bit of desperation to have a good FF again.. I think if you want something to be good badly enough, you see it through rose tinted specs. See Windows 7, when everyone was itching to move on from XP and scared of Vista's rep. (7 is actually very good on a technical and personal experience basis, but is not as "OMG YAY groundbreaking" as some are making out)

Looking at it logically, it's poor. It took most of the game to get started, then just as it was getting exciting (after a grinding session) it sent you back to Corridor World to wrap up the game. And the story climaxed in the most illogical possible way, and then ended abruptly. But I somehow found it a very fun ride still. Whether it was the after-FFXII effect or the desperation effect I don't know... I think there were a lot of other more subtle things about the game that absorbed me into it. A memorable and immersive world, I thought.

Hasn't that often been the way with FF? Technically, from a critic's angle, rubbish. And yet it somehow 'connects' with you when you're playing. The only one that sticks out as being technically excellent (XII) is the one I hated.

[seiferalmasy2]

From what I can see here and elsewhere there is a sizeable number of people who actually think being granted a "calm lands" in 1 chapter is an amazing award for absurd amount of linear "gameplay".

I really can't imagine Final fantasy VII ever having the same amount of fanbase or reverance if it had began like XIII. In fact I am pretty sure a lot of people wouldn't have stuck around for VIII.

20 hours to get a glimpse of what you actually bought the game for (JPRG) is not exactly spectacular, nor is it fair on the paying customer. In their efforts to explore HD graphics, they decided to cut as much fat and muscle as was possible, leaving a hollow bone (but fear not, it is a hollow bone that looks wonderful lmao ).

[LunarWeaver]

I always think he's pretty funny. He drops some good points on games on the basis of creating a joke, but to look at him for a valid review of a video game is like going to The Onion for all your serious news. He's an entertainer first and last.

[Slothy]

Hasn't that often been the way with FF? Technically, from a critic's angle, rubbish. And yet it somehow 'connects' with you when you're playing. The only one that sticks out as being technically excellent (XII) is the one I hated.

I wouldn't say that at all. Plenty of the FF titles have been utterly brilliant in their gameplay, story and pacing. Especially titles like FFIV, V, VI, IX and XII if you ask me. Some titles have somehow gained a large fanbase despite numerous flaws, but even those usually had some aspect that sort of made up for the problems, or some charm that shone through the flaws. I'm not sure FFXIII has any, but then again, I wouldn't put it past me to just have a much lower tolerance for bad game design now than I did even five years ago. It's probably what I get for wanting to be a game designer.

[kotora]

Whether it was the after-FFXII effect or the desperation effect I don't know... I think there were a lot of other more subtle things about the game that absorbed me into it. A memorable and immersive world, I thought.

Hasn't that often been the way with FF? Technically, from a critic's angle, rubbish. And yet it somehow 'connects' with you when you're playing. The only one that sticks out as being technically excellent (XII) is the one I hated.

What do you mean by immersive world? The big tunnel called "Pulse", or chapter 11? Because there's a big difference between being immersed in the game or in the world itself (which is very, very bland).

Also I don't see what you mean by FF games being technically bad. Like the poster above already said, the previous FF games did a lot of things right on the criteria we judge games on. I wouldn't call FFXII 'technically excellent' as it had hardly any story or character development.

[Cloudane]

It's not something I can easily put my finger on. Maybe the scenery, which was a lot more interesting than, say, all of XII's bland sewers, underground station type things and forests. Sure it was mostly corridors, but pretty ones to look at, which draws me in as a player (why would I be drawn in by boring scenery).

Technically bad as in, if you analyse the story. I wasn't very clear there. XIII's just... makes no sense by the time you've got to the end and look back on what just happened. VIII is another good example (Ultimecia made little sense, time travel is usually a plothole in itself and it needed the "R=U" theory which I seem to recall Square had actually denied, to make sense of it). VII to some extent due to not being told very clearly, although this was fixed (with a debatable amount of retconning) in Advent Children.

I'm not a story analyser, but I've seen time and time again XII hailed as superb due to the story and characters being realistic with proper dark human flaws, like Ashe being pretty much as bad as the "bad guys", and the whole thing being a bit of a grey area anyway where there's no 100% definable "good/evil". Supposedly everything was tied together very well too. The characters are usually described as being "refreshingly subtle". Generally this all tends to be seen as "good technically" in a story from what I've seen.
Personally I couldn't stand it because I couldn't feel much of a connection with the characters, they were just this bunch of people I happened to be controlling. Worse, I constantly wanted someone to give Ashe a slap because I found her immensely spoilt, stroppy and unlikeable. And although some of it was good, I found most of the scenery boring (it didn't help that some areas were ridiculously long!)

Difficult to put into words. To each his own I guess; just because you lot hated XIII doesn't mean I have to, regardless of its flaws

[Mirage]

Too bad that's one of the weaker 0.'s he's made :p.

[seiferalmasy2]

VII to some extent due to not being told very clearly, although this was fixed (with a debatable amount of retconning) in Advent Children.

VII seems to be told well....the translation was bad. Which things did they retcon?

[Wolf Kanno]

It's not something I can easily put my finger on. Maybe the scenery, which was a lot more interesting than, say, all of XII's bland sewers, underground station type things and forests. Sure it was mostly corridors, but pretty ones to look at, which draws me in as a player (why would I be drawn in by boring scenery).
And although some of it was good, I found most of the scenery boring (it didn't help that some areas were ridiculously long!)

Difficult to put into words. To each his own I guess; just because you lot hated XIII doesn't mean I have to, regardless of its flaws

I'm going to have to disagree and give a counterpoint why you should never design dungeons like X/XIII or "Tube world" as they should be called.

The reason I like XII's dungeon/world design better is that the scale for me adds a ton more immersion cause its actually feels real. You get to explore these massive lands and monolithic dungeons and by god do they feel massive and monolithic like they are described and appear to be to the player. I can't get that out of the the other two titles, sure they are pretty but it soon becomes quickly apparent you are caged in on a simple road and all the beauty is simply just "wallpaper". I can't tell you how many times I was trying to explore in XIII's world and wishing I was off in the distance cause it felt like something more interesting was going on over there.

The spell of immersion easily smashed when you walk over to a place that should be easily accessible from sight (worse in XIII since your party can jump around structures) but find out you can't cause its not real, its just the wallpaper decorating the road. Its pretty, but its soulless and does nothing to help me care for the world. Getting to Gran Pulse in XIII, I never really wanted to go back to Cocoon cause GP felt so much more real than the rest of the game and I kept asking myself why the game couldn't be more like this. Even the story doesn't really justify the titles claustrophobic design, as your party is basically pursued by "boogie-men" for most of the game.

The terrible dungeon/world design has done nothing to help me feel for XIII's world, I feel FFI and FFII have far more immersive and interesting worlds than XIII has and that's sad when a twenty year old game with a town called "Elftown" is a much more immersive and fun place than a modern title using the highest scale graphics and a team 50 times larger to build it. We're in the modern age of gaming, we should be using technology to give the player more control and choice in games, not restrict them for the sake of story. I feel choice will create an immensely more immersive experience for the player over a world stripped of it with shiny wallpaper to compensate for it. One makes the player feel they are controlling and truly interacting with the world while the other makes them feel like they are on a poorly managed movie set where the lighting and raffling can be seen holding the scenery up.

[I Don't Need A Name]

I forgot how much I hate this man.

Thanks for imbedding that in my head.

[kotora]

Agree with all your points there, except I still think FFX had an immersive world because of the towns and interaction with NPCs.